Registry and Gift Forum

Conundrum!!! How will I notify guests about our registry?

Here is the deal:  We have no wedding party and the guest list is less than 50.  We are hosting the wedding ourselves.  Half of the guests are coming in from out of state and even the ones in state are about an hour away.  Both of our parents live 200 miles away and we have no wedding website or any interest in getting one.  We are not expecting any showers due to the distance of close friends who would be willing to throw one.

We made our registry before thinking about how guests would learn about it.  From what I have heard, etiquette suggests we are not in any way, shape, or form to put registry information in the invitations (even as an insert).  Aside from waiting on the unlikely event people ask us, is there a way we can let people know where we are registered without ditching etiquette?

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  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers

    Here is the deal:  We have no wedding party and the guest list is less than 50.  We are hosting the wedding ourselves.  Half of the guests are coming in from out of state and even the ones in state are about an hour away.  Both of our parents live 200 miles away and we have no wedding website or any interest in getting one.  We are not expecting any showers due to the distance of close friends who would be willing to throw one.

    We made our registry before thinking about how guests would learn about it.  From what I have heard, etiquette suggests we are not in any way, shape, or form to put registry information in the invitations (even as an insert).  Aside from waiting on the unlikely event people ask us, is there a way we can let people know where we are registered without ditching etiquette?

    No.  You only tell people about your registry is if they directly ask.  I would also tell your Mom where you are registered so she is able to relay that information to others if they ask her.

    But other then that, no there is no other way to relay this information.  If you registered at a typical place, such as Macy's, Target, BB&B or other similar places a lot of time it is very easy to do a google search and find your registry, so some guests may do this.

    [Deleted User]OliveOilsMomSTARMOON44
  • lyndausvilyndausvi Western Slope, Colorado mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    One should NOT spend this much time on how they will get gifts.  If you get gifts, great.  If you don't, NBD.

    People will ask, they know how to look for registries.  In my family they give money anyway. 








    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
    InLoveInQueensHeffalump
  • lyndausvi said:
    One should NOT spend this much time on how they will get gifts.  If you get gifts, great.  If you don't, NBD.

    People will ask, they know how to look for registries.  In my family they give money anyway. 



    Just to clarify, we are not spending a lot of time on how we will get gifts.  We are doing this on our own with very little outside help and our circumstances have become very unique and non-traditional.  Due to our schedules, it was hard for us to even complete the one store registry we have.  It was only after we started working on the invites that we realized this issue.  In my opinion, it would suck to have spent time on creating a registry to not use it. Our time could have been spent doing something else had we realized it sooner and gone without one.

    I just hope this helps some other Knottie out there.

  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Only if they ask you about it first.

    You're absolutely correct that your invitations can't contain any mention of gifts or registries. But you can tell anyone who asks you where you are registered. Also, anyone who really wants to know can Google the information.
    SP29
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    Here is the deal:  We have no wedding party and the guest list is less than 50.  We are hosting the wedding ourselves.  Half of the guests are coming in from out of state and even the ones in state are about an hour away.  Both of our parents live 200 miles away and we have no wedding website or any interest in getting one.  We are not expecting any showers due to the distance of close friends who would be willing to throw one.

    We made our registry before thinking about how guests would learn about it.  From what I have heard, etiquette suggests we are not in any way, shape, or form to put registry information in the invitations (even as an insert).  Aside from waiting on the unlikely event people ask us, is there a way we can let people know where we are registered without ditching etiquette?

    What would make you think it would be unlikely for people to ask? I had more than a dozen calls/emails/texts/FB messages asking me where we'd registered.

    If people want to know, they will ask. 
    [Deleted User]HeffalumpSP29
  • Thank you, everyone!  I did not know that you could search a person's name and find their registry.  I tried it and it worked.  That is a better option and we do not have to worry about breaking etiquette!  We will tell people if they ask and just tell our mothers directly in case anyone asks them.
    holyguacamole79SP29
  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I agree with PPs.  I'm going to a wedding this weekend and I just started going to the "typical" wedding registry sites (BB&B, Target, etc) and searched for their name.  I found it on the first try at BB&B.
  • I agree with PPs.  I'm going to a wedding this weekend and I just started going to the "typical" wedding registry sites (BB&B, Target, etc) and searched for their name.  I found it on the first try at BB&B.
    I used to do that years ago before the google-machine existed.  I'd walk into a Crate&Barrel because I love that store, and put into the registry machines the names of anyone I knew who was engaged.  Sometimes I'd find a friend's registry, I'd print it out, and walk around the store looking at what they registered for.  I found it to be a fun way to window-shop.
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