Facebook bride groups. The thing of entertainment.

RomanceManaged

I really hope I am not alone in thinking these facebook groups are freaking hilarious.

This one bride asked if it was ok to fire her MOH because "She lost her job and can no longer pay for her dress. I would like, be willing to pay for it, but then there's her hair and make up, and I don't want to be financially supporting her. Its MY wedding after all"

I sincerly hope her groom smashes cake all up in her uppity face.

If I black out names, can I screen shot some of this shit storm ?

lnixon8

They are amazing. My states consignment one usually turns into an wedding bee type thing ... which is somehow more annoying than everyone ISO a vendor that "won't cost me an arm an a leg". 

laurad75

I am on one coordinated by Weddington Way for May 2016 brides.  Its insane.  At first I acted like etiquette police (thanks to what I have learned here) but then I just gave up.  Instead of saying 'OMG no! No honeyfund!' I started gently recommending that they research it to make sure the company wasn't taking a cut.  I did successfully talk a bride out of hosting her own shower last week.  

Heffalump

I am so glad these didn't exist when I was getting married.  FB was relatively new(ish), and I was in a FB group with some regs from TK.  That was it.

kimmiinthemitten

Ugh everyone in mine is amazingly cheap. "ISO caterer for 150 with a budget of 500!" "ISO great photographer who is available with a second shooter for 10 hours. Can't spend more than $60". Selling my wedding dress, only worn once. Original sell price $1500 asking $1250. Hasn't been professionally cleaned. "

Also the 'it's your day' people are insane. I just talked someone into letting her BM pick whatever style dress they prefer over all of the shouts to "pick something and make them wear it. It's your day and they should support you!"

knottie2b256f5c2ae42586

I'm part of two groups for my area, but there usually isn't too much drama. I directed a bride who wanted a honeyfund to TK and was probably just too blunt in the way I said it because another poster said "if you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all"...yeah, like that ever helps ANYONE in any situation.

thisismynickname2

LOL to the "if you can't say anything nice." Does "bless your heart for wanting to pay two people each $3 an hour to take photos at your wedding, you're SO economical" count? 

RomanceManaged

Well, I told that girl that its pretty terrible to think that way in regards to her bridesmaid. And that she, the bride, should be honored this woman wants to stand us ap for her. In return, she should only have to show up in her dress sober the day of. The bride freaked out and said that is not how its done, and if she wants her girls to have hair done professionally then they are paying for it and her dad is a videographer. So she knows.

tigerlily6

Wow. I fully admit I came onto TK with foolish ideas, not knowing any better, but some of these tales I would have been shocked by even in all my naiveté. Glad that my internet guardian angels somehow steered me here and not to FB. 

RomanceManaged

I joined after TK for some awesome resales, but so far I haven't even found those! Its all burlap and lace, and while I don't judge burlap and lace, its so far from our colors and whatnot. Now its a train wreck that I can't look away from.

RomanceManaged

I hope this doesnt violate TOS.

KnickerGold

I didn't know these things existed... going to go waste hours reading the craziness!

glasgowtolondon

Endless hours of car crash reading! I just don't understand how some brides just seem to court drama at every turn. IDK, I just couldn't cope with a life that cray!

kimmiinthemitten

@RomanceManaged I wonder if this is the FB group I recently left? Is it one of the metro Detroit groups?  

JediElizabeth

I love the screenshot that tells the bride to think of the "bigger picture." Because costs of hair & make-up is the big picture as opposed to kicking your closest friend when she's down & out of a job. 

RomanceManaged

kimmiinthemitten said:

@RomanceManaged I wonder if this is the FB group I recently left? Is it one of the metro Detroit groups?  

No, its just called "The Brides Club", there are women from all over the states, and within the group they have state sub groups.

JediElizabeth said:

I love the screenshot that tells the bride to think of the "bigger picture." Because costs of hair & make-up is the big picture as opposed to kicking your closest friend when she's down & out of a job. 

Oh yeah. I know. I'll give you a guess as to which post was mine. Doubtful that I'll talk sense into these girls, so I'll just chuckle as I read.

RomanceManaged

Welp. Looks like I got hate mail for being a douche.

Knottie78583467

Well, it's probably wrong of you to go around blasting group members. Do these girls know that you're shaming and embarassing them outside of their seemingly confidential group? 

Knottie78583467

Also, did the poster EVER say that her friend had LOST HER JOB?! Don't think so. Maybe think about that before you go bullying. Maybe she's just trying to help a friend because she loves her. Think about that and quit being a bully to brides who are just asking for advice. 

JediElizabeth

Knottie78583467 said:

Well, it's probably wrong of you to go around blasting group members. Do these girls know that you're shaming and embarassing them outside of their seemingly confidential group? 

Knottie78583467 said:

Also, did the poster EVER say that her friend had LOST HER JOB?! Don't think so. Maybe think about that before you go bullying. Maybe she's just trying to help a friend because she loves her. Think about that and quit being a bully to brides who are just asking for advice. 

What? Reading over @RomanceManaged 's reply (at least the pictured one), she was actually pretty nice about telling that bride that she should be nice to her friend. 

RomanceManaged

She did actually. In the post. But there were too many comments to black out everyones names. And yeah, it is douchey, but its also douchey to make your bridesmaids feel like crap because they cant pay for your vision, when it isn't their job to do so. Also, I'm uncertain how she's helping a friend out in that situation. I fail to see that logic. But thank you random Knottie who joined just for this posting, I have seen the error of my ways and will discontinue being an interwebs bully.

RomanceManaged

JediElizabeth said:

Knottie78583467 said:

Well, it's probably wrong of you to go around blasting group members. Do these girls know that you're shaming and embarassing them outside of their seemingly confidential group? 

Knottie78583467 said:

Also, did the poster EVER say that her friend had LOST HER JOB?! Don't think so. Maybe think about that before you go bullying. Maybe she's just trying to help a friend because she loves her. Think about that and quit being a bully to brides who are just asking for advice. 

What? Reading over @RomanceManaged 's reply (at least the pictured one), she was actually pretty nice about telling that bride that she should be nice to her friend. 

Thanks! That was my only post. Just kind of left it at that before they kicked me out for being a bully.

Knottie78583467

Good for them for kicking you out, you were being the bully. I hope that you stop thinking being the bully is a joke, gets you kicked out of groups and all. 

Knottie78583467

She is being nice and thinking of ways to help her friend. This Knottie has read all of the comments on that post. Every last one of them and never once did she say that her friend had lost her job. In fact, this random Knottie does, in fact, know that the posters friend did not lose her job so why would she say. that. She's not a bully, she's a friend. Which is what you are not. Keep your thoughts to yourself.

levioosa

Knottie78583467 said:

Good for them for kicking you out, you were being the bully. I hope that you stop thinking being the bully is a joke, gets you kicked out of groups and all. 

You obviously fail to grasp the actual definition of what a bully is.  

And.....speshul snowflake alert! 

RomanceManaged

Yeah, I'm not really going to lose sleep for getting kicked out of a group. IMHO I believe suggesting that you would kick your friend (Using this term loosely here) out of your wedding because she is financially struggling, because it would cause you more stress, is in fact being a bully. I think its of the lowest form, and to make it worse you state she cannot "fork over the rest of the money" and "Its only $135 so they can't even be mad." For some people $135 is a huge amount to save, and they should not be shamed for that. Yeah, I'm throwing shade all over that shit storm posting, just like those girls shamed their nearest and dearest friends because they can't afford your vision. Perpective.

Again, I digress, I will not lose sleep. And my nearest and dearest (As I'm not the lonely hag you made me to be in your angsty facebook message...) will be honored, and appreciated. Because I am honored, and feel so appreciative for them.

End of rant.

Knottie78583467

Also, you're wrong. Kicking her out has never been and never will be an option. Helping her out in whatever way I can, that is an option. Also, I didn't send you the message. Also, my dresses aren't $135. I haven't even chosen dresses yet. There are multiple people in the thread, figure it out before you go around throwing words. Thanks. 

RomanceManaged

Welcome!

tigerlily6

"...I was always told being a bridesmaid is more than standing there looking all pretty. You have to put time effort and money into it. . . . . [I]f they didn't help then why would you even have bridesmaid!?"

This is the blurb that gets me. I have been a bridesmaid, and will be having six of my own. They are indeed not there simply to look "all pretty." They are there because our friendships have influenced and supported who I am, and will doubtless continue to inspire me through my marriage. They have already given that to me. All six of them live far away from me and are on budgets. I do not require a bunch of parties or their money or their time, and will be pretty darn proud just to know they will be there beside me. 

glasgowtolondon

New knottie#'s, since you've joined this forum I would seriously suggest reading some of the threads. There is one about 4 down from this called bridesmaids financial responsibilities, but brides like you are on here all the time to complain about their maids, so if you don't like that one there are many, many more. You might find them enlightening. But first let me congratulate you for not kicking your girl out because she can't (or doesn't want to) afford your unreasonable demands, you sound like a really great person and I look forward to you becoming a key part of this community.

kimmiinthemitten

Disagreeing with someone isn't bullying.  Searching for and finding them on another forum, then joining just to give them a piece of your mind...that's questionable at best.