This is just a vent; there's nothing I can do and I really hate to complain about anyone throwing a party for me so I just need to get the annoyance off my chest.
I am very lucky to have four great bridesmaids who have offered to host a shower and a b-party for me. My MOH wanted to plan the b-party and the other BM's are planning the shower. For the most part I have not been involved and it's been smooth sailing.
My MOH and I have been kind of drifting apart for awhile and I haven't talked to her about anything related to the wedding or b-party in months. I'm not a big drinker and definitely not a party or dance type girl, and all I really want to do is go out to eat hibachi and anything else is just gravy. So, to be honest, I wasn't really worried about whether the party happened or not and didn't plan to push for more info from MOH or check in on her progress. The shower is the same day so if nothing got planned I was just going to suggest that the group head out for hibachi after the shower and then spend the night with my cousins (who are bridesmaids).
The last I heard from MOH, she was on board with hibachi and was planning a trip to an "escape room" type event where you have to solve puzzles, etc. to get out. We chatted about this and I said my only concern is that I have somewhat of a bossy personality type that gets a lot worse under stress, and I was concerned about getting frustrated or stressed and yelling at someone at the party haha, not a good look. She said not to worry about that, it's really fun and everyone works together, so I said that sounded fine to me and let's go for it. That was the last I heard.
Yesterday I got a text from one of the bridesmaids who asked about how the b-party planning was going. I said that I didn't know what was going on but the last update I had was the above, and she said she would reach out to MOH and get more info. Great! Thank you ladies!
A while later I get a text from the BM that says, "MOH said you told her you don't want to do the escape room because you have to climb up on top of things." Okay... 1. I said I was fine to do the escape room; 2. that stuff about climbing literally never was said, at all - we never had any kind of conversation at all about anything to do with climbing; and 3. I had no idea there was even any kind of climbing or physical activity involved. I spent a decent amount of time on the company's website and I didn't see any of the usual disclaimers about disabilities, proper attire, good health, etc. Granted, if the climbing thing is true then yes, it's probably not a good idea for me, but to make up a conversation out of nowhere is bizarre.
So BM says that MOH told her she was thinking of a trip to a local (non-hibachi) restaurant and going to play games at Dave and Buster's. Not sure if D&B is a nationwide chain but it's basically an arcade game sports bar. MOH and I went there together when we were coworkers, for a work outing. I had a good time and everything, but that was at 1pm on a weekday, not a Saturday night. Don't get me wrong - I love to (and frequently do) go to Buffalo Wild Wings and drink beer, eat wings, and watch football, but that's not really what I was going for with a big group of girls for my bachelorette. So at this point I'm a little peeved about the hibachi thing since that was the only thing I wanted and communicated very clearly, and disappointed about possibly spending the night in a place I wouldn't enjoy very much. AND I'm irritated because I don't like being the go-between and getting involved in the planning. It's super awkward for me.
So I told BM I wasn't sure about Dave and Buster's and rattled off a few other options MOH and I had discussed before, like a wine and paint night, going to a movie, having a girls' night in, etc. BM said she'd talk to her. OK GREAT.
I hear back from BM AGAIN (ARE YOU SERIOUS PLEASE STOP) and now, MOH says that I told her I didn't want to do a wine and paint night because my other friends did that for their bachelorette parties. What the crap? I specifically mentioned that as something I would love to do!!
I have NO IDEA why my MOH is lying and making up all this shit that I supposedly said to her. I don't know if maybe she just hasn't planned anything so is getting defensive and coming up with excuses (because my other BM's are super organized and have had the shower planned for several months), or she thinks all my ideas are lame and wants to plan something with herself in mind, or what. I'm extremely irritated by the bizarre lying and by being put in this awkward in between position where my bridesmaid is trying her best to help make it something more enjoyable for me without edging in over the MOH's plans.
I had more than enough so I told bridesmaid to please drop it and let MOH plan whatever the hell she wants. I don't care enough to continue getting involved. If nothing happens, then we're a go for impromptu hibachi night. If something gets planned, great, I will go graciously with a smile and do my best to have a wonderful time with the women who love me. Just please leave me alone about it!
Phew. That was a lot. Thanks for listening.