Invite wording, how to be polite?

ahoywedding

I'm not sure if this should go in here or the etiquette board, so please move if it's not appropriate.

We currently live in the same state as most of my FH's family, so we would like to have our ceremony & reception here (state A). However, I grew up in a different state (state , and have some family/friends there that would be unable to travel, so we plan to have a second reception or dinner of some sort there as well. 

Family and close friends will be invited to (but not expected to attend) both events. My question is, for people we are only inviting to the reception in state B, how do we convey on the invitation that the ceremony will take place on a different time/date? I thought about only including the RSVP card for the reception in state B, which would convey that pretty clearly, but then I wasn't sure what to do for the STDs.

kimmiinthemitten

ahoywedding said:

I'm not sure if this should go in here or the etiquette board, so please move if it's not appropriate.

We currently live in the same state as most of my FH's family, so we would like to have our ceremony & reception here (state A). However, I grew up in a different state (state , and have some family/friends there that would be unable to travel, so we plan to have a second reception or dinner of some sort there as well. 

Family and close friends will be invited to (but not expected to attend) both events. My question is, for people we are only inviting to the reception in state B, how do we convey on the invitation that the ceremony will take place on a different time/date? I thought about only including the RSVP card for the reception in state B, which would convey that pretty clearly, but then I wasn't sure what to do for the STDs.

How long will you have between both events?

I would invite everyone to the actual ceremony and reception and let them work out if they can or cannot travel.  Then for your wedding celebration party at your home state, you can send a separate invitation.  I wouldn't include it in your wedding invitations.    @CMGragain knows how to properly word that invitation.

ahoywedding

kimmiinthemitten said:

ahoywedding said:

I'm not sure if this should go in here or the etiquette board, so please move if it's not appropriate.

We currently live in the same state as most of my FH's family, so we would like to have our ceremony & reception here (state A). However, I grew up in a different state (state , and have some family/friends there that would be unable to travel, so we plan to have a second reception or dinner of some sort there as well. 

Family and close friends will be invited to (but not expected to attend) both events. My question is, for people we are only inviting to the reception in state B, how do we convey on the invitation that the ceremony will take place on a different time/date? I thought about only including the RSVP card for the reception in state B, which would convey that pretty clearly, but then I wasn't sure what to do for the STDs.

How long will you have between both events?

I would invite everyone to the actual ceremony and reception and let them work out if they can or cannot travel.  Then for your wedding celebration party at your home state, you can send a separate invitation.  I wouldn't include it in your wedding invitations.    @CMGragain knows how to properly word that invitation.

We are thinking of having no more than a few weeks between events, so there wouldn't really be time to send anything after the wedding saying "hey, we got married, come party with us!" I like the idea of inviting everyone to both and letting them decide.

Ghostie625

Could you spread the word via word of mouth that you'll be having a second party? Then you can still invite everyone to the actual wedding but at least they'll know they will have another chance to celebrate with you after if they can't make it.
I am in a similar situation in that FI and I are getting married in my hometown in my church (Catholic), but FI is Greek Orthodox so we're having a ceremony in the Greek church in his hometown later. FI's aunt has been spreading the word to his family, especially older relatives, that they'll be invited to this ceremony and small reception so they don't feel pressured to travel. (Of course they're being invited to the actual wedding, too.)
I would send a separate invitation since it is a separate event. If you ordered them ahead of time and had them ready to go you could mail them right after your wedding and still have enough time for people to get them and RSVP.

CMGragain

The pleasure of your company is requested

to celebrate the recent marriage of

Your Full Name

and

Husband's Full Name

Day, date

time o'clock

Venue

Address

City, State

Or, you can just use fill-in-the-blank party invitations from the drug store.  This is sent separately from your wedding invitation, after the ceremony, since it is simply a party, and it is not a part of your wedding. You may include information on your wedding website.

CMGragain

ahoywedding said:

kimmiinthemitten said:

ahoywedding said:

I'm not sure if this should go in here or the etiquette board, so please move if it's not appropriate.

We currently live in the same state as most of my FH's family, so we would like to have our ceremony & reception here (state A). However, I grew up in a different state (state , and have some family/friends there that would be unable to travel, so we plan to have a second reception or dinner of some sort there as well. 

Family and close friends will be invited to (but not expected to attend) both events. My question is, for people we are only inviting to the reception in state B, how do we convey on the invitation that the ceremony will take place on a different time/date? I thought about only including the RSVP card for the reception in state B, which would convey that pretty clearly, but then I wasn't sure what to do for the STDs.

How long will you have between both events?

I would invite everyone to the actual ceremony and reception and let them work out if they can or cannot travel.  Then for your wedding celebration party at your home state, you can send a separate invitation.  I wouldn't include it in your wedding invitations.    @CMGragain knows how to properly word that invitation.

We are thinking of having no more than a few weeks between events, so there wouldn't really be time to send anything after the wedding saying "hey, we got married, come party with us!" I like the idea of inviting everyone to both and letting them decide.

If you invite everyone to both, then you have to accept the fact that everyone might attend both.  This could get very expensive!  You cannot offer your guests a choice between two parties.  It is all, or nothing.