Dear Prudence,
My husband and I and are moving into a larger home with our children. We’d like a home with an in-law suite so his sixtysomething parents could live with us. We both adore his lovely mother (who is kind, hardworking, and practical) but are exasperated by his lazy, critical, spendthrift, alcoholic father. She has serious health problems and will likely die within 10 years, so we want her to have maximum access to her only grandchildren. Perversely, her husband is in good health and will likely live into his 90s based on family history. We don’t want to support him and suffer his insults for 30 years, especially once she is gone. Is there any way to set up a co-living situation just as long as she is alive?