day time wedding / timeline

knottier

Hi everyone, 
  Due to budget reasons we have decided on a Saturday daytime wedding.
It will be fully hosted with lunch provided and open bar. However our reception must be over by 4:00pm.

 I was wondering if you could suggest a timeline for the ceremony / reception that would be more convenient for people. I was thinking of starting the ceremony around 11:30am, so there would be more time for dancing/mingling. We are planning on a short ceremony (30-35min). However it does seems kind of early (we are planning to take pictures before the ceremony, in order not to have a gap).
I don't plan to have any speeches or personal dances, so the dance floor would open right after lunch. 

 I'm kind of worried about disappointing people with such a short event though, since more than 70% of our guests will be out of town (they will have to book plane tickets and hotels in order to attend). Our guest list is pretty short (about 50 people, half of them family) and I am worried that many of them will not want to spend all that money to come to an event that will be over by 4pm.
 We are in Chicago so there are definitely things they could do after the wedding, but I still think is a bit much to ask people to fly all the way here, and then just finish at 4pm.

  I guess what I am asking is what do you guys think about the timeline? Would you come to a wedding that would be over so early? Any suggestions to make this a more fun/ comfortable event for my guests? 
Thanks!

nerdwife

knottier said:

Hi everyone, 
  Due to budget reasons we have decided on a Saturday daytime wedding.
It will be fully hosted with lunch provided and open bar. However our reception must be over by 4:00pm.

 I was wondering if you could suggest a timeline for the ceremony / reception that would be more convenient for people. I was thinking of starting the ceremony around 11:30am, so there would be more time for dancing/mingling. We are planning on a short ceremony (30-35min). However it does seems kind of early (we are planning to take pictures before the ceremony, in order not to have a gap).
I don't plan to have any speeches or personal dances, so the dance floor would open right after lunch. 

 I'm kind of worried about disappointing people with such a short event though, since more than 70% of our guests will be out of town (they will have to book plane tickets and hotels in order to attend). Our guest list is pretty short (about 50 people, half of them family) and I am worried that many of them will not want to spend all that money to come to an event that will be over by 4pm.
 We are in Chicago so there are definitely things they could do after the wedding, but I still think is a bit much to ask people to fly all the way here, and then just finish at 4pm.

  I guess what I am asking is what do you guys think about the timeline? Would you come to a wedding that would be over so early? Any suggestions to make this a more fun/ comfortable event for my guests? 
Thanks!

I am also doing a Saturday afternoon weddings. Ours starts at 11:30 am and goes until 5:00 pm, so it's pretty similar. We're treating it just like an evening wedding - full meal, open bar, DJ, etc. I don't think an afternoon wedding is particularly strange or would somehow make OOT guests less likely to attend. 

For timeline, if you're using a professional photographer, I would reach out to him/her. I just had a long chat with my photographer to establish timeline. We're also doing a first look and pictures before the ceremony, so yes, it will be an early day. I'll have to be all but dressed by 7:00 that morning. Ceremony at 11:30, cocktail hour 12:00-1:00, then lunch, dancing, etc.

We didn't want everything to just be completely over at 5:00, so we found a hotel that has a bar and booked our wedding block there. This way, we can just tell people we're going to drink there, and do that. We're not hosting this part, though we may decide to order pizza or something for everyone for a late dinner (though we'd have to either do that in our suite or in the courtyard, which may not be possible in late October).

Hope that helps!

mntravelingmama

Can you plan an evening party either at your house or a family member's? It wouldn't have to be fancy, just a casual get together.

lembaslover

I wouldn't worry about people not thinking it's enough time. Ours was in the evening but didn't last any longer than yours. So for us OOT guests had to occupy themselves for the morning/afternoon and yours will have time in the evening.

If you want to keep hanging out with people and partying you could spread by word of mouth that you are going to be at X bar after the wedding hanging out. If you spread it by word of mouth then you don't need to host it and it's just whoever wants to keep hanging out can otherwise they can do their own thing. If you want to get something like pizzas later for guests you can but that's optional.

Or if you just want to go be alone with your new husband that is totally ok too! I'm sure most if not all of your guests will understand wanting some alone time!

Ghostie625

A typical reception (at least from what I've seen) is 5 hours. (1 hr cocktail hour plus 4 hours for dinner/dancing)
It looks like you're planning for a 4 hour reception which isn't that far off. If you want to extend it can you push the ceremony up to 10:30 then do your reception 11-4? That's still an appropriate time for lunch and then is no shorter than a typical evening reception, just earlier.

[Deleted User]

nerdwife said:

knottier said:

Hi everyone, 
  Due to budget reasons we have decided on a Saturday daytime wedding.
It will be fully hosted with lunch provided and open bar. However our reception must be over by 4:00pm.

 I was wondering if you could suggest a timeline for the ceremony / reception that would be more convenient for people. I was thinking of starting the ceremony around 11:30am, so there would be more time for dancing/mingling. We are planning on a short ceremony (30-35min). However it does seems kind of early (we are planning to take pictures before the ceremony, in order not to have a gap).
I don't plan to have any speeches or personal dances, so the dance floor would open right after lunch. 

 I'm kind of worried about disappointing people with such a short event though, since more than 70% of our guests will be out of town (they will have to book plane tickets and hotels in order to attend). Our guest list is pretty short (about 50 people, half of them family) and I am worried that many of them will not want to spend all that money to come to an event that will be over by 4pm.
 We are in Chicago so there are definitely things they could do after the wedding, but I still think is a bit much to ask people to fly all the way here, and then just finish at 4pm.

  I guess what I am asking is what do you guys think about the timeline? Would you come to a wedding that would be over so early? Any suggestions to make this a more fun/ comfortable event for my guests? 
Thanks!

I am also doing a Saturday afternoon weddings. Ours starts at 11:30 am and goes until 5:00 pm, so it's pretty similar. We're treating it just like an evening wedding - full meal, open bar, DJ, etc. I don't think an afternoon wedding is particularly strange or would somehow make OOT guests less likely to attend. 

For timeline, if you're using a professional photographer, I would reach out to him/her. I just had a long chat with my photographer to establish timeline. We're also doing a first look and pictures before the ceremony, so yes, it will be an early day. I'll have to be all but dressed by 7:00 that morning. Ceremony at 11:30, cocktail hour 12:00-1:00, then lunch, dancing, etc.

We didn't want everything to just be completely over at 5:00, so we found a hotel that has a bar and booked our wedding block there. This way, we can just tell people we're going to drink there, and do that. We're not hosting this part, though we may decide to order pizza or something for everyone for a late dinner (though we'd have to either do that in our suite or in the courtyard, which may not be possible in late October).

Hope that helps!

This would likely be my plan too (if I don't elope.)  

I'd totally come in from out of town for an afternoon wedding.  Did, in fact, for the wedding of a cousin last May.  We got together in the hotel bar every night with the family.  Post-partied in my uncle's room immediately after the reception, went to Buffalo Wild Wings for a late dinner with another group.  It was great!  I wouldn't worry too much about the length of the reception itself.  As long as you're mildly accessible other times and can have slightly longer conversations with the out-of-towners at other times, the length of the hosted party shouldn't make a difference.

thisismynickname2

I wouldn't worry about it being over by 4. Most receptions are only a few hours. We did ceremony at 6, cocktails 6:30-7:30, dinner 7:30-9, dancing till midnight. That's only an 1.5 hours longer than your plans--- and most people don't stay the whole time. Many people left mine around 10 or 11 pm depending on age and sitters or distance traveled. 

So, for you:
11:30 ceremony
12pm mingle/snacks
12:30 lunch
1:30 dance floor opens
Party till 4

Everyone does whatever they want later in the evening (and Saturday nights in Chicago are fun!). Plus, starting at 11:30am, I'd think people would have plenty of time to get to your venue. Most OOTers would come in Friday for a Saturday wedding anyway, usually. Or at least I would because I wouldn't want a delayed morning flight to affect an afternoon/evening schedule. 

Sounds like a great event to me!

knottier

  Thanks everyone for your responses, I'm glad that it doesn't seems too bad.
We live in a two bed apt, so I am not sure that we could fit everyone over at night, although I would like that idea + ordering pizza or something. 
I am leaning more towards going to a bar/ hotel. I am worried about either my mom or sister not making it to whatever we do at night, since my sister will come with my 3 nephews, which are little, and someone will need to stay with them. But I guess this would happen at any night time event.

  We are thinking of spending the night at a nice hotel, and offering our apt for some of our immediate family to stay in. So maybe we can have people over at the hotel bar.  I guess I will try to figure something along those lines, we really would like to host everything, but I don't think that we could afford to host the bar tab at night as well. Another option would be a breakfast with the family the next day, but that would also need to happen at a large place (there are like 20 family members) and I am not sure  we can afford to host all that, plus people will probably need to leave early the next day in order to work on Monday. 

At least I am glad to hear is not so strange to have a daytime wedding. I just want people to have a good time. Thanks again for replying! 

SP29

What you have planned so far is great! You do not have to plan anything else if you don't have the budget for it. 

If you wanted, and since you are staying at a hotel, you could let your guest know that you and your FI will be at the hotel bar at X time if anyone wants to drop by. Spread via word of mouth. In this case, you would not be on the hook for hosting, though your attendance number is likely to vary. 

ILoveBeachMusic

I wouldn't worry about your guests having things to do. Chicago has lots to do - they could even make a play if they want. That's the upside of Chicago as opposed to a small town with little going on for guests. DD was married in Chicago. Her evening reception went until 11:00 but really just a core group of her (and SIL) friends from HS, college and grad school stayed until the end. The ones that had small children (had sitters at home) left early as did the older folks. I think your timeline is fine.

STARMOON44

I'd prefer that you not have other events for me to attend honestly. I just want to go to your wedding and then enjoy the city!

lnixon8

Don't worry about breakfast the next day. Initially I wanted to do that but push came to shove and my budget/venue where I would have it wouldn't allow it. I am so glad- I was exhausted and it was one last thing to do and worry about.

What you have planned sounds great!

ETA: Wanted to add, make sure your VIPS know it's starting at 1030/11 so that anyone flying in knows to get there Friday if they would like to get get ready somewhere other than the airport

KnickerGold

lnixon8 said:

ETA: Wanted to add, make sure your VIPS know it's starting at 1030/11 so that anyone flying in knows to get there Friday if they would like to get get ready somewhere other than the airport

This!

Wanted to add-- I would be more than OK with a Saturday afternoon wedding if I was flying in- fly in Friday night, 1 night at a hotel and then fly out Saturday night after the wedding!
Saves me a night in a hotel, plus it's usually cheaper to 'return' on a Saturday vs. a Sunday when booking a RT ticket. PLUS I still have all day Sunday at home to do whatever needs doing (aka play with my dogs and horses) before I head back to work Monday!

MandyMost

I'd probably start at 11 instead of 11:30, so you can have a full cocktail hour. But that's just because I love cocktail hours, and one with mimosas and little brunchy snacks sounds fantastic.

11am ceremony
11:30 cocktail hour
12:30 lunch is served
1:30pm mingling and dancing
3:30pm bar closes
4pm everyone leaves

Pinksatin91016

I'm glad you started this thread because I find the input useful myself! I am getting married in my aunt's property in the state where most of my family is (PA) but my FI and I will be from OOT (IN). I was wanting an early evening wedding, like 5 or 6, but I think we're leaning earlier, like 1 pm, so guests who have a few hours drive (like from Upstate NY) don't need to stay in a hotel if they don't want. Also 3 or 4 isn't a proper meal time and we want to host a meal. That's why we're thinking 1 now but I'm still not sure. So then our reception should go until about 6 right?

lyndausvi

Pinksatin91016 said:

I'm glad you started this thread because I find the input useful myself! I am getting married in my aunt's property in the state where most of my family is (PA) but my FI and I will be from OOT (IN). I was wanting an early evening wedding, like 5 or 6, but I think we're leaning earlier, like 1 pm, so guests who have a few hours drive (like from Upstate NY) don't need to stay in a hotel if they don't want. Also 3 or 4 isn't a proper meal time and we want to host a meal. That's why we're thinking 1 now but I'm still not sure. So then our reception should go until about 6 right?

I've attended a ton of wedding that were in the afternoon.  Everyone had a full meal.   And a bar and dancing.

 Do most people eat a big meal at 3pm?  Not on a regular basis, but it's not entirely unheard of either.     Think holidays, tailgating, Sunday dinners at grandma's.    

My sister's ceremony was at 10:30am.  Reception was from noon-5. (catholic ceremony with a 20 min drive to the reception venue).    Full meal, open bar, dancing, etc.

1-6 sounds like a good time frame.

SP29

Pinksatin91016 said:

I'm glad you started this thread because I find the input useful myself! I am getting married in my aunt's property in the state where most of my family is (PA) but my FI and I will be from OOT (IN). I was wanting an early evening wedding, like 5 or 6, but I think we're leaning earlier, like 1 pm, so guests who have a few hours drive (like from Upstate NY) don't need to stay in a hotel if they don't want. Also 3 or 4 isn't a proper meal time and we want to host a meal. That's why we're thinking 1 now but I'm still not sure. So then our reception should go until about 6 right?

Since your reception is more than an hour or two, I would go with a full meal. Your guests might be leaning more toward lunch at that time (2pm? by the time the ceremony is over, travel, and any chit chatting in between- that is not a weird time for me to eat lunch on a "weekend"). 

Pinksatin91016

SP29 said:

Pinksatin91016 said:

I'm glad you started this thread because I find the input useful myself! I am getting married in my aunt's property in the state where most of my family is (PA) but my FI and I will be from OOT (IN). I was wanting an early evening wedding, like 5 or 6, but I think we're leaning earlier, like 1 pm, so guests who have a few hours drive (like from Upstate NY) don't need to stay in a hotel if they don't want. Also 3 or 4 isn't a proper meal time and we want to host a meal. That's why we're thinking 1 now but I'm still not sure. So then our reception should go until about 6 right?

Since your reception is more than an hour or two, I would go with a full meal. Your guests might be leaning more toward lunch at that time (2pm? by the time the ceremony is over, travel, and any chit chatting in between- that is not a weird time for me to eat lunch on a "weekend"). 

Thank you for your advice. I decided I actually want a rabbi to officiate instead of my FBIL (reasons like i can't have a more "real" wedding later and will probably regret not having an actual jewish wedding). The rabbi I'm talking to said he can't do that early on a Shabbat because he has morning services and such. Even 3 or 4 was too early, so I think now we're thinking about a 5, 5:30 or 6 start time. I will definitely be serving a meal though!

[edited because it posted without most of what I typed! for the second time! I think because I was on my iPad ]