I need help... I have four bridesmaids, but one of my bridesmaids has become progressively more and more of a nightmare.
She has tried to undermine almost all my decisions. She didn't like the dress I chose that everyone else agreed on, so she was determined to choose her own. She didn't like that I didn't include her two kids as flower girls (we're not having any young kids in the WP), and she went behind my back to purchase flower girl dresses for them and said she was just going to send them down the aisle whether I wanted them or not. She's made snide remarks and made “jokes” at my
expense. I’ve asked her to please stop as they make me uncomfortable and I’ve
also mentioned that, me being someone with clinical anxiety and depression, this
is most definitely not helpful.
My other bridesmaids have even told me
that she has been horrible about planning, but they delayed saying anything
because they didn’t want to upset me. She has shut them out of every discussion and lied and told them that I put her 100% in charge. She is also the only bridesmaid to have
not purchased her dress yet (they were all chosen in August and everyone else
ordered by November --we are less than three months from the wedding now). When I asked her if she could forward her order
confirmation to me for my records (as the other bridesmaids had already done),
everything went nuclear. She called me childish and said I had “no faith” in
her. She said I wasn’t a good friend and she feels like I’m nagging her. This
wasn’t my intention and I told her so with an apology and said I just wanted to
make sure she had her dress in time for the big day (other bridesmaids have
said it took anywhere from 8-15 weeks to get their dresses after ordering).
At what point is enough ENOUGH? I didn’t want to lose her
friendship, but now I’m struggling with how to handle this. She hasn't even acknowledged that she's done something wrong. Never in a million
years did I think I would be at the point of un-inviting one of my bridesmaids less than three months before the day. I just don’t see how either of us is going to
recover from this enough to be okay. Have I made a horrible misstep? Am I an
unconscious bridezilla? I’ve openly encouraged my bridesmaids to be honest with
me about something if they have a problem with it as I want everyone involved
to relax and enjoy themselves, so this has taken me quite by surprise.
What would you do? I'm afraid that this person is going to make a scene at my shower/bachelorette party/wedding and cause me more distress than it's worth. She's already driven me to the point of tears multiple times.