Okay, so I'm new to this so bear with me. I have a complicated situation. I'm getting married in about 5 months and I've chosen my bridesmaids already and they're in the process of ordering their dresses. I have my sister as MOH, my 3 best friends, and 2 sisters that live away that i've known my whole life. One of the sisters (let's call her Chelsea) has been a struggling alcoholic for a year now. When I asked her to be my bridesmaid in the fall, she had just come out of rehab and when I saw her she seemed to be better, focusing on herself and happy. She stayed at my house in December and things were good, we had fun and it was like it always was with her. She left just before Christmas to go be with her family, and she relapsed. Her family is odd and doesn't talk about her issues openly so I figured it was the stress of everything and she couldn't take it. She moved down to my city in the beginning of January, and on New Years Eve my fiancé had to drive to help her husband carry her inside their apartment because she had passed out from drinking outside. Fast forward to a couple weeks ago, we tried getting together a couple of times and every time she bailed, didn't reply in time, or it just never worked. I did end up seeing her once at the end of January, but with her having roommates we didn't get the chance to go over what had all happened with her over the holidays. I made plans with all my bridesmaids to go look for dresses at the end of February and the day before I finally got to sit down with Chelsea and talk about everything. I was concerned with her coming to the bachelorette and of course her own well-being. She assured me that we can all 'drink around her and she would be okay' even though i expressed that there would be alcohol, no doubt about it, but she still insisted she was good, everything was great. Now, a couple days ago I got a phone call from her mother (who lives out of province) that I needed to go pick her up, she was passed out again outside of her apartment and her husband was upset because they got in a fight. I am always there for my friends so of course I said I could get her. Long story short, without going into too much detail, it was a horribly sad night and she ended up escaping from my house at 6:30am and we couldn't find her anywhere because she had lost her phone. My fiancé left work and drove around the area because I had to take care of our son and called local police and hospitals worried sick about her. We ended up finding her after 3 1/2 hours when she borrowed a phone from someone and called her mom. Her father had driven 10 hours to come get her and she is now back in her hometown. I was told she got kicked out of her house and doesn't have a phone, although I've seen her "Like" posts on Facebook. I've already decided it's not in anyones best interest if she came to the bachelorette, it's too toxic for her and it would just put her in a bad place. My question is, should she still be a bridesmaid? She is practically my sister, but she lives away from me and lately with her situation I barely know her anymore. I don't want to send her over the edge by removing her as a bridesmaid, but others around me think it could help her in recovery by her seeing that her alcoholism caused her to mess things up so bad that she won't be in the wedding. I'm also unsure if she should attend the reception (due to wine at dinner and an open bar, and unless she has admitted to being an alcoholic and is serious, it would just be another toxic situation) She has been told that by the end of this week she needs to have her dress ordered, so I was planning on making a decision by then. I don't know if anyone has been through a situation like this? Please help, any advice will do.