Any ladies' husbands sport "girly" wedding bands?

SaintPaulGal

Hi all!

Our wedding is still over a year out, but my partner and I have recently been looking at wedding rings.  I kept throwing ideas out there but nothing was hitting home for him.  He didn't want something that wide or that plain or that engraved or that...undefined, but just not THAT one.  Then he saw a channel set baguette eternity ring and he was sold. 

We are not really into traditional, strict gender roles.  We are 20-something liberal, egalitarian folks in a progressive city.  I love the fact that he wants diamonds and isn't concerned with embodying stereotypical masculinity.  But I'm still a little worried about how others will react to my awesome, professionally-oriented sweetie with his dainty, sparkly little band. 

So reassure me.  Does anybody know a dude who unapologetically rocks a "ladylike" wedding band?

vturnipseed1

lol! This guy in my office has one. I've never seen his wife's ring. I thought it was a little flashy but I more respect how much he talks about how much he loves his wife and his marriage so I'm cool with it.

labro

I guess for me it would depend on what he does for a job? Like, I just wouldn't see a flashy wedding ring really fitting in say at a job that involves getting dirty, a lot of physical labor, etc. My H wears a band that has a thin strip of diamonds in it but something like a channel set baguette ring would be too much for him and just wouldn't work well with the things he enjoys (woodworking, hobby building, stuff like that).

Regardless, if it suits him and his personality I say go for it. My only limitation personally would be if I were in a job where I would almost never get to wear my wedding ring because I'd be worried about wear and tear on something super elaborate and flashy.

ThxSugar

I think if he loves it and feels good with it on, then he should rock it. Haters be damned. 

madamerwin

Eh, I doubt that many people would notice/judge his choice of wedding band, especially if you live in a progressive city. If he is happy with it, I say he should get whatever he wants.

One other option, though: If he is in to diamond bands, and if he is concerned about the ring being too feminine, a lot of jewelers make men's bands with diamonds....

Like this:



And this:

justsie

I'd judge a over the top engagement ring before I'd judge a man wearing a ring that isn't "manly"- I don't think of rings as coming in genders though. With the man's ring its more likely that he picked it out himself, it is something that he likes. With and engagement ring there is a chance that the woman had no say in it, so when I see something over the top I always wonder if she had say or if he missed the mark.

MesmrEwe

My BIL has more of a "frilly" guy's ring.  The important thing is that he likes it.  Secondary is what he does for a job as many professions require either a plain band or no jewelry while at work (one look at what happens when a ring catches and does to a finger), but that factor also applies to women, so consider this for both of you!!!  (Medical & Food professions are the big ones for plain bands and a number of professions out there don't allow them at all)

JediElizabeth

SaintPaulGal said:

Hi all!

Our wedding is still over a year out, but my partner and I have recently been looking at wedding rings.  I kept throwing ideas out there but nothing was hitting home for him.  He didn't want something that wide or that plain or that engraved or that...undefined, but just not THAT one.  Then he saw a channel set baguette eternity ring and he was sold. 

We are not really into traditional, strict gender roles.  We are 20-something liberal, egalitarian folks in a progressive city.  I love the fact that he wants diamonds and isn't concerned with embodying stereotypical masculinity.  But I'm still a little worried about how others will react to my awesome, professionally-oriented sweetie with his dainty, sparkly little band. 

So reassure me.  Does anybody know a dude who unapologetically rocks a "ladylike" wedding band?

If this is your only worry, forget it. There's so much pain in this world from people telling others what they should like or who they should be, and it's all stupid. If your husband likes something that some jeweler (or marketer, or socialite) called "feminine" decades ago, he should get it. And fuck that jeweler for trying to put your husband or anyone else in a box.

CMGragain

Remember, prior to WWII, most men didn't wear wedding rings at all!  This is one of those traditions that has changed with the times.
Another old tradition is that men shouldn't wear diamonds.  That one is gone, too.
Do what makes you happy.  If anyone criticizes, they are out of line.

SaintPaulGal

Thanks to everyone who took the time to read and reply! 

Fortunately, his job doesn't have any constraints on the sort of ring he could wear.  It’s a bit more active than a typical desk job; he does the technical production for corporate events, so there is a fair bit of carrying cases of things and setting up equipment.  But there is nothing that would be hazardous about wearing a more prominent ring, nor anything dirty or extraordinarily hard on his hands. 

I guess I was just having a moment worrying about people being really mean to him.  He’s not emotionally fragile enough to be shredded by that, and it’s his choice to make anyway, but I just hate the thought of the symbol of our love being a source of ridicule for him.  I really appreciate the support from everyone.  You all are completely right.  It’s his ring, his hand, his body, his life…if someone judges his choice of ring, well, phooey on them. 

I ordered a replica ring for him to try and see what he thought, and when it came this weekend…well, I think that’s in the top 5 list of the most excited moments I have seen from him over our 4 years together.  And not that it matters, but it actually looks less feminine on his finger than I had expected.  I am so thrilled that we are each going to have a ring that we love so much!  And I am honored to be with someone who is not afraid to unabashedly be who he is!

msuprincess04

DH wears a ring with a large marquis sapphire (set horizontally). So, a little feminine, but it's very him. 

kimmiinthemitten

I googled your description and I don't think it looks particularly feminine. I think I actually like it better than the traditional male diamond bands. There's something architectural about the baguettes. 

kvruns

SaintPaulGal said:

Thanks to everyone who took the time to read and reply! 

Fortunately, his job doesn't have any constraints on the sort of ring he could wear.  It’s a bit more active than a typical desk job; he does the technical production for corporate events, so there is a fair bit of carrying cases of things and setting up equipment.  But there is nothing that would be hazardous about wearing a more prominent ring, nor anything dirty or extraordinarily hard on his hands. 

I guess I was just having a moment worrying about people being really mean to him.  He’s not emotionally fragile enough to be shredded by that, and it’s his choice to make anyway, but I just hate the thought of the symbol of our love being a source of ridicule for him.  I really appreciate the support from everyone.  You all are completely right.  It’s his ring, his hand, his body, his life…if someone judges his choice of ring, well, phooey on them. 

I ordered a replica ring for him to try and see what he thought, and when it came this weekend…well, I think that’s in the top 5 list of the most excited moments I have seen from him over our 4 years together.  And not that it matters, but it actually looks less feminine on his finger than I had expected.  I am so thrilled that we are each going to have a ring that we love so much!  And I am honored to be with someone who is not afraid to unabashedly be who he is!

do you have a link to this style? I'm still having a hard time picturing what it is

SaintPaulGal

kvruns said:

do you have a link to this style? I'm still having a hard time picturing what it is

For those who are wondering, the ring in question looks like this:

chibiyui

That ring is fine. 

At an old company event a coworker from a different store had a diamond wedding band. His was actually because it was on clearance, but still. If he likes it he likes it.

bohobrideCA

My FI's last boss was a jeweler that he worked for for many years so he's into jewelry more than the average guy. He wears a yellow gold ring with rows of black and white diamonds on his right hand everyday. He wants the Cartier LOVE ring in rose gold for his wedding band and I told him I would also get him an engagement ring if he wanted (it's only fair) his only requirements were that it's rose gold like mine and no opals or aquamarines. I really like his style and it's kind of a turn on that he's confident enough to roll his eyes when something is described as not "masculine". 

SP29

That is a nice band! For what it's worth, I don't think it looks "feminine"- it has strong lines. Not that that really matters, I think anyone could wear it- it's just a nice ring!

If he likes it, he'll rock it.

My DH is a bit more conservative with his style, so he would not wear a band with diamonds. But he doesn't really wear jewelry period- his wedding band, his iron ring, and a watch (though he does like watches). Even still, when we bought his wedding band, he wanted a thinner band. Because he is not used to wearing jewelry, he preferred less metal- less to feel on his finger. Whatever works!