Monday

Swazzle

@futuremrshistorian - Your niece and nephew are too cute!

@eilis1228 - That quilt looks awesome! You and @audrewuh are so talented. I hope your day improves and I hope your H is ok!

AlPacina

@swazzle – What are your Shonda shows?

@caseface5 – That’s so sad that you’re so sensitive to balloons! Is there a certain event that got you feeling that way about them? TBH, I haven’t been around fireworks since my absolutely terrible 4th of July experience last year (I get anxiety just remembering!), so I hope I’m still able to enjoy them the same way. I have a feeling I’ll be pretty on edge.

@PamBeesly524 - That bear is such a great present! You obviously put a lot of thought into it!

@futuremrshistorian – Your nephew has such swagger! What a cutie!

@eilis1228 – OMG, your poor H! Every time I almost get into an accident thanks to some idiot I spend some time pondering how I could make public transit work, haha.

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Seriously, my brain can't comprehend Easter at all. I wrote last week about continuously forgetting and trying to make plans with people for Sunday. Well Sunday morning I already had gotten a couple of "Happy Easter!" texts, and then when I saw a bunch of cars at my neighbor's house, I was like "Must be someone's BIRTHDAY!" . . . smh.

Friday night I cleaned the house, and then Saturday morning my BF's dad came over. We went to the beer and wine festival and I felt SO MUCH BETTER than past years since I avoided drinking wine the whole day. I missed it and yearned for it, but my stomach can't handle mixing alcohols like that. I brought home some awesome roasted nuts, flavored peanut butter that I'm gonna use for cooking, some marinades, and a shit ton of free coasters.

I finally had a little bit of sunshine on Sunday morning to do some yard work. And that was followed up by plenty of sunshine but also torrential rain at the same time. It was an interesting day. We're finally almost finished with the newest season of House of Cards and it's epic.

ETA: Clarifying words

PamBeesly524

@AlPacina What were your favorite beers that you tried at the festival?! I'm always looking for new stuff.

Swazzle

@AlPacina - I watch Grey's, Scandal, and usually at 10 it's How to Get Away with Murder but that ended last week and this week they premiered The Catch which I really liked a lot. The beer and wine festival sounds like so much fun! 

AlPacina

@labro - I just checked the news and saw Gov. Deal vetoed that horrendous bill! That's so exciting! Do you think the state legislature will keep trying? What are local news sources saying?

MissKittyDanger

@futuremrshistorian  such cuties!!

@eilis1228 oh jeez! Hope he's okay and I hope your mood improves


So I just got the news that while I'm at another office weekly, I'm suppose to go through the tax files to be sure they're tidy and set up to go.
Apparently the files our head office gets from our office are super nice and organized.

Uhm ... yay? XD

AlPacina

@PamBeesly524 - I really enjoyed Lompoc Strong Draft, which they nicknamed LSD, and two different places had beer with blood orange flavors. I really hope blood orange becomes a thing, because I was DIGGING IT.

Do you have Lompoc over there? I think they're based in Portland, but I've never bought it at a store or anything.

[Deleted User]

@AlPacina - Now Gov. Deal needs to veto the campus carry bill that's still sitting on his desk.  

Also, I totally feel you on the "cannot mix alcohols" thing.  I've never been able to mix liquor and wine/beer, but now I can't mix wine and beer.  I typically just drink wine, because, while I LOVE BEER, I don't drink it very often and it feels like a rock sitting in my stomach.  :-( 

jenna8984

@alpacina There's a local radio segment that I DIE at each week. The host lives in this really wealthy town here in MA, where crime is like 0% so they read the police logs from the prior week and make a satire about how dangerous the town is. These are the funniest police calls you'll ever hear. Tuesday- 2pm- man called to report a raccoon was under his car.  Wednesday 4pm- a woman called to report her neighbor's dog barked at her dog. I've been listening for months and they've NEVER had anything related to actual crimes. So last week, one of them was a report that an unknown car was parked at their neighbor's house. (like what the hell, your neighbor isn't allowed to have a guest over?! you automatically assume it's a break-in?). So you forgetting Easter cracked me up because all I could imagine was that person here calling the cops like "My street is FULL of unknown cars!!" hahahahahahh

AlPacina

@jenna8984 - Omg, that segment sounds insanely hilarious! I think I would love it, especially with my small town low crime background. I definitely have a neighbor that wouldn't surprise me if she decided to "check in" on someone with a strange car at their house.

One local station has a show where someone can be confused as to why they didn't get a second date with a person, so the show calls that person and asked them questions about why they didn't want to go out again. A recent one was a girl who slept with a guy, and he stayed the night, but then she had a dream where he killed her or something so she kicked him out when she woke up and never talked to him again. HAHA! That poor guy!

PamBeesly524

@AlPacina I've never heard of it but I'm loving the surge of citrus in new brews so I feel like I'd really dig the blood orange too.

@jenna8984 What station is this?! Could I hear it in Boston? Must. Listen.

labro

@AlPacina Yeah. I've been listening to a couple of things this morning. Most of what's being broadcast is relief that he didn't sign...but then you get a few people saying that they are attacking Christians and Christians are the ones who will suffer, blah blah blah. I'm like STFU, your rights are already protected under the 1st Amendment sooooo get over yourselves!

@futuremrshistorian ...I feel like it's less likely he will. I guess college students need to bring Tasers and stuff on campus with them now too. What in the actual fuck is wrong with the legislature???

[Deleted User]

@labro - I agree; I don't think he'll veto it either.  What's doubly frustrating is that the majority of my students don't want it!  We talked about it and the general consensus was "Campus Carry is a stupid and dangerous idea and we don't want it to pass."  It's just ludicrous to me that I can, if I want to, ban cell phones, laptops, and any number of other things from my classroom...but I won't be able to ban concealed weapons?!

labro

@futuremrshistorian The only thing that reassures me (from personal experience anyway) is that the people I know who have bothered to go through the process of getting a concealed carry license are responsible gun owners. They aren't the ones who are going in to a classroom or a mall or anywhere else and murdering a bunch of innocents. It's the only thing that keeps my hope alive that this bill won't do anything actually dangerous.

[Deleted User]

@labro - Exactly.  Actually, a high percentage of my students are military, since I teach at a campus that serves a major Army post.  I trust them!

jenna8984

@pambeesly524 oh definitely! WAAF out of Brighton (107.3) It's called Stow 5-0 and it's on Thursdays at 7:30am. I generally don't like the host and don't listen at any other time but I never miss that segment lol

AlPacina

It's kind of quiet today, so I guess I'll ask some advice:

I make more money than my BF, so we evenly split our mortgage payment, and I take care of the other house bills. We're split pretty closely on groceries most months. But, I'm also way more willing to spend money on doing things for myself, like trips, clothes, and show tickets (mostly show tickets, haha). Honestly, I'll ask my BF if he wants to go to things with me, and a lot of the time he'll say yes but doesn't really think to pay me back for his half of the cost. Sometimes it's more expensive than he realizes, but I'd rather pay for him than go alone.

We were talking about our savings yesterday and he has DOUBLE what I have recuperated since we bought our house. It's an intense difference! As long as I'm still putting money in savings, do I need to be worried that I'm not saving as much as him? Are any of you girls in a saver/spender relationship? I don't really know what I'm afraid of. I'm having fun right now, but I also want to do my part.

labro

@AlPacina It seems to me that he's saving more because you're taking on more of the burden for living expenses, activities, etc. And I guess I don't blame him for not paying you back on the activities, since it seems like you ask him to go and you never ask him to share the cost with you. TBH, H paid for a lot of things when we'd go out - gas, dinner, stuff like that. We'd share the cost of some things like expensive show tickets, but general just going out he'd typically cover the cost and I didn't even think about it.

I'm not 100% sure what your question is about you not doing your part? Do you  mean doing your part to save money?

I guess my questions are -
Do you have an emergency fund? Is it enough to say...cover a hypothetical emergency that would cost you $1000? If it isn't, then you definitely are not saving enough and need to focus less on fun things and more on saving for a period of time.

Do you have any debt? I can't remember if I've ever seen you talk about student loan debt for example.

Personally, I think it's ok to have certain priorities right now like going to shows, going on vacation, having a good time....as long as you are still staying within your means, you have an emergency fund, and you're paying your other bills.

eilis1228

@AlPacina I make significantly less than H, and he's definitely a penny pincher. I normally go over my monthly discretionary budget/allowance, and if not for him, my savings and debt would be less than stellar. My H's rule of thumb is to have 6 months of expenses in a savings account in case something crazy happens. He's also really intense about paying off credit cards each and every month-- he haaaaates debt of any kind. Basically, once you have 6 months of savings and can comfortably pay off any debt each month, then do what you want with your money. Re: H's car wreck-- he keeps saying that one of the downsides to all these wrecks is that he can't get a new car out of it. Such a goober. If our city had better public transportation, he'd be all over it.

@Swazzle *blushes* Thank you! I don't feel crazy talented, but I'm still really new to the hobby. For me, it's the equivalent of coloring-- just a nice way to unwind but still keep my mind and my hands busy. I really like creating something out of nothing. @audrewuh is a great teacher-- SHE'S the talented one!

@MissKittyDanger Thank you! He's OK, just really frustrated.

@jenna8984 Easter was definitely a success! It was so easy to host too since I made it a potluck. It also helped with leftovers because everyone took home what they brought.

AlPacina

@labro - I have no extra debt other than my car and house, and I have 4 months of paychecks in savings. I am proud of my savings, especially considering I spent most of it on our down payment.

I feel like once we get married we'll make more of an effort to combine finances. We've talked about it already, and it seems like the route we both want to take. So my worry is that if we do he'll be putting in twice as much to our savings, and I'll feel guilty that I won't have as much to contribute.

jenna8984

@alpacina I honestly don't think that sounds like a big deal. You guys are building a future together and will essentially be your money as a couple. As long as he looks at it that way, and isn't like "fuck you- this is MINE". That I'd say is a problem.

Our picture is pretty similar but I am the one with the savings. I make more, so H has a set "rent" amount that goes direct deposit from his paycheck into my checking account each week. This amount is mortgage+electric+water+groceries+cable /2. Then we each pay for our cars on our own and whatever spending on our own. Well since I make more, after those bill are paid, I put a large chunk in savings and my H doesn't have any leftover for savings. But even though I'm technically the one putting it in savings, we consider it both of our money. We pay all vacations out of it, we pay house maintenance out of it, emergencies, etc. We just consider me to be the account manager because I'm better with money. I mean people might think it's weird that he doesn't have his own savings account with equal amount but we don't see the need.

labro

@AlPacina I just don't think it's something I'd worry about then. You have a healthy e-fund (4 months is excellent!) If you REALLY wanted to focus on savings, I'd work on getting rid of your car loan right now before amping up the savings...but I think you're doing great.

Does your BF have a car loan? Student loans? If he doesn't have loans (other than his part of the mortgage) then it makes even more sense to me how he's able to stash more money away. I think you guys are doing great! You don't have to go into a marriage with 100% equal amount of savings. If it's something that is really bothering you, I feel like there's never anything wrong with a good budget discussion so you can both talk about your goals, how you spend, all of that.

AlPacina

@jenna8984 - It sounds like you and your H have the right idea! Sometimes one of us will make a big purchase that will benefit both of us because "it's our money, anyway." I'm hoping he realizes that "our money" is going to continue to buy broadway tickets for the rest of "our lives"! Haha!

@labro - I really appreciate your assurance and advice. He has nothing bad to say about the amount of money I have, I just wasn't aware he had so much more until yesterday! I always appreciate your willingness to discuss this kind of stuff.

PamBeesly524

I'm in a similar situation as @jenna8984 except we have a joint checking account, so all of our money funnels into one place. I make more than H at the moment but he is more of the financial guy so he tracks it all in Quickbooks, etc. We're also really similar when it comes to spending habits so that helps as well.

@AlPacina it sounds like you guys communicate fairly well about how you want to handle your money so I definitely wouldn't worry about it!

jenna8984

@alpacina some of my savings and investment accounts don't allow a joint person on the account so I just make sure he's the beneficiary so he has access to it all if anything happens to me.

eilis1228

AuroraRose41

So uh hi everyone! Things have been insane this month and I have no idea where the time went, but I have lurked every once in a while and also have been trying to keep up with your lives. I am still around and thinking about all of you though! 

I might have to do a super belated Kauai trip report, because it was amazing and I can't wait to share everything with you. And unfortunately I have to be vague for now, but I have some really exciting news to share as well once everything is finalized. I am hoping that everything gets set in stone by the end of this week, so I can then tell all of you. All of that being said, I promise that I am not pregnant. That's all I can say for now, and just wanted to pop in and say I missed all of you!