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Wedding Etiquette Forum

Save the date sent for now separated couple

Okay, so firstly I've kinda already 'done' this so not sure if I'm looking for validation or am just interested to hear your opinions.

I am inviting some of my dad's family to our wedding in July.  As they are from England I sent save the dates. I sent one to Dad's Cousin and Dad's Cousin's Wife (and kids).  I had to look up her name on Facebook to address the invite as I have not really met her (although I did go to their wedding about 18 years ago).

I got a text from Dad's Cousin asking if he could change the name of his guest.  I said yes straight away, thinking at first that his wife could not attend as she couldn't get time off work or whatever.  I just said, no problem, just let me know who you are bringing for the table plan.  It turns out they have separated and he is bringing his new GF.  I have no judgement on this btw.

My question is, have I unintentionally 'uninvited' Dad's cousin's wife?  Or does it not matter as I have never met her and only placed her on the invite as the SO of a guest.

It would be great to hear your thoughts!

Re: Save the date sent for now separated couple

  • In addition, if I had met her I would probably send her an invite with a plus one, but that seems weird as I don't know her.
  • Would you have invited her if she were not married to your Dad's cousin? I'm thinking probably not. She is not uninvited, per se, since she was part of that social unit and is no longer. You're in the clear etiquette-wise.
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  • No, you don't have to send her a separate invitation. And like Allie said, you haven't uninvited her just b/c Uncle chooses not to bring her. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • SP29SP29 member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited April 2016
    Agreed- she was invited because she was part of a social unit. She is no longer part of that social unit, so you do not owe her an invitation. Different if you did know her and considered her your aunt, regardless of marriage or not.

    And correct that your uncle should be allowed to bring his new GF- as that is who his SO is.
  • ScottishSarahScottishSarah member
    500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments First Answer
    edited April 2016
    Thanks girls.  Btw he is not my uncle, he is dad's cousin.

    Glad to know I'm not doing anything rude.  
  • Hahaha! No idea why I called him your uncle. Sorry. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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