Who did you take dress shopping?

JediElizabeth

I just set up my first appt at Alfred Angelo next month, and my mom, FMIL, and MOH are coming. 

I have 2 men in my bridal party, one of whom likes shopping with me, as well as another local female BM, and a local female friend in the groom's half of the party. So, up to 3 others who I would like to shop with. My mom is not cool with having a straight guy come to an appt., even though I shop with him all the time and we've been talking about dress shopping for me together for years.  

I want to try on some Maggie Sottoro dresses, too, so I'm going at least twice.  I'm not sure if I have to take my mom every time I go (she lives 90 min away and doesn't drive), or if I can go  with some bridal party members to some appts, and my mom to others. (FMIL lives 6 hours drive away, so she's just coming this once.)  

What did you all do?

(Edited for clarity. Which may still be lacking.)

kvruns

I went twice - first time with my mom and grandma, mostly just because grandma was in town and we thought it would be fun. Then I went the 2nd time with my mom and my best friend/MOH. Had grandma not been in town it would have just been mom and MOH.

Only you know if you "have" to take your mom each time. I'd definitely keep the list on the smaller side because too many people and opinions can make it difficult. Just pick the few who you really want there and value their opinion. You can always send pix to those who don't attend if they are interested. I've never been asked to go dress shopping for a wedding I've been in and have never felt left out for not being asked to go.

pinupbride6189

I went with my mom, sister, and one of my BMs. My sister was also shopping for her wedding dress, so we were there for ourselves and each other if that makes sense? I agree that keeping it on the smaller side is best, but I also think that if you want your male friend there, and he wants to be there, he should be regardless of what your mom thinks.

SP29

Up to you who you ask to attend each appointment- this is a personal appointment, so there are no requirements on who you have to or shouldn't invite.

I'd say if you want your guy friend there, invite him.

I only went shopping once. Brought 5 friends with me (yes- a bit much looking back- though 2 left early), as my mom or bff couldn't be there (OOT). I wanted opinions because I am VERY indecisive, but fortunately my friends are all very reasonable and not pushy. Turned out well.

I would recommend a smaller group, but invite whom you WANT there, not who you think needs to be there.

OurWildKingdom

We're going this weekend, and as of right now, it's just FW, one of our local BMs, and me. My Mom and SIL are invited, but I don't know yet whether they'll be coming. FMIL and two BMs are out of state, and the other local BMs have commitments.

ernursej

I went twice. The first appointment included my Mom, FMIL and my sister. It was too much for me. The second appointment I just brought my Mom as she is the person who I shop best with.

I think it is a personal decision but I haven't met too many people wishing they had brought more people with them ... usually the opposite.

CMGragain

Don't take an entourage.  Their opinions will confuse you, and not all shops have room for a lot of people.  Take the most important people - like your Mom?  I went with my daughter to choose her dress.  When I was a bride, I went by myself.
If you have been watching SYTTD, forget about it.  Your shopping experience will be nothing like that so called "reality" show.

bleve0821

I took my mom, dad, MOH, and FMIL, and I thought that was a huge party, although no one really had any wild opinions and they are all pretty relaxed people.  If I could do it again, I would take the same people.  I wanted them all there, but my MOH was the only one who really knew before I did I had found "The One."  Everyone thought I looked great in almost everything.  She was the one who recognized the difference in my demeanor when I walked out in the last dress.  Not sure if I would have gotten the dress I did if she hadn't been there to say, "Of all the dresses you tried on, your smile was the biggest when you tried that one on."

littlemushroom

I went twice. First time was my mom, sister and BFF. Second time was the first three plus my FMIL and FSIL. I didn't have any problems with anyone either time. They were all there to support what I wanted, not push their own agenda. I do know my mom would have been crushed if I ever went shopping without her for my dress. She really wanted to be there when I found "the one".

climbingsingle

I took my mom, my MIL, my MOH and another close girlfriend. I went only once. 

JaxInBlue

I went with my mom, my now-MIL, my godmother and my sister/MOH, who pulled double duty as my dress consultant.  That was enough people for me.  My mom, godmom and MIL were no help - they liked everything.  My sister was the one who was critical-in-a-good-way.  But there was also no way I was going without my mom.

Keeping in mind I only had one appointment, and found my dress at that one appointment, if I were you I would probably make the first appointment to those you have invited.  Then, if/when youmake your second appointment, given that it sounds harder for your mom and FMIL to attend, I would invite male friend and MOH, maybe the other local people.  If you find a great Maggie dress, you could always make a second appointment to bring your mom and/or FMIL and make the purchase at that appointment.

I agree a lot with PPs.  I think I brought the right number of people for me, but I also sometimes think I would have had the same great experience with only my mom and sister.  I would absolutely err on the side of fewer people, and maybe ask your shopping friend for help with your rehearsal or shower dress instead?

JediElizabeth

Thanks, everyone! 

I called my mom this morning, and she tells me I'm stressing too much about who wants to be there, and that I should concentrate on who I want to be there. She also told me in no uncertain terms that although I can try on as many dresses as I want, she does not want to go to a million appointments. Which is good, because I'd like to go with her the first time, and maybe the last, but shopping with my mom is not generally a fun time - she has great opinions, but she doesn't like crowds and gets annoyed at sales consultants easily. 

I like @JaxInBlue's suggestion: I'll set up another time to try on dresses with 2-4 people from the bridal party who I usually shop with, and if I find the one, I'll have my mom come back to see it with me. If not, repeat until I find something I want to show her.

charlotte989875

I had 5 appointments in two days, and it was a lot. I only had my mom with me. If you can spread it out, I would. By the third appointment in the day I was exhausted and stressed. I had to go back a second time to be sure it was the one. 

JediElizabeth

charlotte989875 said:

I had 5 appointments in two days, and it was a lot. I only had my mom with me. If you can spread it out, I would. By the third appointment in the day I was exhausted and stressed. I had to go back a second time to be sure it was the one. 

THAT I have covered at least! I'm planning to order a dress in July or August (8-9 mos out), simply because I couldn't see myself having the stamina for an appointment more than once every week or two! 

londinium215

I went once in my hometown with my mom and my aunt just after I got engaged, because I'm very close with my aunt but she won't be able to make it to my wedding; this was a way for me to include her, and she was really happy about it. It was less about looking for a dress and more about doing something with her. 

I then went on my own time by myself to a couple of shops where I live and narrowed it down to two shops and a few dresses. 

The next time my parents came to visit, I made appointments at those two shops (on two different days) and my mom, dad, and FMIL all came to both appointments and helped me finalise my choice. 

Now that I'm at the fitting stage, my FMIL came to my first fitting, is coming to my second, and then my MOH is flying in the morning of my third so she'll come with me to that. 

whitney37354

I went once & took my mom & fiance.  I think the more people you take, the worse it will be.  Too many opinions!

tigerlily6

Like @CMGragain, I went solo. Went to one store in (DB -- I know they get some flack, but they were closest to me), out of serendipity it turned out they were having their semi-annual sale. I not only found the style dress I'd been daydreaming about online, bu it looked amazing on me, much to my shock (usually the looks I like the most online turn out not to be so flattering on me in reality), and the one they had there on the rack fit me perfectly. 

I admit it was a bit lonely and the vendor fussed a great deal over me highlighting that it was odd for the bride to be shopping by herself. But in the end, it all worked out perfectly and in retrospect it was nice to have only one opinion to base my decision off of -- my own. 

ei34

I was pretty sure that the dress I ended up buying was "the one", I'd just wanted to try it on and be sure I liked it as much as I had on the 5'10 100lb model   one of my sisters came along with me as a second opinion.  My mom and other sister were peeved at the time that they weren't there (I hate shopping and don't like going wedding dress shopping with others, so I didn't think to invite my whole tribe), but I made sure to let them know when my dress came in and they had fun coming along for the fittings. 

kvruns

tigerlily6 said:

Like @CMGragain, I went solo. Went to one store in (DB -- I know they get some flack, but they were closest to me), out of serendipity it turned out they were having their semi-annual sale. I not only found the style dress I'd been daydreaming about online, bu it looked amazing on me, much to my shock (usually the looks I like the most online turn out not to be so flattering on me in reality), and the one they had there on the rack fit me perfectly. 

I admit it was a bit lonely and the vendor fussed a great deal over me highlighting that it was odd for the bride to be shopping by herself. But in the end, it all worked out perfectly and in retrospect it was nice to have only one opinion to base my decision off of -- my own. 

a friend did the same thing. I think she knew the sale was going on and the dress she wanted was on sale for just another day or two so she went herself, liked it and bought it without so much as a picture to anyone. Totally fine.