Receiving line vs. table visits

OurWildKingdom

In my game thread, @MandyMost made me think of the timeline for the reception, and I was wondering which would be better to do: a receiving line or table visits? If it helps, we have 100 guests and staff and our venue is very informal. Personally I like the idea of greeting guests as they arrive because it'll keep me from being too nervous, but I'm not sure about the logistics.

CMGragain

Usually the couple is having photos taken while the reception is beginning.  Either option is acceptable.  Formal receiving lines are usually done after the ceremony.  This works well for large weddings, and insures that everyone is greeting by the hosts and bridal couple.  Table visits are fine for smaller weddings, but if there are a lot of guests, this takes more time.

ShesSoCold

I prefer table visits because there's an awkwardness (for me) with waiting in a line to talk to B&G and it always feels rushed.

But table visits only really work if you're having assigned seating and a designated meal time, which, forgive me if I'm confusing you for another user, are not, correct?

I went to a wedding once where the receiving line was immediately after the ceremony - instead of a big processional, the couple kind of dismissed the guests row by row, starting at the front and working their way back. I thought that was nice.

SP29

We had a receiving line out of our ceremony (72 guests). Didn't take long at all. We also had time in between courses to do a few table visits.

I have occasionally seen receiving lines into the reception, both as before the cocktail hour starts and the B&G run off to do photos, or into the reception for dinner.

OurWildKingdom

ShesSoCold said:

I prefer table visits because there's an awkwardness (for me) with waiting in a line to talk to B&G and it always feels rushed.

But table visits only really work if you're having assigned seating and a designated meal time, which, forgive me if I'm confusing you for another user, are not, correct?

I went to a wedding once where the receiving line was immediately after the ceremony - instead of a big processional, the couple kind of dismissed the guests row by row, starting at the front and working their way back. I thought that was nice.

Correct, we may have assigned tables but will not have assigned seats. We're doing a buffet immediately after the ceremony.

ShesSoCold

Oh so I was wrong. Then table visits sound great!

ernursej

I always prefer weddings that have table visits. I appreciate not having to wait in line for a 2 second handshake and a "thank you for coming". With a table visit, I feel like I get a bit more time to say hello and it doesn't feel forced. Since you have assigned tabled and a meal, I would go with table visits.

kvruns

We did a receiving line (just us, no family members or WP) and then also did some table visits too since we wanted to talk to people more. Because you are having a more casual affair and want to have games and stuff I'd be worried that if you don't do the receiving line (or dismiss rows type of thing) you might miss some guests because they could be away from the table playing a game when you get to their section.

Edit: I typically hate receiving lines too but was afraid we might miss people with table visits and we hoped that doing it with just us vs the whole WP and family would make it go faster and less awkward with people. The downside was you just get the quick hello/congrats and not a conversation but I still don't feel like we got a ton of conversation in at a table visit since you're moving to each one.

lnixon8

table visits. As a guest I'd prefer to get to a cocktail hour instead of waiting in line to say hi.

InLoveInQueens

I voted table visits because as a guest I much prefer them, though the last wedding I went to did table visits but the couple split up and the groom greeted his friends/family and the bride greeted hers so I never got to say a single word to the groom, which I really didn't like. I wanted to at least congratulate them both, though that's the least of my many issues with that wedding.

If you do table visits please don't split up, though I doubt you or anyone here would consider that as an option.

MandyMost

InLoveInQueens said:

I voted table visits because as a guest I much prefer them, though the last wedding I went to did table visits but the couple split up and the groom greeted his friends/family and the bride greeted hers so I never got to say a single word to the groom, which I really didn't like. I wanted to at least congratulate them both, though that's the least of my many issues with that wedding.

If you do table visits please don't split up, though I doubt you or anyone here would consider that as an option.

We visited the tables together, but essentially split up while at each table. It just kind of happened organically. We'd both start talking to the same person, and then end up getting pulled into talking to someone else at the table. I still feel like I got to say hi to everyone, though, even if for me it was a quick "Hi" and barely a hug while my husband talked to them for a few minutes and I talked to someone else.

We also sat with our guests for dinner (at a table for 10), and attended more than 30 minutes of our cocktail hour, so we got to socialize with people more that way as well. I feel like the less socializing you do (i.e. sweetheart table, skipping the cocktail hours for an "entrance" later, etc.) the more important more time is with each guest during the official greetings are. 

PrettyGirlLost

lnixon8 said:

table visits. As a guest I'd prefer to get to a cocktail hour instead of waiting in line to say hi.

Her ceremony and reception are in the same place (IIRC), so guests can go grab a cocktail and then get in the receiving line.

charlotte989875

We had a fairly large wedding (200ish) so we did a receiving line. We were worried if we just did table visits we might miss people as they got up to get drinks, wander, dance after dinner since we would have so many to get to. But we also made a point to go around and talk to everyone at some point as well. 

Jen4948

While I'm not opposed to receiving lines, especially for larger weddings, they can feel rushed, especially if you have to encourage really talky people to move on so you can greet the next person in line.

I like table visits better, but that does mean that you have to catch people at their tables.

OurWildKingdom

PrettyGirlLost said:

lnixon8 said:

table visits. As a guest I'd prefer to get to a cocktail hour instead of waiting in line to say hi.

Her ceremony and reception are in the same place (IIRC), so guests can go grab a cocktail and then get in the receiving line.

Correct, the ceremony and reception are in the same place.

crowsgirl15

I've been to a ceremony and reception in the same place with a receiving line. The guest list was probably 150-200. My date and I spent about 30 minutes staring forlornly at drinks and apps while we waited to shake hands with the bride and groom.

I'm team table visits for larger weddings. I'm actually of the opinion that receiving lines work much better for a small crowd. You always have to think of the guest who's in the back of that long line.

SP29

PrettyGirlLost said:

lnixon8 said:

table visits. As a guest I'd prefer to get to a cocktail hour instead of waiting in line to say hi.

Her ceremony and reception are in the same place (IIRC), so guests can go grab a cocktail and then get in the receiving line.

We had our ceremony and reception in the same room, so there was a 15 min room flip. This is when we did our receiving line, after the ceremony outside on the covered verandah. Worked out well, and we did the formal receiving line in under 15 mins, so spent the rest of the time casually talking with guests.

Casadena

I voted receiving line over table visits.  I really really dislike having to sit for a long time for dinner, toasts, dances etc.  and the B&G always seem to come chat when i finally get my food.  Personally, not a fan.  A receiving line is much faster in my experience and then just make sure to mingle throughout the evening.  It shouldn't be hard to speak to everyone.

PrettyGirlLost

crowsgirl15 said:

I've been to a ceremony and reception in the same place with a receiving line. The guest list was probably 150-200. My date and I spent about 30 minutes staring forlornly at drinks and apps while we waited to shake hands with the bride and groom.

I'm team table visits for larger weddings. I'm actually of the opinion that receiving lines work much better for a small crowd. You always have to think of the guest who's in the back of that long line.

Why didn't you get a drink and some apps and then get in the receiving line?  Plus, you don't have to get in the line as a guest ;-)  I typically skip them when they are at the churches after the ceremony or if they are super long.

We had 150-160 guests and we did a receiving line at our reception venue, right at the end of cocktail hour as the venue was setting up the food stations.  It took maybe 20mins max, and there was never much of an actual line since it was cocktail hour and guests were mingling.  So they'd pop in and out of the line at their convenience, and by the time the dinner stations were ready to open we had seen just about every guest.  Those who chose not to go through the line we caught up with later on the dance floor.

crowsgirl15

PrettyGirlLost said:

crowsgirl15 said:

I've been to a ceremony and reception in the same place with a receiving line. The guest list was probably 150-200. My date and I spent about 30 minutes staring forlornly at drinks and apps while we waited to shake hands with the bride and groom.

I'm team table visits for larger weddings. I'm actually of the opinion that receiving lines work much better for a small crowd. You always have to think of the guest who's in the back of that long line.

Why didn't you get a drink and some apps and then get in the receiving line?  Plus, you don't have to get in the line as a guest ;-)  I typically skip them when they are at the churches after the ceremony or if they are super long.

We had 150-160 guests and we did a receiving line at our reception venue, right at the end of cocktail hour as the venue was setting up the food stations.  It took maybe 20mins max, and there was never much of an actual line since it was cocktail hour and guests were mingling.  So they'd pop in and out of the line at their convenience, and by the time the dinner stations were ready to open we had seen just about every guest.  Those who chose not to go through the line we caught up with later on the dance floor.

The drinks and apps were very separated from the line. Plus, had we left the line to get them, we'd have to get back into the line behind the 50 people behind us (seriously, this line went on forever). At the end of cocktail hour probably would have been more appreciated by me as a guest.

To the bolded, I assumed that would be rude of me to not congratulate the bride and groom, since they invited me to their wedding. Am I off base there? I guess in the future I could skip it...

All I can say is that the small weddings I've been to with a receiving line seemed short and convenient, and the bigger weddings with table visits seemed more convenient to me as a guest. I do feel an obligation to wait in a receiving line if one is there, and would feel rude to skip it. But perhaps that's just me.

PrettyGirlLost

crowsgirl15 said:

PrettyGirlLost said:

crowsgirl15 said:

I've been to a ceremony and reception in the same place with a receiving line. The guest list was probably 150-200. My date and I spent about 30 minutes staring forlornly at drinks and apps while we waited to shake hands with the bride and groom.

I'm team table visits for larger weddings. I'm actually of the opinion that receiving lines work much better for a small crowd. You always have to think of the guest who's in the back of that long line.

Why didn't you get a drink and some apps and then get in the receiving line?  Plus, you don't have to get in the line as a guest ;-)  I typically skip them when they are at the churches after the ceremony or if they are super long.

We had 150-160 guests and we did a receiving line at our reception venue, right at the end of cocktail hour as the venue was setting up the food stations.  It took maybe 20mins max, and there was never much of an actual line since it was cocktail hour and guests were mingling.  So they'd pop in and out of the line at their convenience, and by the time the dinner stations were ready to open we had seen just about every guest.  Those who chose not to go through the line we caught up with later on the dance floor.

The drinks and apps were very separated from the line. Plus, had we left the line to get them, we'd have to get back into the line behind the 50 people behind us (seriously, this line went on forever). At the end of cocktail hour probably would have been more appreciated by me as a guest.

To the bolded, I assumed that would be rude of me to not congratulate the bride and groom, since they invited me to their wedding. Am I off base there? I guess in the future I could skip it...

All I can say is that the small weddings I've been to with a receiving line seemed short and convenient, and the bigger weddings with table visits seemed more convenient to me as a guest. I do feel an obligation to wait in a receiving line if one is there, and would feel rude to skip it. But perhaps that's just me.

You can congratulate the couple at any time- in the receiving line, at the reception, right as you leave the reception.  It's not as if you (general sense) won't see the couple at all for the rest of the day, so I don't think there's anything wrong with skipping a receiving line as a guest.

crowsgirl15

PrettyGirlLost said:

You can congratulate the couple at any time- in the receiving line, at the reception, right as you leave the reception.  It's not as if you (general sense) won't see the couple at all for the rest of the day, so I don't think there's anything wrong with skipping a receiving line as a guest.

I may just have to do that next time, then It is also extremely likely that this one experience colored receiving lines for me in general. There were a lot of issues with that wedding, lol

[Deleted User]

We did receiving line at the ceremony (reception at different location) and then did a few table visits at the reception to catch the guests that only attended the reception. We had a few guests who don't work traditional hours so they weren't able to make it to the ceremony. This reduced the amount of time saying hi & hugging people at the reception and by time we were able to do table visits, a lot of people were already up at the bar or at other tables visiting with other guests. It helped reduce the chance of missing people.

poodledoodleooo

I prefer receiving lines. When I married, we had quite a few guests who came for the ceremony but not the reception, so had we skipped the line we would have never been able to say hi! We also had guests who skipped the ceremony and came to the reception, but since receptions in our area are typically pretty long (7-9 hours) I knew I'd be able to find those that didn't make it to the ceremony. I also hate it when bride and groom come up for table visits and I'm smack dab in the middle of a bite of whatever it is I'm eating. It makes me feel a bit like

I just think receiving lines are a bit neater, if that makes sense, and I never really get to chat with the B&G if their doing table visits, since they usually try to make the rounds fairly quickly so they can get on with whatever is next (like cake cutting, first dance, toasts, whatever).

I think it's pretty rude to skip a receiving line if a bride and groom choose to go that route. I mean, sure, you can find them later, but I equate it to going to someone's party in their house, going straight for the cocktails and snacks and then saying hello a few hours later. Just seems rude to me!

OurWildKingdom

@PoodleDoodleOoo, I swear that happens to me Every. Single. Time. I'm in a restaurant. The server always stops by when I'm in mid-bite.

Thanks everyone! I'm still trying to make up my mind, but I'm leaning more towards a receiving line. FW wants an outdoor ceremony in the park itself rather than in the pavilion (weather permitting, of course), so a receiving line as people move from ceremony to reception seems to make sense.

peachy13

We did table visits for our wedding of 185 people. People can comfortably sit, enjoy their drinks, and eat --- I realize it's not the best time to greet and thank guests when they're in the middle of a bite of food, but at least they're not standing in a line without food/drinks. The only time I've been to a wedding with a receiving line, it was kind of forced on us which I didn't really like (and didn't understand since it was my first one). I felt like we were peasants waiting in line to greet and king and queen. I was also standing in line for 40 minutes to finally see them which sucked, and the couple was trying to hurry things up so it was sort of a quick "hiya thanks for coming friend" deal while others in front of me got more time.

poodledoodleooo

@peachy13 - holy cow 40 minutes for a receiving line?! Was there literally 1000 people there? My wedding of 150 took about 10 minutes tops and was more likely less than that.

bleve0821

We tried to do table visits, and it didn't work at all, and we only had 65 guests.  I would have preferred to do a receiving line, but the way DH ended up chatting, that would never have worked, either.  

peachy13

PoodleDoodleOoo said:

@peachy13 - holy cow 40 minutes for a receiving line?! Was there literally 1000 people there? My wedding of 150 took about 10 minutes tops and was more likely less than that.

it was about a 200 person wedding.

OurWildKingdom

We'll also have beverages ready to go beforehand, or at least water. September weather can be surprisingly warm here, even with the lake breeze, so our guests will have something to drink while they wait in line and get settled in. 

poodledoodleooo

@peachy13 - they must have had a ridiculously inefficient set up. I've been to weddings with 350+ and the receiving lines were still never longer than 15 minutes - even if you were the very last person!