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That's NOT my name

bleve0821bleve0821 member
1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
in Wedding Woes
I work in a small office with a bunch of busybodies, so, naturally, word got out that I got married.  That's fine, I don't really care.  A few weeks before the wedding, a woman I had never met knocked on my door and started talking about having advanced degrees and women changing names and all sorts of other nosey things.  At one point, she asked, "So what's your FI's last name?"  Against my better judgement, I told her, and, knowing where the conversation was headed, said, "But I'm keeping my name after we get married."

I'm not, exactly, but it was easier to say I'll (eventually) change it personally but will continue to use my maiden professionally.

So, of course, this woman says, "I'm going to call you Dr. Hislastname."

....No, bitch.  That's--no.  What?  Why?  Why would you do that?

I put the incident out of my mind, since getting married was my priority and everything else was just the pea under the mattress.

This morning (my first day back), my boss said, "Congratulations, Mrs....?"  And I said, "It'll be Dr. Blonde.  I haven't decided to change it."  So I am not sure why I came back from lunch today to find that my office placard had been replaced with Atomic Hislastnamemisspelled, PhD.

....

Sigh.  The honeymoon is over.


"And when they use our atoms to make new lives, they won’t just be able to take one, they’ll have to take two, one of you and one of me..."
--Philip Pullman

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Re: That's NOT my name

  • missJeanLouisemissJeanLouise member
    Eighth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    Booo! What jerks.
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  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    MesmrEwe said:
    ...and that's when you go to HR and ask "Hey, um, where's my new office - I see there's a new Doctor starting up and took my name down - I'm surprised no one told me about it - anything I need to know about?"  It's the old "NEVER assume - it just makes an @$$ out of U and me!" ... 
    Yeah, I was gonna say, go directly to HR. Who the hell changes name placards without authorization?
    ________________________________


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  • princessleia22princessleia22 member
    Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Answer
    Wow, I'd be pissed.  Especially since you had told that woman early on that you were keeping your name (I definitely would have more forcefully corrected her when she said "I'm going to call you Dr. Hislastname").  And you told your boss THIS MORNING that you were keeping your name, so why the hell would they change your name after that? I would definitely have a chat with boss or HR.

    image 

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  • mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    "Did you know that removing my autonomy and agency as a person makes you all name-rapists?"  

    GOD, what a bunch of assholes.  I'd be so angry as well.  

    I hope the honeymoon was fun.  ;) 
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  • kimmiinthemittenkimmiinthemitten member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    I would be pissed too.  Not sure what kind of work you do, but if it were me, I would change my name randomly in emails.  Change the last name, spelling, order, whatever.  If they think your name is so fluid, all is fair, right?
    image
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  • baconsmombaconsmom member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    And to think, I get irritated when people assume I'm a "Mrs." instead of a "Ms." At least no one's changed my damn name on me. 

    Though I finally trained my mother to address mail to "Mrs. Bacon HisLast" instead of "Mrs. HisFirst HisLast". That's as much as I'm getting out of her. 
    image
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