Wedding Etiquette Forum

Tip with Bottle of Wine?

I've been planning on giving a bottle of wine to each of the vendors (photographer, makeup, hair, dj) except the bartenders (cash tip) and I wasn't sure if this was acceptable. Is there some rule that tips must be cash?

Re: Tip with Bottle of Wine?

  • levioosalevioosa Southern California member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited May 2016
    Yeah, to me bottles of wine are for friends and social events.  Your vendors are part of a business transaction.  Just tip them cash.  Or is this your way of trying to avoid tipping them?  I'm guessing you aren't exactly planning on getting them super nice bottles of wine, either, so a $8-15 tip is also pretty insulting.  


    ETA: By "social events" I mean like a hostess gift. 


    image
    InLoveInQueens
  • edited May 2016
    Why do you want to tip in wine, and not cash? I tend to over tip, but the way I see it, is these vendors are providing service for one of the most important days of your life, if there's ever a time a tip well, it's at your wedding. Assuming they provided you with adequate service.
    InLoveInQueens
  • Yeah...no.  If it's a super-expensive bottle of wine, chances are very good that they would rather have had the cash.  If it's not an expensive bottle of wine, it's an insulting tip.
    ei34InLoveInQueensKnickerGold
  • ei34ei34 member
    Ninth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I think of wine as more of a gift.  I'd tip professionals in cash.
    OurWildKingdomSP29InLoveInQueens
  • SP29SP29 member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Agreed, this is part of a business transaction, not a "thank you" gift for a friend.

    Would you tip your restaurant server a bottle of wine?
    ei34
  • A good bottle of wine makes a nice thank you gift for a wedding party member or ceremony reader who loves wine. But don't use it to tip your professional vendors. They may not like wine, or they may not drink due to religious or health reasons or addiction issues. You have no way of knowing. Cash is a much safer and more appropriate way to go.
    image
    InLoveInQueensOurWildKingdomSP29mollybarker11
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Tipped employees depend on their tips as part of their income. What if your boss took away part of your paycheck and replaced it with wine? How would you pay your bills? Replacing a tip with wine is doing exactly that. 

    Wine is fine for a thank you gift to your friends, but it is not how you pay staff. 
    JediElizabethInLoveInQueensOurWildKingdomSP29
  • I guess I should have clarified. These are all the owners of their companies, not employees. I've already tipped them when I sent my final payments to each of them, but I feel weird not giving them something after the actual wedding. I don't really want to tip on top of already tipping, so I was trying to think of an alternative.
  • ezizabef said:
    I guess I should have clarified. These are all the owners of their companies, not employees. I've already tipped them when I sent my final payments to each of them, but I feel weird not giving them something after the actual wedding. I don't really want to tip on top of already tipping, so I was trying to think of an alternative.
    I think a bottle of wine with a thank you card, after having already tipped, is a nice gesture. If they're like me and abhor wine, I think most people will still see it as sweet and courteous - and people like me tend to re-gift wine as host/ess gifts. ;)

     As long as they're not stiffed on their actual monetary tip, I think it's a nice idea.
    OurWildKingdomcupcait927SP29
  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom South Jersey member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    ezizabef said:
    I guess I should have clarified. These are all the owners of their companies, not employees. I've already tipped them when I sent my final payments to each of them, but I feel weird not giving them something after the actual wedding. I don't really want to tip on top of already tipping, so I was trying to think of an alternative.


    You already tipped, so no need to tip them again.  If you want to write them a note after the fact, I would do that.

    This is more for lurkers, since you have tipped already.  But I would never tip anyone until after the service has been performed.  Theoretically they could do a shitty job now, because they were already tipped and have no incentive to do a good job.  Or they do their normal job and you feel underwhelmed with their service, but you cannot alter the  amount you want to tip because you already did.

    OurWildKingdomSP29
  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic Indiana member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    ezizabef said:
    I guess I should have clarified. These are all the owners of their companies, not employees. I've already tipped them when I sent my final payments to each of them, but I feel weird not giving them something after the actual wedding. I don't really want to tip on top of already tipping, so I was trying to think of an alternative.


    You already tipped, so no need to tip them again.  If you want to write them a note after the fact, I would do that.

    This is more for lurkers, since you have tipped already.  But I would never tip anyone until after the service has been performed.  Theoretically they could do a shitty job now, because they were already tipped and have no incentive to do a good job.  Or they do their normal job and you feel underwhelmed with their service, but you cannot alter the  amount you want to tip because you already did.

    Totally agree! For a photography, DD didn't tip until they received their wedding album/photos.
    SP29
  • ezizabef said:
    I guess I should have clarified. These are all the owners of their companies, not employees. I've already tipped them when I sent my final payments to each of them, but I feel weird not giving them something after the actual wedding. I don't really want to tip on top of already tipping, so I was trying to think of an alternative.
    OH, I see now.  That makes more sense.  If you have already tipped, there is no reason to feel weird on the day of.  Another tip is totally unnecessary.  But there is nothing wrong with another little gift if you feel moved to give it.  Not everyone drinks, but wine is such a common and neutral gift that it is extremely unlikely to offend even the most die-hard teetotalers.  
    OurWildKingdom
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    if you tipped them in cash already, you're good.  A lot of vendors would love a good rating (especially on here, the knot) if they deserve it.  The more good reviews they get then the more awards and acknowledgements they receive and thus, more events booked.  They will appreciate that!

    OurWildKingdomlevioosaSP29
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