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Wedding coordinator gift?

Hi all,

I'm getting married in the MGM Grand in Vegas and have a wedding coordinator who arranged my wedding package and has been in contact with me through email. She has been very helpful and very prompt with her replies to my numerous and probably annoying barrage of emails! I can't afford to tip her- I know the going rate is around 10% but that would be hundreds of dollars which we can't afford (FMIL has paid for the package for us). 
Would it be ok to get her a gift and, if so, any suggestions? I'm thinking some kind of jewellery.
If you think I have to tip as opposed to giving a gift please say (I'm sure you all will
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Re: Wedding coordinator gift?

  • lyndausvilyndausvi Western Slope, Colorado
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    Honestly, they just want cash.  Even if it's less than the "standard".

    Jewelry is so personal, unless you know her well I wouldn't go that route.  

    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • Caveat:  I didn't have a wedding coordinator.

    However, if it is customary to tip a wedding coordinator 10%, than I think you need to give as much of a cash tip as you can (up to that).  If it is more on the side of "nice", but not necessarily expected, than I think you should give her a bit of a cash tip and a fun/neat token from where you live that she probably couldn't get in Las Vegas (see the rest of my post below).

    If I'm not mistaken, don't you live in England?  If so, maybe if you'll be short on the cash tip, you could bring her something unique from England (or wherever you live).  Of course, something that would be generally liked by most people.

    Not quite the same thing, but I currently live in New Orleans and got married in my hometown in So CA.  With the exception of us and the BM/his g/f, nobody else lived in NOLA.  For wedding favors, I brought pralines for everyone.  A local sweet treat.  For my mom/stepdad, I gifted them alligator sausage and crawfish sausage (amongst other things), because my stepdad always buys that kind of stuff to take home with him when he visits. 

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  • Thanks for the info so far. 
    PS- my last sentence was supposed to have a wink emoji with it, just in case people think it's snarky!
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  • Yeah, I think the answer is to give whatever cash you can afford plus perhaps a little token gift from "home" if you feel so inclined.  As a professional, your wedding coordinator is doing this job for money, not for jewelry that may or may not be to her personal taste.

    Now to initiate a shitstorm: are your future inlaws aware that tipping is standard?  Do they know that this is putting you in the uncomfortable position of stiffing or shorting someone who has offered you stellar service?  Do the two of you have the sort of relationship with them where you could bring this up to them?  Personally, if these were my parents I would ask if they could help cover the tip.  I know that asking people for things is super not etiquette approved, but for extremely close relationships like this (parents) I believe it's a know-your-crowd thing.  My mom and dad are moderately well off, and I know they would want me to point something like this out to them.  They would be mortified if their straight-up not knowing about a customary tip meant a service-person got screwed over.  I'm not saying you *should* ask the parents or that they *should* cover the tip, but if your partner's family works like mine does that could be an option.
  • SP29SP29
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I would stay away from personal gifts, as this is not a personal relationship. I doubt you know her well enough to know what jewelry she would prefer.

    I would tip as well as you can with cash. Thought I think a token gift from wherever you are from would be fine.
  • Tip what you can, in cash. Even if it's not 10% unless you actually know her personally, just is the best option. 

    I tipped my venue coordinator like $200 not even close to 10% but it's what we could do. 
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