Wut?

mrsconn23

Dear Prudence,
My sister used to be a professional dominatrix. She was quite open with me about this and said that she stopped because she was tired of being “topped from the bottom”; she wanted “real” control. We haven’t discussed this for some years now, and it never occurred to me that it might not be a good idea to leave my preteen son alone with her. The other day, I arrived early to pick him up, and it took my sister a while to answer the door. It appeared that she and my son may have both hastily put their clothes back on. I later asked my son what happened in general terms, so as not to sound accusing of anyone. His answer was plausible, but it almost sounded rehearsed. I’m not sure what to do. Maybe nothing untoward happened and I’m just being paranoid. I love my sister, and I really think she would know better than to do anything remotely sexual with her nephew or anyone his age. Should I talk to my sister and hope she can assure me that everything’s OK? Or should I just assume the worst and never again leave my son in her care?

—Worried About Sister and Son

DrillSergeantCat

Why are you writing a letter instead of talking to your sister??

NOLABridesmaid

Awww. No!

On all of this.

ThisShamanluvsaMage

Of course talk to your sister, but trust your gut more.  A family member of FI's set off a gut reaction for me, and it was right.  Glad I listened to it, even without proof.

6fsn

I'd trust my gut until there was proof nothing happened. 

I don't know what "topped from the bottom" means and I don't want to google.

charlotte989875

What was his answer??

CharmedPam

Wut is a REALLY good title for this.

ThisShamanluvsaMage

6fsn said:

I don't know what "topped from the bottom" means and I don't want to google.

The role playing gives the illusion that the Top/dom is in control, but really the sub/bottom is, b/c they decide when enough is enough.  Sister wants to Top w/ real control (no safe words and shit), not the role-playing illusion.

I think.

6fsn

ThisShamanluvsaMage said:

6fsn said:

I don't know what "topped from the bottom" means and I don't want to google.

The role playing gives the illusion that the Top/dom is in control, but really the sub/bottom is, b/c they decide when enough is enough.  Sister wants to Top w/ real control (no safe words and shit), not the role-playing illusion.

I think.

That makes sense.  That also makes it an even more scary situation for the nephew.  Mom needs to be cracking down and investigating.

baconsmom

Enh....I've always heard topping from the bottom as the sub giving commands and being unwilling to truly sub. There should *always* be safewords and limits. Even my H and I have safewords, though we know each other well enough that we don't ever really have to use them. 

She sounds like a shitty Domme, and also this all sounds lifted from 50 Shades. Like, how do you pick the shittiest part of a shitty book to emulate? 

Shitty. I just felt I needed another one in there. 

kimmiinthemitten

I can't figure out if the nephew is truly at risk or if the sister is a Judgey McJudgerson who is projecting.

*Barbie*

baconsmom said:

Enh....I've always heard topping from the bottom as the sub giving commands and being unwilling to truly sub. There should *always* be safewords and limits. Even my H and I have safewords, though we know each other well enough that we don't ever really have to use them. 

She sounds like a shitty Domme, and also this all sounds lifted from 50 Shades. Like, how do you pick the shittiest part of a shitty book to emulate? 

Shitty. I just felt I needed another one in there. 

hopefully all he was doing was ripping out her tampon, or going over a contract for the millionth time.