Etiquette for a Party Bus

poodledoodleooo

Also in the camp of "this sounds like an awesome party/reception and I'd totally be down for it" as long as the guests aren't expected to open their wallets.

I can see the appeal of having a bus vs. gathering in a bar/club because a) you get to see more attractions and b) the bus can become your own exclusive little club on wheels.

I do like the suggestion of eating dinner first, then going on the bus, and possibly stopping for some pre-paid dessert, but there isn't anything inherently wrong with grabbing pizza instead. Happy planning and have fun!

kylexo

i think asking everyone for $10, in addition to being poor hosting and rude, will come across as super petty. for 25 people, that's $250, which in the grand scheme of wedding planning is barely anything. host properly, weddings aren't BYOB events.

KatCtoKatA

We're basically planning what many folks here have suggested.  Ceremony, then to dinner and drinks with a party bus after.  Dinner will be in a private room at a restaurant, with open bar, then the bus time is basically a traveling cocktail hour afterwards.  We have about 30 guests, many of whom aren't frequent Vegas visitors, and we wanted to give them a chance to get out to the Welcome sign, and see the entire Vegas strip. 

This isn't like, a Greyhound tour bus either.  There are neon lights, music and room for moving around, more like a limo. Of course, no one is obligated to ride along, just like no one would be obligated to stay at a regular reception.  While I know my parents aren't nearly as excited about this as our friends, I can't see them enjoying a Vegas club either.  While it's not exactly a traditional wedding reception, it's really not that unusual an option for a Vegas wedding.

AddieCake

KahluaKoala said:

I guess I just don't understand why you'd want to be on a bus when you could be in one of the 783294732948302184321 bars and clubs and party spots available IN vegas. I like the "party hopping" thing, but why ON a bus? Where is the bus going to? I see that a sit down reception isn't what you're really going for - but what about a meal (pizza?) with a few drinks and then an unhosted after party at a bar or club?

Because they want it on the party bus, I imagine. Why did any of us make the location choices we made for our weddings? 

CMGragain

scribe95 said:

It has a Vegas feel so I think it's cool. Having some drinks, stopping at the Vegas sign for pics; more drinks; stopping for pizza; more drinks; stopping to watch the fountains. It is definitely nontraditional but I think it could be fun for a younger set of people. 

Ahem.  And what is Grandma supposed to do?  This might be a good plan for a bachelorette party, but this is supposed to be a wedding reception.

[Deleted User]

CMGragain said:

scribe95 said:

It has a Vegas feel so I think it's cool. Having some drinks, stopping at the Vegas sign for pics; more drinks; stopping for pizza; more drinks; stopping to watch the fountains. It is definitely nontraditional but I think it could be fun for a younger set of people. 

Ahem.  And what is Grandma supposed to do?  This might be a good plan for a bachelorette party, but this is supposed to be a wedding reception.

I have a hunch that this isn't a wedding grandma would be attending. 

monkeysip

spockforprez said:

Hey, it's a wedding in Vegas which I think has a certain party connotation and guests will understand that and accept or decline accordingly. I personally am into the super sentimental and simple type wedding but I can see how this would be a fun and wacky wedding and if my friends were the fun and wacky type, it would be a blast to help them celebrate in their own style. I would definitely give the party bus a try (with some dramamine as I get motion sickness). It doesn't sound like my thing but something I would be willing to try and enjoy for a friend's wedding! And who knows, it could turn out to be a totally awesome evening and a cherished memory! 

Definitely do not ask for help paying for alcohol, though. I think you got that from previous posts! 

I'm with spock on this one.

I'm not a "partier" and I've never been to Vegas, but assuming I could actually go out to Vegas for this to see a friend's wedding, I think this could be fun.  Kind of a nice way to experience/see Vegas in 2 hours.  

I agree with others about making sure there's sufficient stops (so you're not literally on a bus for 2 hours) and about stopping for food.  I would definitely need to eat a good meal.  And probably wouldn't drink that much (I'm not a big drinker). 

Jen4948

CMGragain said:

scribe95 said:

It has a Vegas feel so I think it's cool. Having some drinks, stopping at the Vegas sign for pics; more drinks; stopping for pizza; more drinks; stopping to watch the fountains. It is definitely nontraditional but I think it could be fun for a younger set of people. 

Ahem.  And what is Grandma supposed to do?  This might be a good plan for a bachelorette party, but this is supposed to be a wedding reception.

Assuming Grandma is invited and plans to attend, she can get on the bus with everyone else.

LD1970

My mother, who is a grandmother, would totally attend this wedding.

CMGragain

I'm a grandmother, and I could not and would not.

redoryx

CMGragain said:

I'm a grandmother, and I could not and would not.

Okay? I know grandmothers who can and would. Just because you can't and won't doesn't make it a blanket rule for grandmothers everywhere.  

jacques27

CMGragain said:

I'm a grandmother, and I could not and would not.

But are you the OP's grandmother?

You do realize that grandmothers aren't just one homogenous group of people with the same interests and capabilities, right?

CMGragain

redoryx said:

CMGragain said:

I'm a grandmother, and I could not and would not.

Okay? I know grandmothers who can and would. Just because you can't and won't doesn't make it a blanket rule for grandmothers everywhere.  

I have no problem with having a party bus to celebrate a wedding.  I do have a problem with it if that is the ONLY hospitality offered. This is supposed to be a WEDDING RECEPTION.  It should include everyone.  At age 65, I can still walk on my own, but I can't do stairs easily, especially bus stairs.  I can't drink more than one drink.  My DH is hard of hearing, and he would hate a scenario like the OP is proposing for her wedding reception.  We are not that unusual for older people, and I have several friends that are not as spry as I am..
My point is that a wedding reception is a thank you from the couple to their guests for coming to the ceremony.  It should be in the form of offering food and drink.  An after-party, which is what the party bus sounds like, is fine, but it is not a replacement for a reception, which should include ALL guests, not just the party-on crowd.
Would you invite families to a wedding and then have a reception which excludes children?  This is just one example.
The last wedding I attended, there was dancing.  People had the choice to dance - or not.  There was alcohol.  People had the choice to drink alcohol - or not.  There was plenty of food - nobody wanted to pass that up!  The OP is not giving her guests these choices.  They are on the bus and must go with the crowd.
Like I said, great after party for those who choose it, but not a good WEDDING RECEPTION.

monkeysip

I would agree with @CMGragain, but what if the OP knows that this is something her guests would enjoy?  What if she's actually talked to them about it?

She has a small guest list for a Vegas wedding.  My guess (or hope) is that all of these people would be down with partying, and that she's not inviting people that couldn't or wouldn't get on a party bus.  

STARMOON44

Oh come on. It's perfectly fine. Hard of hearing? Okay tell me more about how any wedding with a loud band is problematic? Can't have more than one drink? Ok cool-don't! Trouble with stairs? Turns out there are accessible buses. 

As as long as everything is hosted, there's nothing wrong with a couple hours sitting on a bus versus cake and punch in a church hall. 

MobKaz

I have to agree with the points @CMGragain raises.

You do try to make your event as comfortable for all guests as possible. When I host, whether for a large reception or private home event, I absolutely take all guests into consideration.  At a wedding reception, I make sure guests with hearing issues have a table farther away from the speakers. There is also more than one place to go to hold conversations. Music selections are also varied to account for the variety of listening and dancing pleasures.  I am not hard of hearing, but at some events, I welcome the change in music so that, at least briefly, I do not have to "shout" through my conversations.

I am hopeful, as @monkeysip stated, that because this guest list is so small, the OP has taken all guests into consideration and knows them well enough to decide whether this type of "reception" works.

kimmiinthemitten

Not everyone has grandparents to plan for either.   And as the daughter of Deaf parents (one of which hates loud music/ noises and the other who loves it- because ETF -  just like grandparents not all Deaf/Hard of hearing people are the same either) I think we're safe to give the OP the benefit of the doubt that she's taken her guest list into consideration. She also stated early on, this was for everyone attending. 

OP, I think this sounds like a blast. My only recommendation would be similar to others, serve the food first. Stopping for pizza for 25 can easily be a 30-45 minute stop by the time everyone gets off the bus, goes to the bathroom, eats, cleans up and gets back on the bus. That's 40% of your reception time. 

Jen4948

CMGragain said:

redoryx said:

CMGragain said:

I'm a grandmother, and I could not and would not.

Okay? I know grandmothers who can and would. Just because you can't and won't doesn't make it a blanket rule for grandmothers everywhere.  

I have no problem with having a party bus to celebrate a wedding.  I do have a problem with it if that is the ONLY hospitality offered. This is supposed to be a WEDDING RECEPTION.  It should include everyone.  At age 65, I can still walk on my own, but I can't do stairs easily, especially bus stairs.  I can't drink more than one drink.  My DH is hard of hearing, and he would hate a scenario like the OP is proposing for her wedding reception.  We are not that unusual for older people, and I have several friends that are not as spry as I am..
My point is that a wedding reception is a thank you from the couple to their guests for coming to the ceremony.  It should be in the form of offering food and drink.  An after-party, which is what the party bus sounds like, is fine, but it is not a replacement for a reception, which should include ALL guests, not just the party-on crowd.
Would you invite families to a wedding and then have a reception which excludes children?  This is just one example.
The last wedding I attended, there was dancing.  People had the choice to dance - or not.  There was alcohol.  People had the choice to drink alcohol - or not.  There was plenty of food - nobody wanted to pass that up!  The OP is not giving her guests these choices.  They are on the bus and must go with the crowd.
Like I said, great after party for those who choose it, but not a good WEDDING RECEPTION.

Grandparents and other elderly guests have the same choice about going on the bus as every other guest. Simply because the reception is on a bus does not automatically exclude them.

You might not make that choice for yourself because you wouldn't be comfortable, but you have no right to expect the couple to plan a separate reception just for you because you're the one guest who wouldn't be comfortable. Nor can you make that determination for every other guest, regardless of age. 

ILoveBeachMusic

I agree with all the PPs about giving the OP the benefit of the doubt in knowing her crowd. If I had grandparents whom I knew wouldn't be comfortable with this type of reception, I wouldn't do it. The reception is for your guests so it is important to know if this is something they would enjoy.

kahluakoala

KatCtoKatA said:

We're basically planning what many folks here have suggested.  Ceremony, then to dinner and drinks with a party bus after.  Dinner will be in a private room at a restaurant, with open bar, then the bus time is basically a traveling cocktail hour afterwards.  We have about 30 guests, many of whom aren't frequent Vegas visitors, and we wanted to give them a chance to get out to the Welcome sign, and see the entire Vegas strip. 

This isn't like, a Greyhound tour bus either.  There are neon lights, music and room for moving around, more like a limo. Of course, no one is obligated to ride along, just like no one would be obligated to stay at a regular reception.  While I know my parents aren't nearly as excited about this as our friends, I can't see them enjoying a Vegas club either.  While it's not exactly a traditional wedding reception, it's really not that unusual an option for a Vegas wedding.

@KatCtoKatA are you the OP? If so, I think we can all agree that this is fine. I don't really enjoy party busses with no destination, but this isn't rude and anyone can be hosted at the dinner after. I can't tell beause the OP is a Knottie# - so not sure if you changed your name or are a different person.

SP29

Of course the hosts of an event should always take their guests into consideration, but that doesn't mean a party bus in inherently rude.

We had guests with mobility issues, so we made sure any venue we considered had main floor access to a bathroom, and an elevator if there were any stairs.

As for drinking, just because it's a party bus doesn't mean guests have to drink. I assume non-alcoholic beverages will also be offered (as that is basic hosting).

As for the noise, there can be music on without the bass pumping. I've also been to more traditional wedding receptions in a banquet hall where guests can hardly talk over the music being too loud.

photokitty

I agree with @CMGragain, @monkeysip and @MobKaz. I don't think it's rude, but as I said before I do think its tacky. I just hope all the traveling guests no about three reception plans.

If I flew to Vegas only to find out the reception was a 2 hour party bus with pizza, I'd be annoyed. If you are having a destination wedding, I assume it will be better than what you would host at home. Destination weddings costs the guests more, in most cases. So I side eye a couple who use a destination wedding as a way to cheap out on the reception.

CMGragain

photokitty said:

I agree with @CMGragain, @monkeysip and @MobKaz. I don't think it's rude, but as I said before I do think its tacky. I just hope all the traveling guests no about three reception plans.

If I flew to Vegas only to find out the reception was a 2 hour party bus with pizza, I'd be annoyed. If you are having a destination wedding, I assume it will be better than what you would host at home. Destination weddings costs the guests more, in most cases. So I side eye a couple who use a destination wedding as a way to cheap out on the reception.

This!

Jen4948

Lots of weddings, whether destination or at home, require that out-of-town guests fly in. That doesn't mean they're entitled to additional hospitality. The wedding invitation is not a subpoena. It was their choice to come. Provided there is enough food and beverage all for that time of day, the guests aren't entitled to more - regardless of how far they had to fly.

So you can side-eye the couple all you want because the reception is a couple of hours on a party bus. But as long as there are enough food and drinks for that time of day, the hosts aren't wrong for having a party bus.

KatCtoKatA

KahluaKoala said:

@KatCtoKatA are you the OP? If so, I think we can all agree that this is fine. I don't really enjoy party busses with no destination, but this isn't rude and anyone can be hosted at the dinner after. I can't tell beause the OP is a Knottie# - so not sure if you changed your name or are a different person.

I'm not.  I was hoping to offer a counter-point to those who aren't in favor, noting that it really isn't an unusual for Vegas type of reception.  (Though, as my plans reflect, I do support the idea of it being part of the reception, not the entire reception.) 

While I get it's not for everyone, and isn't what everyone would want if they were a guest, I sorta feel like it goes outside the realm of etiquette and into personal preference.  I would be disappointed to travel to Vegas and get a hotel ballroom wedding that could have been hosted in any anonymous city, so that's not the party I'm throwing.

photokitty

Jen4948 said:

Lots of weddings, whether destination or at home, require that out-of-town guests fly in. That doesn't mean they're entitled to additional hospitality. The wedding invitation is not a subpoena. It was their choice to come. Provided there is enough food and beverage all for that time of day, the guests aren't entitled to more - regardless of how far they had to fly.

So you can side-eye the couple all you want because the reception is a couple of hours on a party bus. But as long as there are enough food and drinks for that time of day, the hosts aren't wrong for having a party bus.

Its not additional hosting, it's being up front. Tacky and rude are not the same thing.

Party bus better have a bathroom on board or it doesn't meet minimum hospitality standards.

Also guests are stuck staying for the while trip. They can't just leave when they please bc they won't be where their vehicle is or where they originally started. Not telling guests they will be trapped on a party bus in advance does not meet minimum hosting standards. Yes, it's not a subpoena, but tell your guests in advance if your plans. If I was invited to a reception on a boat cruise, I'd sure as hell want to know BEFORE I accepted the inviation, not after I got there. Not being able to leave when they want to a problem.

Being trapped in a confined space with 30 people without a heads up is not proper hosting. If they know the situation and choose to come then it's all good.

If you want to be off beat and quirky, own it and tell people in advance. That's what a good host would do, not hold people hostage on a party bus without prior notice.

kimmiinthemitten

photokitty said:

Jen4948 said:

Lots of weddings, whether destination or at home, require that out-of-town guests fly in. That doesn't mean they're entitled to additional hospitality. The wedding invitation is not a subpoena. It was their choice to come. Provided there is enough food and beverage all for that time of day, the guests aren't entitled to more - regardless of how far they had to fly.

So you can side-eye the couple all you want because the reception is a couple of hours on a party bus. But as long as there are enough food and drinks for that time of day, the hosts aren't wrong for having a party bus.

Its not additional hosting, it's being up front. Tacky and rude are not the same thing.

Party bus better have a bathroom on board or it doesn't meet minimum hospitality standards.

Also guests are stuck staying for the while trip. They can't just leave when they please bc they won't be where their vehicle is or where they originally started. Not telling guests they will be trapped on a party bus in advance does not meet minimum hosting standards. Yes, it's not a subpoena, but tell your guests in advance if your plans. If I was invited to a reception on a boat cruise, I'd sure as hell want to know BEFORE I accepted the inviation, not after I got there. Not being able to leave when they want to a problem.

Being trapped in a confined space with 30 people without a heads up is not proper hosting. If they know the situation and choose to come then it's all good.

If you want to be off beat and quirky, own it and tell people in advance. That's what a good host would do, not hold people hostage on a party bus without prior notice.

Since the original question was whether or not guests should chip in, I assumed the guests were aware of the plan.  

I definitely see your point about making sure they know in advance though and agree with that. 

drunkenwitch

I'm just thinking logistics here. Trapped on a loud bus with no food, no place to pee, and no chance to step outside for air if I get overheated or overwhelmed by the noise sounds like hell to me. Even if the bus has a tiny bathroom it will be disgusting in under an hour (drunk guys + peeing in a movie vehicle = unsanitary at best).

Not to mention, who the hell wants to drink open cocktails in a moving vehicle? One slam on the breaks and you have rum and coke covering every part of your outfit and nowhere to clean up and nothing to change into until the bus drops you back at your hotel. No thank you. 

charlotte989875

I think some people are reading too much in here (although I do wish OP would come back and clarify). No where to use the bathroom? They're presumably stopping a bars on the strip. No way to leave if they get tired/bored/drunk? Cabs are everywhere in Vegas, Lyft, Uber; just like any other reception. Who the hell wants to drink in a moving vehicle? Many people, evidenced by having champagne, liquor and glass in many limos. 

I get this isn't everyone's cup of tea, but it's not wrong. Asking people to chip in would be though. 

drunkenwitch