When's to early to start planning?

Knottie1471840554

So we have finally decided what month we want to get married in, but no date yet. We want to get married in January 2018. It seems so far away! I LOVE to plan things, so I'm jumping at my feet to get the ball rolling! I've already asked my maid of honor, and she's just as excited to start planning! Is it too early to start now?? Is it to early to dress shop?

climbingsingle

January 2017? January 2018? January 2025?

Knottie1471840554

January 2018

DrillSergeantCat

It's not necessarily too early to dress shop, but it's definitely too early to buy.

eta - Wait. You told your maid of honor who she was? You didn't ask her?

theycallmelinz

Edited to rethink my response because I can't read lol

No, it's not too soon to be planning. You can start getting ideas together or what you like/don't like, and of course hanging out here to learn all you can about what has worked or didn't work for others.

Knottie1471840554

So I have the knot app, is there an app to access these forums easier? I'm doing this on my phone through Internet.

ei34

With just under a year and a half to go, it's not too early to set your budget and let your VVIPs know that you're planning on Jan 2018.  I easily planned my wedding in less than 6 months, so at least to me, it's a bit too early to do much else.  Congrats!

OliveOilsMom

Depending on your area, you may want to get your venue locked down.  If you are in a big urban area, some of the locations can book up this far out.  But being you are getting married in January, you shouldn't have much issues with finding a venue.  It's usually a slow time of year for weddings, so make sure you ask for discounts with all vendors due to this!

In demand photographers can also be booked up this far out too.

theycallmelinz

If you're on a smaller budget, use the app/website Thumbtack to find your vendors. We found our DJ and photographer this way, LOVED them, and we paid about 1/3 of what I was expecting to pay for these services. Basically it's a job site where you put in your budget and vendors bid to be able to do the job for you, and you select which one you want. 

missJeanLouise

I am 16months into an 18 month engagement. It is not too early too start planning.
Decide a budget that you and your fiance can afford. Talk about how you two plan on saving, cutting back, priorities. No one is responsible for paying for your wedding except you and your partner. If someone OFFERS know that (most of the time)  money comes with strings and Ye Who Pays Has A Say. Talk to the Giver about expectations and if they are giving you the money or paying for something directly. Don't count on money until it is in your hand.

Make a list of Must Have, VIPs. Start small. Nobody has 65 Must Haves. Having a small guest list is the #1 Best way to save money.

Start looking at venues. You get your wedding date when you book your venue. 

You can start looking at dresses but I wouldn't buy one until you have less than a year too go. Dress regret is real, wait as long as you can to buy your dress.

I know it is hard but take a deep breath. You have lots of time. Lurk here, play around with TK budget tool to figure out your budget for individual items, like how much should you spend on your venue or dress if your budget is X. Make spreadsheets, get a notebook, learn ettiquette, make some lists, have fun comparing prices and reading 100 questions to ask your DJ lists. But seriously, don't buy that dress yet.

Knottie1471840554

DrillSergeantCat said:

It's not necessarily too early to dress shop, but it's definitely too early to buy.

eta - Wait. You told your maid of honor who she was? You didn't ask her?

No. I asked her. I just used the wrong wording here. She said yes

CMGragain

OP, do NOT ask anyone else to be in your wedding party until about 9 to 10 months before your wedding.  Relationships can change.

Spend the next three month reading books on Wedding Etiquette.  I like Miss Manners Guide to a Surprisingly Dignified Wedding.  I also recommend buying Bridal Bargains:Secrets to Planning a Fantastic Wedding on a Realistic Budget.  Stay away from TV wedding porn like Say Yes to the Dress and Four Weddings!  They are completely unrealistic.  Read bridal magazines with a skeptical eye.  They want you to spend more money than you need to spend!

theycallmelinz

CMGragain said:

OP, do NOT ask anyone else to be in your wedding party until about 9 to 10 months before your wedding.  Relationships can change.

TRUE story. I learned this lesson the hard way. And you don't want to ask someone to step down from the wedding party unless you plan on not being friends anymore. 

ETA: And for Christ's sake, you don't need even sides. Just trying to share some of the wisdom I wish I had known early on in my planning!

Knottie1471840554

theycallmelinz said:

CMGragain said:

OP, do NOT ask anyone else to be in your wedding party until about 9 to 10 months before your wedding.  Relationships can change.

TRUE story. I learned this lesson the hard way. And you don't want to ask someone to step down from the wedding party unless you plan on not being friends anymore. 

ETA: And for Christ's sake, you don't need even sides. Just trying to share some of the wisdom I wish I had known early on in my planning!

Sides meaning, don't have them stand next to us?

DrillSergeantCat

Knottie1471840554 said:

Sides meaning, don't have them stand next to us?

Meaning if you want 6 and the groom wants 4, do it. It doesn't have to be an equal number of people in the party.

theycallmelinz

DrillSergeantCat said:

Knottie1471840554 said:

Sides meaning, don't have them stand next to us?

Meaning if you want 6 and the groom wants 4, do it. It doesn't have to be an equal number of people in the party.

Yes this. Sorry I was unclear

pinkcow13

Personally, I don't think there should be a rule about when to ask your bridal party. Relationships do change, but no one knows your relationship better than yourself. I've been best friends with my Maid of Honor since we were 8 and there was never any doubt about that. That's just me, though. 

Also, it's never to early to start planning! I started planning right after getting engaged (approv year and a half engagement). I was able to take my time and do tond of research, so that worked out for me. I went dress shopping 11 months out, bought the dress 9 months out.

Knottie1471840554

pinkcow13 said:

Personally, I don't think there should be a rule about when to ask your bridal party. Relationships do change, but no one knows your relationship better than yourself. I've been best friends with my Maid of Honor since we were 8 and there was never any doubt about that. That's just me, though. 

Also, it's never to early to start planning! I started planning right after getting engaged (approv year and a half engagement). I was able to take my time and do tond of research, so that worked out for me. I went dress shopping 11 months out, bought the dress 9 months out.

 My maid of honor she will for sure be my best friend until forever. Because we've known each other since six grade, just like you. She's the one person I can go to for everything, she knows more about my personal life than anyone else including my mother.  I had two friends that I was going between to ask to be my maid of honor, and I chose this girl because my other friend she gets super sensitive about things and is very emotional when things don't go her way, so I thought that was not the best choice to choose.  I just hope when I ask her to be a bridesmaid, she doesn't get upset that she's not the maid of honor. 
 Also, we already have a child together. And he's only two months old.  So I have to plan, while raising a child, while working full-time. 
Btw- we have been engaged for 2 years now and have been together for a total of 7 years. Our son was a happy surprise. Lol 

DrillSergeantCat

Knottie1471840554 said:

Also, we already have a child together. And he's only two months old.  So I have to plan, while raising a child, while working full-time. 

I work full-time, I'm a full-time student also studying for the CPA exam, have a 6 month old baby, another baby on the way, and am also planning a wedding. 

SP29

Within 18 months is a good time to start planning. You can nail down the bigger vendors- venue, DJ, and photog. You can also find a florist and baker too if you want, as usually you sign a contract for the date but don't actually choose what you want until closer.

One of the biggest benefits to planning early is that if you sign a contract, you can lock in your venue/vendor for your 2018 date at 2016 prices. You shouldn't have trouble finding vendors for January (I was also married in Jan, 2014), but would be good if you can save some money.

If you want to look at wedding dresses, go for it, but I wouldn't get too particular and definitely not buy until 8-12 months time, as new styles come out all the time so you never know if you'll find something else you like better.

Rings are an "it depends". If you're pretty set on what you want, go ahead and buy it early as a way to spread out the purchases, but if you're not sure or you are into trendy styles, I'd wait, again in case a new style comes out that you'd like better (I wanted a plain white gold band, and DH wanted a plain yellow gold band, so they were easy to shop around for a buy early).

Be flexible with your flowers for January. Out of season flowers will be more expensive, and what you get depends on what the florist can get from greenhouses. I really didn't have trouble getting a bouquet with a variety of flowers that I wanted. You have to ask around though. One florist would tell me they couldn't get X flower at that time of year, but then another florist would say that exact flower was no problem, but they couldn't get something else.

Knottie1471840554

DrillSergeantCat said:

Knottie1471840554 said:

Also, we already have a child together. And he's only two months old.  So I have to plan, while raising a child, while working full-time. 

I work full-time, I'm a full-time student also studying for the CPA exam, have a 6 month old baby, another baby on the way, and am also planning a wedding. 

I can't imagine having a 6 month old and being pregnant at the same time! I wish you all the best with both babies!

DrillSergeantCat

Knottie1471840554 said:

I can't imagine having a 6 month old and being pregnant at the same time! I wish you all the best with both babies!

I'm still trying to come to grips with it. If it weren't for the CPA exam, I would be better with it, but I just got my textbooks for the prep class yesterday and one of the 4 is 2 inches thick on letter size paper. 

MissKittyDanger

DrillSergeantCat said:

Knottie1471840554 said:

Also, we already have a child together. And he's only two months old.  So I have to plan, while raising a child, while working full-time. 

I work full-time, I'm a full-time student also studying for the CPA exam, have a 6 month old baby, another baby on the way, and am also planning a wedding. 

I knew you were a busy lady, but you might be insane jk! High achiever!

DrillSergeantCat

MissKittyDanger said:

I knew you were a busy lady, but you might be insane jk! High achiever!

No. I'm pretty sure I'm insane. 

MissKittyDanger

DrillSergeantCat said:

MissKittyDanger said:

I knew you were a busy lady, but you might be insane jk! High achiever!

No. I'm pretty sure I'm insane. 

I'm guessing your FI is really helpful at home? I hope he is! But jeez, I originally had a bunch of stuff planned this summer but I can't imagine what you're doing.
My coworker is doing an accounting course, plus has 7 & 5yr old, plus working and kids in other activities. You might all be crazy

DrillSergeantCat

MissKittyDanger said:

I'm guessing your FI is really helpful at home? I hope he is! But jeez, I originally had a bunch of stuff planned this summer but I can't imagine what you're doing.
My coworker is doing an accounting course, plus has 7 & 5yr old, plus working and kids in other activities. You might all be crazy

He is very helpful when he's home, but he works 12 hour days quite a lot. I'm really fortunate that I have a super easy job that is slow right now so I can devote time at work to studying.

Knottie1471840554

DrillSergeantCat said:

MissKittyDanger said:

I'm guessing your FI is really helpful at home? I hope he is! But jeez, I originally had a bunch of stuff planned this summer but I can't imagine what you're doing.
My coworker is doing an accounting course, plus has 7 & 5yr old, plus working and kids in other activities. You might all be crazy

He is very helpful when he's home, but he works 12 hour days quite a lot. I'm really fortunate that I have a super easy job that is slow right now so I can devote time at work to studying.

No matter how hard things are, you gotta do what you gotta do. Make those pay checks to make a living for our little ones. 

DrillSergeantCat

Knottie1471840554 said:

No matter how hard things are, you gotta do what you gotta do. Make those pay checks to make a living for our little ones. 

Absolutely. Getting those three letters behind my name increases my earning potential exponentially.