Wedding Woes

"Um, don't you have work to do?"

Dear Prudence,
This is a silly problem but it’s increasingly getting on my nerves. My co-workers can’t stop criticizing my body temperature! I wear jackets, cardigans, and scarves in the summer for a lot of reasons—to hide areas of insecurity, because the office A/C is on full blast, because they’re cute—and at first I made jokes or gave what I thought were valid explanations but it has become a daily occurrence. I think it’s extremely rude that they think repeatedly telling me to take off my sweater is a fun, appropriate, and/or interesting conversation to have with me. What do I say to make them realize I am 100 percent uninterested in their opinion of what I’m wearing?

—Chill

Re: "Um, don't you have work to do?"

  • My work BFF is in sweaters in the office year-round.  Sometimes, if she's cold enough, she has on a sweater, blanket, gloves, and earmuffs.  The temp in our building can swing wildly from time to time.  So yeah, someone wearing a sweater in the summer in an office is not odd or something to make anything out of...ever. 
    OurWildKingdomshort+sassy
  • mrsconn23 said:
    My work BFF is in sweaters in the office year-round.  Sometimes, if she's cold enough, she has on a sweater, blanket, gloves, and earmuffs.  The temp in our building can swing wildly from time to time.  So yeah, someone wearing a sweater in the summer in an office is not odd or something to make anything out of...ever. 
    Exactly. I find a lot of offices keep the building COLD, and when you're sitting in one spot at a computer all day, that cold creeps up on you.

    DH often wears pants and long sleeves to the office during the summer. I used to tease him about it (mostly because he automatically wears pants, goes outside in 30+ degree weather- that's Celsius- and then regret his decision), but it's because the office is kept so cold.
    Greenjinjo
  • DrillSergeantCatDrillSergeantCat Oklahoma City, OK member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    IDC if it's 100 outside. I almost always have on a sweater with my space heater running under my des. My coworkers have learned to leave me alone about it.
  • My coworker is always cold and constantly has a sweater. Yes we occasionally joke about it, but not always. LW needs to say something, like 'the joke is getting old guys, can we stop it?' or SOMETHING.
    OurWildKingdomshort+sassySP29
  • I have a friend (not colleague) who is always cold, and we joke with her a lot about it.  Key word "with," and we've never once told her to take anything off!  That's definitely not workplace appropriate.

    Now I've had (almost) the reverse problem.  I overheat easily, so I'd have people telling me that looking at me makes them cold or that I should wear a sweater.  But not nearly as bad as telling me to take something off.
    OurWildKingdom
  • ShesSoColdShesSoCold bend over and I'll show ya mod
    Moderator 5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its

    I wear sweaters year round. In the winter I wear multiple sweaters, in the summer I wear lighter weight ones. I literally cannot remember the last time I didn't wear a sweater of some kind to work or over something that wasn't just an oversized concert t-shirt.

    People giving me shit for it would be funny for like a minute and then I'd have to say something shitty about whatever the asshole is wearing. Like "you sure you're okay wearing horizontal stripes?"

    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
    SP29
  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom South Jersey member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    My grandma wore a sweater in 90 degree heat with humidity in the air and she had no A/C in her house.  No one ever dared to tell her to take her sweaters off!  LOL!  My mom is getting to be the same way and I can already see myself getting ready to follow in their footsteps. 

    LW should tell them once that the jokes need to stop.  She is not changing her wardrobe, so drop the subject.  If it persists, then go to HR.

    Lastly, it may be that the co-workers think that this is alright with LW because she hasn't put a stop to it before and even made jokes about it at first.  It could also be the routine these co-workers have with LW, in my office, some people always say the same thing to the same people. 

  • Honestly, if there is a breeze and/or it's 85 degrees outside or cooler, I am wearing all of the layers. 

    It's extremely inappropriate of the LW's coworkers to be making any sort of comments about her attire at all. She needs to tell them to stop and if they don't, she needs to take it directly to HR.
    DrillSergeantCat
  • kimmiinthemittenkimmiinthemitten Detroit, MI member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    This one year old article was just floating around my FB news feed and scientifically explains why women are colder than men in most offices:

    http://fortune.com/2015/08/03/women-office-freezing-cold/
    image
    scrunchythiefcharlotte989875sparklepants41
  • I wear sweaters because 1) it's Colorado, it'll be 50 on the way to work, and 80 on the way home, and 2) they're easily removable when I get too hot. I can't understand why anyone is making anything out of this. She has some weird-ass coworkers, yo. 

    image
    charlotte989875sparklepants41
  • sounds like the coworkers need a collective "ho sit down" card. 

    I run warm, so I'm almost always in short sleeves or sleeveless (still professional) tops or dresses. Sometimes with my fan on. A couple of my cube neighbors are always freezing. There is always banter in our group about the temperature in the office. The office management group bought everyone blankets last year for our safety milestone celebration - mine has yet to be unwrapped, cube neighbor is usually bundled in hers. 
    kimmiinthemittenSP29
  • 75? I'd change that thermostat. Sweaty. 
    image
    crowsgirl15SP29
  • baconsmom said:
    75? I'd change that thermostat. Sweaty. 
    75 is the coolest I can tolerate without my extremities going numb. I would prefer 78.
    LadyCatherineDB
  • Fortunately...FOR ONCE...where I currently sit at work, it is very comfortable all year long.

    Previously, I'd usually be dressed the WARMEST in the office, during the 100 degree summers we have.  Apparently, since it is so hot outside, that somehow equates to dropping it down to the 60s inside.  And then I'd be freezing all day and sneezing.

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  • baconsmom said:
    75? I'd change that thermostat. Sweaty. 
    75 is the coolest I can tolerate without my extremities going numb. I would prefer 78.
    Are you my sister?  Sweet lord I sweat my ass off in her house during the summer. 

    I need to basically freeze when I'm sleeping or else I will wake up sweaty and pissed. 
    crowsgirl15cowgirl8238
  • baconsmom said:
    75? I'd change that thermostat. Sweaty. 
    Agreed. I keep my house at 68 year round, and I'm still hot a lot of the time.


  • My parents' house is always super hot and they were a last minute location change to host my baby shower this past Sunday. My mom was like "I turned it all the way down to 72" with this look of horror thinking of her electric bill I guess. I was like uhhh mom it's gonna get hot in here with a bunch of people, I turned it down more and turned on a fan and was still sweating (granted I get hot if I'm nervous/anxious so a party in my honor lead to sweating even though I wasn't really nervous)
  • I briefly dated a guy who was a recent transplant from Michigan.  He kept his house SO cold!!!  My nose and hands were cold.  I'd almost be shivering.  I even spied on his thermostat once and it was set in the low 60s.

    Y'all, I finally decided that was a deal breaker.  I'm not kidding.  That's fine for a casual fling, but I was in "looking for an LTR, hopefully leading to spouse" mode at the time.  I'm more of a "high 70s" girl myself.  A 15 degree temperature comfort difference?  I already saw the writing on the wall, lol.

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    DrillSergeantCatSP29kimmiinthemittencowgirl8238
  • lyndausvilyndausvi Western Slope, Colorado mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its




    When I read this letter, this is what I imagine.     I would totally be one of those people who would side-eye, make fun of the person.   


    I'm mean like that.  I wouldn't do it for hours at a time, everyday for years.   But, yeah I would be like really?  Then move on.

    At home my office is not heated.   I had to bust at the space heater last week because it  gets no sunlight and has been getting down into the high 30's at  night.   I wear a sweater/sweatshirt/light jacket pretty much every day year round.  Sometimes a scarf (both fashionable and practical).   







    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
    crowsgirl15samm1225
  • DrillSergeantCatDrillSergeantCat Oklahoma City, OK member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    lyndausvi said:




    When I read this letter, this is what I imagine.     I would totally be one of those people who would side-eye, make fun of the person.   


    I'm mean like that.  I wouldn't do it for hours at a time, everyday for years.   But, yeah I would be like really?  Then move on.

    At home my office is not heated.   I had to bust at the space heater last week because it  gets no sunlight and has been getting down into the high 30's at  night.   I wear a sweater/sweatshirt/light jacket pretty much every day year round.  Sometimes a scarf (both fashionable and practical).   

    Why make fun of someone who's going out of their way to make themselves comfortable so that you're not, though? Would you prefer this person turn the thermostat up to a temperature that makes them comfortable thereby making you miserable? 
    OurWildKingdomSP29
  • lyndausvi said:




    When I read this letter, this is what I imagine.     I would totally be one of those people who would side-eye, make fun of the person.   


    I'm mean like that.  I wouldn't do it for hours at a time, everyday for years.   But, yeah I would be like really?  Then move on.

    At home my office is not heated.   I had to bust at the space heater last week because it  gets no sunlight and has been getting down into the high 30's at  night.   I wear a sweater/sweatshirt/light jacket pretty much every day year round.  Sometimes a scarf (both fashionable and practical).   

    I have been this woman. I used to work in an office of all men and they used to keep it year round at 65. It also didn't help that I sat right by the door so anytime anyone came in, wind and snow would blow in come winter. I actually had gloves I could type in.
    DrillSergeantCat
  • DrillSergeantCatDrillSergeantCat Oklahoma City, OK member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    I have been this woman. I used to work in an office of all men and they used to keep it year round at 65. It also didn't help that I sat right by the door so anytime anyone came in, wind and snow would blow in come winter. I actually had gloves I could type in.
    My hands are so small that even XS gloves are too big. I wish I could find gloves small enough I could type in. I crocheted myself some fingerless gloves last year. 
    TrixieJessLadyCatherineDBcowgirl8238
  • I have been this woman. I used to work in an office of all men and they used to keep it year round at 65. It also didn't help that I sat right by the door so anytime anyone came in, wind and snow would blow in come winter. I actually had gloves I could type in.
    My hands are so small that even XS gloves are too big. I wish I could find gloves small enough I could type in. I crocheted myself some fingerless gloves last year. 
    I used to wear silk riding gloves. My best friend is a riding instructor and she picked them up for me at the local tack shop. They cover your fingers and you can type with them.
    DrillSergeantCat
  • @mrsconn23 I am the same - I need to have it cold when I sleep or I'll wake up in the middle of the night. When my family comes to visit me in the winter, they keep their coats on because apparently I keep my house freezing.  I find 16/17 C comfy!  My poor husband, though ... in the winter he wears his housecoat over his clothes.  

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