Wednesday!

bleve0821

Heffalump said:

AtomicBlonde said:

Heffalump said:

AtomicBlonde said:

@Heffalump, NC.

No way, me too!

Heffalump

charlotte989875 said:

Is emeals expensive? I've thought about doing Blue Apron a few nights a week, but it seems too expensive for what it's worth. And I can shop and chop things, I just like the idea of really easy recipes. 

Also the bolded is exactly how I feel. H cooked and cleaned for himself before we were married, that wasn't changing. I do think my best friend (and my MIL) are surprised at how much work they think I "make" him do**, but we work in the same field with the same hours. Why should I do more housework?

**I don't make him do anything. We settled into this routine when we started living together, I'm the better cook so he does dishes and we clean together on weekend. No one makes the other do anything. As if we could always. 

I have to say, DH is pretty good about our current level of housework* (his aversion to cleaning-cleaning as opposed to decluttering/straightening was instrumental to us hiring someone for that stuff, but that's a whole other story and a settled issue at this point).  But for some reason, as soon as we were married, his mother blamed me if he forgot to call his sister on her birthday or send his great-aunt flowers or whatever.  Because it was supposedly now my "job" to take care of that for him.  Nope.  If he wants to send his great-aunt flowers, his dialing fingers work just as well as mine.  (I make exceptions, of course--when we're doing Christmas, if we decide to send all of the aunts/uncles/siblings food from somewhere, I'll do all the orders at once.  Or when his cousin died, he was swamped and it was slow by me, so I took care of sending flowers.) 

*Notwithstanding the fact that he got something on his shirt yesterday and came home and decided to douse it with Oxy spray directly on top of the dryer, so that when I got home and went to get DS's favorite pants out of the dryer I found a dress shirt marinating in a gooey puddle of Oxy that he swears he was "eventually going to get around to."  Grrrrrrrrrr.  So then he was butthurt when I asked (all right, told) him to clean it up sooner, rather than later, lest he forget about it and it get all gummy and sticky and attract lint and get on our clean clothes, etc.  Wooz looked at me and shook her head like "Men, amirite?"  Keep that bar high, kiddo.

kimmiinthemitten

@charlotte989875. Not really, at least for us. Pre EMeals I was spending over a hundred dollars a week on groceries because I was googling recipes, buying the ingredients, using them once, rinse repeat. 

We pay $30/3 month subscription and about 100/week for groceries including FI's lunch and breakfast and my protein bars. They have a budget friendly plan too that ties into the sales at your local grocery stores. For us, it's a money and time saver and the food is almost always really really good. 

They also have a great app for grocery shopping too!

ShesSoCold

Heffalump said:

charlotte989875 said:

Is emeals expensive? I've thought about doing Blue Apron a few nights a week, but it seems too expensive for what it's worth. And I can shop and chop things, I just like the idea of really easy recipes. 

Also the bolded is exactly how I feel. H cooked and cleaned for himself before we were married, that wasn't changing. I do think my best friend (and my MIL) are surprised at how much work they think I "make" him do**, but we work in the same field with the same hours. Why should I do more housework?

**I don't make him do anything. We settled into this routine when we started living together, I'm the better cook so he does dishes and we clean together on weekend. No one makes the other do anything. As if we could always. 

I have to say, DH is pretty good about our current level of housework* (his aversion to cleaning-cleaning as opposed to decluttering/straightening was instrumental to us hiring someone for that stuff, but that's a whole other story and a settled issue at this point).  But for some reason, as soon as we were married, his mother blamed me if he forgot to call his sister on her birthday or send his great-aunt flowers or whatever.  Because it was supposedly now my "job" to take care of that for him.  Nope.  If he wants to send his great-aunt flowers, his dialing fingers work just as well as mine.  (I make exceptions, of course--when we're doing Christmas, if we decide to send all of the aunts/uncles/siblings food from somewhere, I'll do all the orders at once.  Or when his cousin died, he was swamped and it was slow by me, so I took care of sending flowers.) 

*Notwithstanding the fact that he got something on his shirt yesterday and came home and decided to douse it with Oxy spray directly on top of the dryer, so that when I got home and went to get DS's favorite pants out of the dryer I found a dress shirt marinating in a gooey puddle of Oxy that he swears he was "eventually going to get around to."  Grrrrrrrrrr.  So then he was butthurt when I asked (all right, told) him to clean it up sooner, rather than later, lest he forget about it and it get all gummy and sticky and attract lint and get on our clean clothes, etc.  Wooz looked at me and shook her head like "Men, amirite?"  Keep that bar high, kiddo.

My MIL is like that too - "make sure he calls his grandma!" or when he had some gross-ass foot issue (thank you H for not telling me about it since I have an irrational fear of feet), she called me to "make sure he takes care of it". I responded with, "Hey, I'm not his mother."

He is a grown ass man and can and does take care of himself.

CharmedPam

charlotte989875 said:

kimmiinthemitten said:

Hi everyone!  Yesterday I had my second dress fitting - and I'm actually getting excited about my dress!  It looks so much better properly fitted, but I don't think my best friend likes it.  It's a poofier dress than I wanted, so I'm not sure if she actually doesn't like or wants to hear my thoughts first.  Whatevs, I feel good in it - finally!

Now if only those engagement pics could back in.....I'm obsessively checking my gmail!

Hugs @Heffalump, after asking for a break yesterday, I know being in the hospital is the last thing your mental health needed today.

@lyndausvi glad for the good news!  I don't think I could do 2 days without talking either!

@sparklepants41 hopefully she takes a turn soon!

Onto the cooking, we grocery shop together on Sundays or Mondays.  We use a meal planning service called eMeals and love it!  They organize the grocery list for us, and provide us with 7 dinner recipes.  Unless the recipe calls for a crock pot, they rarely take more than 30 minutes start to finish.  They also have options you can choose from; we're on the low calorie meal so everything is under 500 calories. I do all of the cooking, although sometimes he'll help me chop or stir - and he does the dishes.  But I put my foot down on this early.  My sister says I'm too hard on FI but I did not agree to move in with a grown ass man who kept a clean apartment just to become his maid.  He's a teacher, and as such I'll do extra work around the house when he's in his coaching season, but you best believe when it's summer I fully expect to do very little.

Is emeals expensive? I've thought about doing Blue Apron a few nights a week, but it seems too expensive for what it's worth. And I can shop and chop things, I just like the idea of really easy recipes. 

Also the bolded is exactly how I feel. H cooked and cleaned for himself before we were married, that wasn't changing. I do think my best friend (and my MIL) are surprised at how much work they think I "make" him do**, but we work in the same field with the same hours. Why should I do more housework?

**I don't make him do anything. We settled into this routine when we started living together, I'm the better cook so he does dishes and we clean together on weekend. No one makes the other do anything. As if we could always. 

to some, it may be.  To us, it's not.  We went from eating out a lot and probably spending what the meal delivery costed in tips alone!  It averages $10/plate.  The meals range form easy - intermediate - difficult and we mostly get the first two.  You do chop most stuff though.   We hate grocery shopping so this works for us.  Especially trying to find the not so common items like the spices and herbs they provide. 

lyndausvi

ShesSoCold said:

Heffalump said:

charlotte989875 said:

Is emeals expensive? I've thought about doing Blue Apron a few nights a week, but it seems too expensive for what it's worth. And I can shop and chop things, I just like the idea of really easy recipes. 

Also the bolded is exactly how I feel. H cooked and cleaned for himself before we were married, that wasn't changing. I do think my best friend (and my MIL) are surprised at how much work they think I "make" him do**, but we work in the same field with the same hours. Why should I do more housework?

**I don't make him do anything. We settled into this routine when we started living together, I'm the better cook so he does dishes and we clean together on weekend. No one makes the other do anything. As if we could always. 

I have to say, DH is pretty good about our current level of housework* (his aversion to cleaning-cleaning as opposed to decluttering/straightening was instrumental to us hiring someone for that stuff, but that's a whole other story and a settled issue at this point).  But for some reason, as soon as we were married, his mother blamed me if he forgot to call his sister on her birthday or send his great-aunt flowers or whatever.  Because it was supposedly now my "job" to take care of that for him.  Nope.  If he wants to send his great-aunt flowers, his dialing fingers work just as well as mine.  (I make exceptions, of course--when we're doing Christmas, if we decide to send all of the aunts/uncles/siblings food from somewhere, I'll do all the orders at once.  Or when his cousin died, he was swamped and it was slow by me, so I took care of sending flowers.) 

*Notwithstanding the fact that he got something on his shirt yesterday and came home and decided to douse it with Oxy spray directly on top of the dryer, so that when I got home and went to get DS's favorite pants out of the dryer I found a dress shirt marinating in a gooey puddle of Oxy that he swears he was "eventually going to get around to."  Grrrrrrrrrr.  So then he was butthurt when I asked (all right, told) him to clean it up sooner, rather than later, lest he forget about it and it get all gummy and sticky and attract lint and get on our clean clothes, etc.  Wooz looked at me and shook her head like "Men, amirite?"  Keep that bar high, kiddo.

My MIL is like that too - "make sure he calls his grandma!" or when he had some gross-ass foot issue (thank you H for not telling me about it since I have an irrational fear of feet), she called me to "make sure he takes care of it". I responded with, "Hey, I'm not his mother."

He is a grown ass man and can and does take care of himself.

Ugh.   In a similar note I was taken aside by one of his friend's wives on how MIL was disappointed that DH forgot something (mother's day, maybe?).  Anyway, I was like "umm, he was a 37 year old grown ass-never been married man when I married him.  Just because he has a wife doesn't mean I took over being his social secretary .  I take care of my family he takes care of his. "  


She was shocked.  And I get it to a point.  Traditionally the wife has been the social secretary of the family.  They make the plans, send out the gifts, etc.  But don't yell at me because a grown-ass man didn't call his mom.     In my family we work together.  We both remind each other of things.  We both often buy gifts for family.  Sometimes he will find a gift for my dad first.  Or I find his mom's.   It's very fluid.