Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

Snuggling the Night Before the Big Day?

Hey ladies!
I was reading an article on The Knot where the tradition of the bride and groom sleeping separated the night before the wedding is fading away.

My fiance and I have a little less than a year until our wedding, plenty of time, thank goodness! (We start official wedding planning in January, yay!  <3  )
We just want advice why or why not to snuggle the night before we tie the knot! :)

Re: Snuggling the Night Before the Big Day?

  • We didn't spend the night together but it was only because he was going out with his GM and I wanted to go to bed early. For us it was a big deal thing for us to spend the night before our wedding apart and we lived together for a while by that point. Had he not been going out we would have spent the night in the hotel together. 
  • Your wedding is in a YEAR!!! If you think seeing each other the morning of your wedding will doom your marriage, don't do it. If not, it's just about convenience and your own personal preference. 
  • We spent the night together and then got ready separately in the morning and went separately to the venue.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • H and I did sleep together the night before our wedding.  We lived together and both wanted a good night's sleep, and we both sleep best in our own bed.  
  • We slept separately the night before, but that was more to do with each of us being out with our friends the night before and the morning of schedule- easier for me to already be at my mom's.
  • I'm not married yet, (July!) but I can't imagine that we would not spend the night before the wedding together.  We live together, we sleep well together, and I can't imagine either of us wanting to wake up on our wedding day without the other.
  • We slept together and even got ready together and left to meet the photographer together! We got married after we took pictures to avoid having to drag our families around Brooklyn. 

    I wanted to spend the entire day with my fiancé-turned-husband, and that included waking up together. Plus, like others have said we both sleep best in our own bed, so why risk someone not getting a good night's sleep for a silly tradition that isn't relevant now that a lot of couples are living together before marriage? 
  • Man,  you are really taking on things you don't need to worry about yet. I don't think I even considered this until maybe 3 months before. 

    We spent the night before the wedding together. It seemed silly to spend it apart. Also, it would have meant either renting another room, or having H sleep in someone else's room. Totally ridiculous and not necessary. 
  • We stayed in separate rooms because DH is an early riser and I planned on sleeping until the last possible moment.
    ~*~*~*~*~

  • We slept in separate places.  Me at the rental house with my family.  He was with his family at the hotel (slept in his mom's room).   I think for us it was more that we live far from our families and just enjoyed spending the extra time with them on our own.  

    Basically we divided and conquered.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • Don't overthink this. If you want to sleep together, do it. If you don't, don't. Easy. Check it off your list of things to think about and move on. 

    We lived together before the wedding, so spending the night together was no big deal. We got ready separately and met up at the ceremony. 
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  • We were together the night before. We had been together for 8 years, living together for 4 so I didn't see the point of being apart. I had a friend who was in a similar situation as me and they were not together the night before (by choice). I don't think any decision is wrong or right.
  • I stayed at the hotel the night before with my best friend and he went back to the house. It was more of a logistical decision than it was emotional. Although I really enjoyed drinking wine, eating cheesecake and watching Friends with my BFF the night before too. 
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  • I am planning to be separate the night before.  One reason is because I will be staying at a hotel that will be getting ready in the next morning, where as he will be sleeping a little later I'm sure. also, I am probably going to be a anxious wreck and will need some relaxing time with my MOH the night before.
    I like the traditionalism in it too ! ;-) 


  • I am planning to be separate the night before.  One reason is because I will be staying at a hotel that will be getting ready in the next morning, where as he will be sleeping a little later I'm sure. also, I am probably going to be a anxious wreck and will need some relaxing time with my MOH the night before.
    I like the traditionalism in it too ! ;-) 


    The night before your wedding or your PPD?


  • I am planning to be separate the night before.  One reason is because I will be staying at a hotel that will be getting ready in the next morning, where as he will be sleeping a little later I'm sure. also, I am probably going to be a anxious wreck and will need some relaxing time with my MOH the night before.
    I like the traditionalism in it too ! ;-) 


    He's going to be your husband at that point, so I don't see what the big deal is even if you are trying to be traditional. 
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  • I am planning to be separate the night before.  One reason is because I will be staying at a hotel that will be getting ready in the next morning, where as he will be sleeping a little later I'm sure. also, I am probably going to be a anxious wreck and will need some relaxing time with my MOH the night before.
    I like the traditionalism in it too ! ;-) 


    Do you mean the night before your courthouse wedding or the night before your ppd? If it's before your ppd, why? You're already married. If it's before your legal wedding, why? You don't have much "getting ready" to do. This makes no sense.






  • I am planning to be separate the night before.  One reason is because I will be staying at a hotel that will be getting ready in the next morning, where as he will be sleeping a little later I'm sure. also, I am probably going to be a anxious wreck and will need some relaxing time with my MOH the night before.
    I like the traditionalism in it too ! ;-) 




    Do you mean the night before your courthouse wedding or the night before your ppd? If it's before your ppd, why? You're already married. If it's before your legal wedding, why? You don't have much "getting ready" to do. This makes no sense.


    Or anything to be anxious about, because, you know, you already made the commitment.


    "And when they use our atoms to make new lives, they won’t just be able to take one, they’ll have to take two, one of you and one of me..."
    --Philip Pullman

  • Do you think she'll have to sleep apart from her husband before their kid's first birthday party or before a friend's wedding shower that she's throwing?
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