Wedding Etiquette Forum

Bridesmaids Hair and Makeup

Hi guys!

I am looking for some advice. I recently got priced around $150 for hair and makeup for each girl. I live in New Jersey, so although I know that's an expensive tag, locally, it's not really that crazy, considering they are coming to my parents' house to do our hair and makeup. 

Anyway, I feel bad asking the girls to spend that much money. I have them renting their dresses instead of buying them (here's looking at your, Rent the Runway), letting them wear whatever shoes they want as long as it's the same color, not asking them to get their nails done, etc. I would 100% rather they pay $150 for hair and makeup than give us money/a gift. I look at it like, although it's 1 day for them, I will forever look at these pictures and would rather have their hair and makeup professionally done.

TL;DR: Is it crazy to ask my bridesmaids to spend that kind of money on hair and makeup?

Best Answers

Answers

  • Thank you! That's what I was thinking...
    short+sassy
  • This is certainly just my opinion and perhaps my own bad experiences, but I've usually found hair stylists and MAs to be a waste of money.  Especially if you're talking about $150-$200.  I have little talent in either of those areas, lol, but get better or similar results just doing it myself.

    For example, my hair stylist (who is awesome) had an emergency the night before my wedding and set me up with another stylist from her salon.  On the day of, after 5-10 minutes of "nicely" arguing with her about "the plan", she refused to listen to me...about my OWN HAIR...and I was starting to get on the precipice of being angry on my wedding day.  So I let it go.  All my curls fell out within the hour...long before my ceremony started...and that was a thoroughly wasted 120 bucks.

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    lizybeffInLoveInQueens
  • It's fine to offer this, but not to require it. 
    short+sassycowgirl8238
  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic Indiana member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I would just send an email to everyone letting them know that you don't care whether they get their hair and/or makeup done, but that if they want to, here's how much it will cost. Let them know that whether they decide to get hair done or not, they can still hang out and get ready together.

    That'll ensure they don't feel obligated or left out if they can't swing the cost.
    This is what DD did with her BMs. All of them had their hair done while none of them had their makeup done. I, on the other hand, had my makeup done since I thought I would be in a lot of pictures. I did not have my hair done because I thought the cost was ridiculous for my short hair cut (takes 5 mins. or less to dry/style).
    Knottie1452098987
  • Ditto @OliveOilsMom break down the price for each service individually so they can pick and choose which service(s) they want.  
    For my own wedding, I emailed my BP letting them know the price per service (hair and MU both came to my parents' house where I got ready) and asked that they let me know by X date if they'd be interested.   If you're requiring they have professional hair and MU, you have to pay.
    Im in NYC- $150 for both is an awesome price! 
    DrillSergeantCat
  • levioosalevioosa Southern California member
    Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Ditto PPs.  You can't require this unless you pay for it.  After being in a few weddings there is no way in hell I'd spend that much for hair and makeup.  It turns out I'm actually really good with makeup.  Hair, yeah, I'd pay for that, because I do approximately 2 things with my hair and neither are good for formal events, but I'd be irritated spending $75 on something I could do easily myself.


    image
    DrillSergeantCatPrettyGirlLostKnottie1452098987
  • Even if you were paying for it, it should still be up to your bridesmaids as to whether or not they want the services; it's still their hair and face and no one should have a say as to what they do with it.
    cowgirl8238ViczaesarInLoveInQueensPrettyGirlLost
  • For my own wedding, I got my hair done at a salon academy for $20, and did my own make up. 

    When I was in my "best friends" wedding, she "required" us to have our hair and make up done. She told us she was paying for both, and then on the day of we found out she was only paying for our make up and not our hair, after we were all already at the salon with appointments. I paid $60 to get my hair done for her wedding, and it did not even look as good as my $20 hair for my wedding. Although she did pay for the make up artist and it was fine, I still felt like it was a waste of money, and I could have done the same thing myself (and again I think that my make up that I did myself for my own wedding looked better). I am still pissed about the hair, as if I would have known I was going to have to pay $60 to get this done, I would not have went to this salon. This wasn't the only issue I had with her wedding, and our friendship has not been the same since.

    Please do not try to force people to pay for the hair and make up you want, and I also agree with PPs that a make up artist is a waste of money (unless you are not comfortable doing your own make up, which again, should be left up to the individual!).


  • lovesclimbinglovesclimbing Alaska member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    I would not be a fan of being required to pay $150 for hair and makeup. I have also never spent that much on a wedding gift (often closer to 1/3-1/2 of that) so saying it would be instead of a wedding present is essentially deciding your WP's gift budget for them. 

    For your photos, do you really think you and other people will notice in the years to come that the WP doesn't have pro services or if only some of them do? I've never had pro services at a wedding (not even my own!) and I've been a bridesmaid once and maid of honor twice. In all the photos, I think we look pretty darn good and I don't think you can tell it's not professionally done. Usually, we'd help each other with hair and do our own makeup. 
    cowgirl8238
  • Yeah, if you're requiring it, you have to pay for it.  I much prefer the route of having the BMs do their own thing and then meeting up once everyone is done before the ceremony.  When my SIL got married this is what they did and it worked really well.  Having a single HS and MUA takes FOREVER when you are working with multiple women.  My hair alone can take up to 45 minutes, and my SILs wedding day look took over 2 hours from start to finish!!!!

    I personally would never pay for professional make-up, but I would probably pay to get my hair done depending on the formality of the wedding (as in I can do a casual look, but not a fancier up-do!).

    PrettyGirlLost
  • edited January 2017
    Hi guys!

    I am looking for some advice. I recently got priced around $150 for hair and makeup for each girl. I live in New Jersey, so although I know that's an expensive tag, locally, it's not really that crazy, considering they are coming to my parents' house to do our hair and makeup. 

    Anyway, I feel bad asking the girls to spend that much money. I have them renting their dresses instead of buying them (here's looking at your, Rent the Runway), letting them wear whatever shoes they want as long as it's the same color, not asking them to get their nails done, etc. I would 100% rather they pay $150 for hair and makeup than give us money/a gift. I look at it like, although it's 1 day for them, I will forever look at these pictures and would rather have their hair and makeup professionally done.

    TL;DR: Is it crazy to ask my bridesmaids to spend that kind of money on hair and makeup?
    Yes. It's crazy. You can't dictate how people spend their money. I personally would be okay spending that amount, but I know many people who would not. And I am VERY picky with how I like my makeup done and the products I will allow on my face. 

    To the bolded: that's an obnoxious attitude about your nearest and dearest friends.
    charlotte989875Jen4948InLoveInQueensPrettyGirlLost
  • Thank you! That's what I was leaning towards :)
  • Thank you for posting this question, I've been wondering about this! I think you should offer it to them as a service, but not make it mandatory. That way they can have the option if they want. Or maybe say you'd love to have the experience of everyone getting ready together and offer to pay half for each girl, that way it's more affordable but you won't be completely out of pocket and you'll feel good about your girls all having that professional finish - otherwise some girls might go the more natural route and others do more makeup, etc.

    At the end of the day try to remember that whatever you decide you love them and they love you, and in twenty years it won't matter as much about the makeup - it's the relationship. I feel you though, I would prefer my girls have the professional finish as well, but it may not work out that way. 
  • lovesclimbinglovesclimbing Alaska member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    Thank you for posting this question, I've been wondering about this! I think you should offer it to them as a service, but not make it mandatory. That way they can have the option if they want. Or maybe say you'd love to have the experience of everyone getting ready together and offer to pay half for each girl, that way it's more affordable but you won't be completely out of pocket and you'll feel good about your girls all having that professional finish - otherwise some girls might go the more natural route and others do more makeup, etc.

    At the end of the day try to remember that whatever you decide you love them and they love you, and in twenty years it won't matter as much about the makeup - it's the relationship. I feel you though, I would prefer my girls have the professional finish as well, but it may not work out that way. 
    To the bolded, you do realize this will likely happen even with professional makeup services, right? I sincerely hope you would not make all your bridesmaids wear the exact same look! 

    As to the rest, it's still rude to make the bridesmaids get their hair and makeup done even if you pay half the cost. You are welcome to offer to pay half if they choose to get the services, but it needs to be very obvious that it is optional, and they can still choose to do their own. 
    AddieCakeSP29cowgirl8238DrillSergeantCat
  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    Thank you for posting this question, I've been wondering about this! I think you should offer it to them as a service, but not make it mandatory. That way they can have the option if they want. Or maybe say you'd love to have the experience of everyone getting ready together and offer to pay half for each girl, that way it's more affordable but you won't be completely out of pocket and you'll feel good about your girls all having that professional finish - otherwise some girls might go the more natural route and others do more makeup, etc.

    At the end of the day try to remember that whatever you decide you love them and they love you, and in twenty years it won't matter as much about the makeup - it's the relationship. I feel you though, I would prefer my girls have the professional finish as well, but it may not work out that way. 
    So what?
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
  • edited January 2017

    I'm also in NJ and wedding hair and makeup costs seem to be anywhere from $50 to $125 per service.  

     

    I’m getting married in a few months and this is my approach with hair/makeup: I'm not making hair and makeup mandatory, but the services are available if they want them and I'm offering to pay for my bridesmaid’s shoes or for them to get their hair done. 

     

    In my case, two of the bridesmaids took the shoe offer and the rest took the hair offer. A few of them are opting to get their makeup done professionally and the rest are doing their makeup on their own.

    SP29
  • If you require makeup/hair done, you should definitely cover it. If it's an option, they are welcome to do so, but have to pay on their own. For example, I opted out of makeup, so I'm not going to pay for their makeup services after giving them the option. All of us are getting hair done so I will cover it.
  • I haven't read everyone's responses here...too long :) So I apologize if this has already been said. For my wedding, I am covering the cost of their hair because I'm requiring it to be done. I texted everyone to ask them if they wanted their hair and makeup done as well, letting them know that I would be paying for their hair, and if they want it done they will have to pay for it themselves, and let them know the price. Every single person opted to have their makeup done. I think if you cover one thing, it would help them a lot and make them choosing to get the other thing done an easier decision. 
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