October 2017 Weddings

Cold feet?? Should I be doing this ?

Im 30, we've been engaged now for 2 months and I'm tired of planning this and paying all these deposits. It's one after another, all theses details and the more I've been planning the less I want to continue. I work a second job and that money was going towards fixing up my house , but now it's all going to the wedding. (-He has his own house) I told my fiancé he needed to get a second job but he said he would try and that his mother offered to pay. ( something that I'm not ok with, and I told him that) 
He is close with his family and I really don't have much family ( my parents passed away in my 20s) , so the weekly family dinners is something new for me even after being together for a year now.

The more I plan the it seems the more adjatuated I become it seems. Our sex life is so boring. He's lacks confidence ( he's a healthy weight) and is not stimulating if we have a conversation. We can have a meal and it's alway the same questions / format. 
Is this somthing to look forward to? Or am I just hyper sensitive with wedding planning?? Maybe we just need to elope? 

Re: Cold feet?? Should I be doing this ?

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    My best advice would be to ask yourself if you would be doing this if you were not going to be having a party and if you can see a future beyond the wedding date.  
    If you answered yes, then it's probably just nerves and stress. If the answers are no, then you probably should not be walking down the aisle. Regardless, I'd suggest a conversation with him to address your concerns and tell him how you feel. Especially with sex and communication, they're such important parts of a relationship. You both need to be satisfied and it doesn't seem like you are. 
    The other thing to consider is if you think it will ever improve. How was it before you get engaged? Remember that actions speak louder than words; if you talk to him and he says he'll do better, watch to see if he actually does. 
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    Cold feet are normal and planning (and paying) is painful and frustrating... I think you may need to ask yourself what was it that made you want to marry him?  Maybe couple's counseling is a good idea.  Especially to talk about things like his family, which once you're married will be your family.  If things like this annoy you now, they won't go away when you're married and you may need to sort whether you want or need to adjust your view  or if you're expecting him to leave his family in the dust.
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