Snarky Brides

The most 'zilla of the bridezillas?

http://gawker.com/5948725/reasons-why-you-cannot-be-a-bridesmaid

This is from 2012, but I had not seen it before. I wonder how deep into her bench she had to go to find 10 people who would stand up with her under these kinds of demands.
thisismynickname2lnixon8Heffalumpcowgirl8238OurWildKingdom

Re: The most 'zilla of the bridezillas?

  • I loved this one because she expected them to go to three different destinations like it was nothing. 
    short+sassy
  • Holy. F*ing. Shit.  Please tell me this is fake.  Please, someone, just tell me it was made up to be the most ridiculous thing conceivable, as a farce, as a satire on how bridezillas can come across to their wedding party.

    Oh it's not? FML

    OurWildKingdom
  • I wish there was a follow up article after the wedding. Does anyone know if this exists? 
    OurWildKingdomgeebee908ei34
  • What are the odds the couple is divorced?
    sparklepants41
  • bleve0821bleve0821 The Shire member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    I think my favorite part is that the bride needed the brideslaves to essentially account for every weekend for 6 whole months leading up to the wedding, and that those plans are not subject to change because if "you cant make one of the parties then we have to find someone else."  

    "Sorry your great-aunt Mae who practically raised you died, but you can't go to her funeral that weekend because you have to be in Vegas for my bachelorette party.  And if you don't come, you're out."

    If that wasn't a red flag, I dunno what was for those poor girls.


    "And when they use our atoms to make new lives, they won’t just be able to take one, they’ll have to take two, one of you and one of me..."
    --Philip Pullman

    cowgirl8238sparklepants41OurWildKingdom
  • Yes, at least she gave them plenty of opportunity to run. Anyone who went along with it deserved what they got, I would think.

    I also liked that they were her most dear friends but let them know in the next breath that they would be replaced in a heartbeat.
    mollybarker11short+sassy
  • flantasticflantastic The Midwest member
    Eighth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I did see this a while ago, but thanks for the reminder. I just don't understand how she thought she'd find 10 people (originals or replacements) who would commit to the entirety of that madness. You can't be BFFs with that many people who are willing to have no lives outside of you.
  • you're.....not your

    omg
    sparklepants41SameLer5Ever
  • thefanciestbecklerthefanciestbeckler Chattanooga, TN member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer

    Holy. Shit.

    The grammar, the run on sentences, the spelling, the sheer bitchiness.....


    OurWildKingdomsparklepants41cowgirl8238short+sassy
  • OurWildKingdomOurWildKingdom in the 216 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    edited February 2017
    Wow. Just wow. The sense of entitlement is disgusting.
    thefanciestbeckler
  • KnotYetTiedKnotYetTied member
    10 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited February 2017
    I'm dying to know if she actually had any bridesmaids after that. Tbh, even the sister should have dropped out and just disowned her as family at that point.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    OurWildKingdom
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    I like the part where she asks for everyone's itinerary when going out of town from February to August.  What if I had a unplanned weekend getaway?  Would I have to send that to her....or the whole party and CC "L"? 



    OurWildKingdomshort+sassy
  • OurWildKingdomOurWildKingdom in the 216 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    I like the part where she asks for everyone's itinerary when going out of town from February to August.  What if I had a unplanned weekend getaway?  Would I have to send that to her....or the whole party and CC "L"? 


    What if someone <gasp> dies and I have to go to the funeral? 
  • I like the part where she asks for everyone's itinerary when going out of town from February to August.  What if I had a unplanned weekend getaway?  Would I have to send that to her....or the whole party and CC "L"? 


    What if someone <gasp> dies and I have to go to the funeral? 
    Then forget about being a bridesmaid if you choose that over the bride.
    OurWildKingdomsparklepants41cowgirl8238InLoveInQueens
  • I'm surprised the bridezilla didn't add that all her BMs need to stay celibate until 2-3 months before the wedding.  #NoPreggoBridesmaids.

    Along those lines, that they all need to stay within 5 lbs. of the weight they were when asked to be in the WP.  And there will be monthly weigh-ins.  Fail one weigh-in, you're out.

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    OurWildKingdomsparklepants41SP29
  • I'm surprised the bridezilla didn't add that all her BMs need to stay celibate until 2-3 months before the wedding.  #NoPreggoBridesmaids.

    Along those lines, that they all need to stay within 5 lbs. of the weight they were when asked to be in the WP.  And there will be monthly weigh-ins.  Fail one weigh-in, you're out.

    This made me snort laugh. I pictured a line of dejected girls waiting to be weighed in the day of the wedding in their dresses
    OurWildKingdomshort+sassy
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