Wedding Woes

Week 7 *sigh*

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Re: Week 7 *sigh*

  • Another quirky thing with this new TX law is, if I were a pregnant woman in TX, I'd be getting ALL UP INTO my doctor's political views on abortion.  Which would normally not be any of my business.  But now TX law is making it my business.

    And where does the lying end?  If I asked my doctor, "If it is discovered that my fetus has a major birth defect, would you mislead or lie to me about that?"  Does he/she have to tell me the truth about their views, so I have the option to find another doctor?

    Or do they push a special button and secret conservative ninjas drop from the ceiling and whisk me to a "maternity farm" where I am forced to stay until giving birth.  Just in case.

    I think this is my business actually.  If you are my OBGYN and refuse to perform abortions, I want to know.  It may not be legal in Michisssippi to lie to me (yet), but that wouldn't necessarily stop a doctor from coercing you.

    I already confirmed my OBGYN works in a secular and Catholic hospital.  If I do become pregnant, I absolutely plan to ask her about how and when she advises patients in D&C situations. I'm 37 and therefore "geriatric" and I want to make sure the doctor I'm trusting my and my potential child's life with is a doctor who will support any decision I make.
    Yep. I haven't talked about this much on these boards, but we had a scare during my pregnancy where we were faced with the possibility of needing to choose. For several weeks, we weren't even sure if he'd survive outside the womb and if he did if it'd be longer than a few days. And if it wasn't a life/death scenario, there was a possibility he would be severely handicapped. I NEVER thought I'd be in that situation. Never. And I did not prepare for it by asking my OB the right questions ahead of time. I ended up feeling super uninformed, quite lost, and turning to google to research options and laws. For the record and thank God, we have a healthy baby boy. 

    Everyone should ask their OB this question. I don't think anyone tries to get pregnant thinking they might be faced with a heart wrenching choice. We certainly didn't. But you (general) have to be prepared and know how you'd navigate the situation.
    This is not how it should be. I am so angry for American women. There should be an immediate option for genetic counselling in any circumstance that there could arise a problem. 
  • levioosa said:
    Thank god your baby is okay and you didn't have to make those decisions @southernbelle0915.  But that scenario is exactly why I want to know in advance.  

    I like to have answers and procedures before things become emotional.  When I tested for the BRCA gene I researched all of my options before my results came back so I knew my decision would be borne of logic and research.

    I have a cousin who has to make a separate appointment to have her tubes tied because she delivered in a Catholic hospital.  She didn't even know her doctor wouldn't do it until after she was pregnant and had to find another one to do the procedure.  No thanks,  you're either on board or you're out.
    I think the fact that religious hospitals have the option to deny treatment is reprehensible.  If you don't want to provide appropriate care to your patients because of personal beliefs, then either pass the case along or don't become a medical professional.  But GTFO of my health care.  I've read of cases where a woman needs a medical abortion to save her life, but because she showed up to a Catholic hospital, they wouldn't do the procedure.  That is unacceptable.  The fact that your doctor could LIE to you about your health care is unacceptable.  The fact that paternalistic bullshit is still extremely present (and increasing) in health care is unacceptable.  What is this fucking bullshit!?

    Yes!  YES!!!  Why?  WHY???  Does "Pro-Life" seem to only ever be for a fetus?  Endanger a woman's life?  Sure, NBD.  But abort a fetus that may not even be viable at that point.  Heaven forbid.  Save it, even at the cost of its mother's life.  I know some people might have different views on "what is life?" and "values of lives".  But, to me, a fully grown adult.  Who is aware of their consciousness.  Who probably has people that depend on her and love her is a substantially more important life than the fetus she carries.  THAT'S the life that needs to be protected.  (In comparison, a wanted fetus is an important life also)

    But then, it's a lot of these Catholic organizations that don't want birth control pills included in their insurance plans, even when there are no plan savings to exclude it.  Which, to be fair, I could better understand...not agree with...but better understand if controlling birth was ALL that those pills do.  Except it isn't.  There are a lot of valid medical reasons to take BC pills, that have nothing to do with BC.  I am infuriated every time I read something like that.  It is just so much ignorance, but ignorance that is affecting a lot of people's lives.

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  • @levioosa thanks for sharing Gisella's story.  It is an important one and needs to be heard.

    The good news we have today is that the so called "Freedom caucus" failed to make any changes to TrumpCare so on the off chance that that helluva bill passes today, you won't have to elect for mammogram coverage or maternity care.

    Fingers crossed we get 21 GOPers to maintain their opposition.

    Also in good news, I asked my State Senator why he hated poor people yesterday after he posted an article supporting Trumpcare and got blocked in return.  Woohoo!
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  • @levioosa thanks for sharing Gisella's story.  It is an important one and needs to be heard.

    The good news we have today is that the so called "Freedom caucus" failed to make any changes to TrumpCare so on the off chance that that helluva bill passes today, you won't have to elect for mammogram coverage or maternity care.

    Fingers crossed we get 21 GOPers to maintain their opposition.

    Also in good news, I asked my State Senator why he hated poor people yesterday after he posted an article supporting Trumpcare and got blocked in return.  Woohoo!

    Aren't politicians supposed to listen to all of their constituents?  Whether they agree with them are not?  Isn't that literally what their job is?

    Apparently not.  I guess I really need to stop living in my fantasy world.

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  • @levioosa thanks for sharing Gisella's story.  It is an important one and needs to be heard.

    The good news we have today is that the so called "Freedom caucus" failed to make any changes to TrumpCare so on the off chance that that helluva bill passes today, you won't have to elect for mammogram coverage or maternity care.

    Fingers crossed we get 21 GOPers to maintain their opposition.

    Also in good news, I asked my State Senator why he hated poor people yesterday after he posted an article supporting Trumpcare and got blocked in return.  Woohoo!

    Aren't politicians supposed to listen to all of their constituents?  Whether they agree with them are not?  Isn't that literally what their job is?

    Apparently not.  I guess I really need to stop living in my fantasy world.

    Well, this is my US Congressman so I'm not batting well in the listening department.

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/powerpost/wp/2017/03/21/hot-mic-catches-gop-congressmans-adviser-planning-spin-about-un-american-protesters/?utm_term=.6e521f340cf4

    Many supporters complained that the people in the room wouldn't listen.  This was a town hall, not a speech!  If you just want to talk at people schedule a damned speech so people know they won't have a chance to talk.  This is also what happens when you ignore requests to host a town hall for two years and schedule one without a second date set in stone. 
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  • @Heffalump, the ED of my local LGBTQ+ center went to our governor's swearing-in/party this year.  She said everyone was perfectly nice and polite to her when they found out what she did for a living.  She also said the thing that got to her was that the people (and realize, this is going to be the elite inner circle of Republicans in my state) were just as shallow and self-centered as she'd always imagined them to be.  She was actually shocked b/c she felt like they were caricatures.  

    When people would ask our organizational mission and she would share it with them, they acted like they have never heard of preventative health care, anti-bullying, and community building issues for the LGBTQ+ community.  She said she didn't think they were acting either.  She said they would just look frightened and concerned and she could tell they had never every thought about the "others" of our communities.  
  • VarunaTT said:
    @Heffalump, the ED of my local LGBTQ+ center went to our governor's swearing-in/party this year.  She said everyone was perfectly nice and polite to her when they found out what she did for a living.  She also said the thing that got to her was that the people (and realize, this is going to be the elite inner circle of Republicans in my state) were just as shallow and self-centered as she'd always imagined them to be.  She was actually shocked b/c she felt like they were caricatures.  

    When people would ask our organizational mission and she would share it with them, they acted like they have never heard of preventative health care, anti-bullying, and community building issues for the LGBTQ+ community.  She said she didn't think they were acting either.  She said they would just look frightened and concerned and she could tell they had never every thought about the "others" of our communities.  
    This is what happens when you'r wealthy and elite and never have to step foot in a home outside of a gated community.
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  • Heffalump said:
    Y'all, I am fighting the schadenfreude, hard.  So I will just say, if you're surprised by this, it's 100% on you.  It's not like we never saw this coming.  Trump wasn't exactly reticent during his campaign.

    Wife Now Regrets Supporting Trump After Husband Set to be Deported

    TL;DR: Woman is vocal Trump supporter, and also married to undocumented immigrant.  He had been allowed to stay in the US, but no mas.  ICE picked him up and sent him to a detention center, where he is set to be deported to Mexico today.

    Helen Beristain told Indiana Public Media she voted for President Trump believing that only “killers” and cartel members would be deported.

    “We don’t want to have cartels here, you don’t want to have drugs in your high schools, you don’t want killers next to you,” she said. “You want to feel safe when you leave your house. I truly believe that. And, this is why I voted for Mr. Trump.”

    “They’re distraught,” [their attorney] said of the family, adding that they did not wish to speak to media on Thursday. “They have lost a husband, a father, a main breadwinner.”

    Helen Beristain indicated to Indiana Public Media that she felt misled by the president’s plans.

    Can I just say, fucking conservatives.  Everyone else is always the problem.  Transgender people are just perverts, mentally ill, or seeking attention...until their own child is transgender.  Undocumented immigrants have no place here...until we decide that we like this one.  There's such a spectacular failure of empathy, and unless something affects them personally, then they don't care.

    I'm really starting to think that's the fundamental difference: empathy, vs. "fuck 'em."

    I honestly don't understand that concept. I can't tell you how many times I've had to explain to people that it's not because I "know" marginalized individuals that I'm passionate about how they are treated. You shouldn't have to think about a sexual assault happening to your mother, wife, or sister to think "man, that's fucked up and wrong." You shouldn't have to know an undocumented immigrant to think that tearing them apart with a deportation would be devastating. You shouldn't have to know someone who is LGBTQ+ who has committed suicide from bullying to think "bullying is a huge problem in this community. What can we do to stop it?" Where is the goddamn humanity?

    And regarding representatives who won't answer their constituents, there's one near me in Laguna Beach who refused to talk to anyone protesting (peacefully). He wouldn't take calls. His staff wouldn't open the door to his office. He wouldn't go to town hall meetings. On Valentine's Day a toddler was there with her mom and she slipped a Valentine under the door. One of the staffers opened the door and smacked the toddler in the face. There were people in the hall, and they were like "woah, hey now," and then the next day the representative made made a statement about his liberal constituents rioting and being un-American. I didn't realize that being a representative of the people just meant surrounding yourself with sycophants and refusing to listen to any (or many) opinions different than your own. Fuck the people, amiright?


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  • And can I also say, in the deportation case above, the husband's application has been pending since 2007?  For everyone who says "I wouldn't have a problem with it if they just followed the law," then fix the damn law.  People who apply to be here legally have their cases pending for 10 years.  That's messed up.
  • levioosa said:
    I honestly don't understand that concept. I can't tell you how many times I've had to explain to people that it's not because I "know" marginalized individuals that I'm passionate about how they are treated. You shouldn't have to think about a sexual assault happening to your mother, wife, or sister to think "man, that's fucked up and wrong." You shouldn't have to know an undocumented immigrant to think that tearing them apart with a deportation would be devastating. You shouldn't have to know someone who is LGBTQ+ who has committed suicide from bullying to think "bullying is a huge problem in this community. What can we do to stop it?" Where is the goddamn humanity?


    I get your point, but this is also why cities tend to vote liberally and rural areas don't.  I went to college an hour and a half outside of Detroit and met people who had never seen a black person in person before.  There are people out there who are so insulated in their conservative, white neighborhoods that they really never think about those people outside of TV shows and news stories.  They should be able to show empathy for people who aren't like them, but their stories are so foreign to their lives that they really almost look at them like fictional characters.
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  • Womp, womp.

    On my WaPo app:

    Breaking News
    Ryan meets with Trump to say he lacks votes to pass health-care [sic] bill; vote now scheduled to begin at about 3:30 p.m.
  • AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

    This motherfucker...

    http://theslot.jezebel.com/oklahoma-state-rep-says-god-brings-beauty-from-the-ashe-1793580974
  • mrsconn23 said:
    AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

    This motherfucker...

    http://theslot.jezebel.com/oklahoma-state-rep-says-god-brings-beauty-from-the-ashe-1793580974
    F*ck this guy. 
  • mrsconn23 said:
    AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

    This motherfucker...

    http://theslot.jezebel.com/oklahoma-state-rep-says-god-brings-beauty-from-the-ashe-1793580974
    Omg.  This fucking fuckface.


    I just love how every male Republican knows exactly what "offends God." I'm also betting if they were brutally raped and some health issue was discovered because of it they wouldn't be calling it "beauty from the ashes."  Has no one fucking heard of separation of church and state?!?


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  • "We just pulled it!"

    Not sure if I should be jumping up and down or more terrified of what's to come!
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  • I can't breathe...laughing.too.hard.  Fuckers.  What a goddamned shitshow...


  • CNN reporting that Trump asked for it to be pulled. So much for his ultimatum?
  • Someone I went to HS with who loves Trump just posted on FB that she is boycotting anything that grows on a vine and is hand picked by "farm workers."

    Bahahaha - enjoy your processed can food that lacks nutrition and is going to give your children diabetes.
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  • Someone I went to HS with who loves Trump just posted on FB that she is boycotting anything that grows on a vine and is hand picked by "farm workers."

    Bahahaha - enjoy your processed can food that lacks nutrition and is going to give your children diabetes.
    But.....but......

    I dont even even know what to say to that. 


    White House tried to block Sally Yates from testifying. Of course. And somehow republican investigators don't see a problem with this? 

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/national-security/trump-administration-sought-to-block-sally-yates-from-testifying-to-congress-on-russia/2017/03/28/82b73e18-13b4-11e7-9e4f-09aa75d3ec57_story.html?tid=sm_fb&utm_term=.0be7f2581e16


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  • Someone I went to HS with who loves Trump just posted on FB that she is boycotting anything that grows on a vine and is hand picked by "farm workers."

    Bahahaha - enjoy your processed can food that lacks nutrition and is going to give your children diabetes.


    I wholeheartedly agree with your first statement.  Hopefully she will start her own large garden to keep her family from developing scurvy.  Or did she literally mean a "vine".  Because many items on a farm do not grow on vines, so I don't really get the point unless she means anything grown on a farm.  I wonder if she realizes that also means no wine?

    But I need to call full stop on your second statement.  You know I think you're awesome and typically super well informed, @kimmiinthemitten, but I have to correct.  As a Type I Diabetic myself, the MYTH and offhand comments that eating too much sugar or too much whatever causes diabetes...especially Type I Diabetes (which is pretty much the only kind children have)...is a huge pet peeve of mine.

    Type I Diabetes is caused by a malfunction in the immune system where a person's own body attacks the beta cells in the pancreas.  Beta cells produce insulin, so no insulin can be produced once they are destroyed.  It is a disease that just happens.  It has nothing to do with what a person eats.  There is nothing that can be done to prevent it.

    Being overweight can be a factor in Type II Diabetes, which is a different disease, despite the similar name (and that annoys the s**t out of me also).  But usually only in people who already have a natural predilection for this condition.  Many people who eat horribly and/or are overweight, because that is not always the same thing, will never develop Type II Diabetes.  And there are also people who are a perfectly healthy weight and/or eat very healthy that will still develop Type II Diabetes. 

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  • Someone I went to HS with who loves Trump just posted on FB that she is boycotting anything that grows on a vine and is hand picked by "farm workers."

    Bahahaha - enjoy your processed can food that lacks nutrition and is going to give your children diabetes.
    I guess she's not drinking anything bottled by Eric Trump's vineyard. 
  • @short+sassy thanks for responding.  My intention was to be tongue in cheek so I'm sorry for being vague and as such perpetuating a dangerous myth.

    My snark was intended to refer to Type II, and that she was creating poor eating habits that could jeopardize her families health in general.  It in no way intended to play down Type I.  


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  • The list of places and things to boycott is growing mighty long for both sides:

    Trump supporters: starbucks, oreos, netflix, budweiser, 84 Lumber, amazon.. Actually there's a convenient list HERE. *shudder*

    Trump haters: anything that sells anything from the Trump's, LendingTree, Hobby Lobby, the UFC.. This group, too, has a convenient list HERE

    But boycotting fruit and vegetables. "My body will be a sanctuary for everything unhealthy! SO THERE!" Um, ok?
    *********************************************************************************

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  • Someone I went to HS with who loves Trump just posted on FB that she is boycotting anything that grows on a vine and is hand picked by "farm workers."

    Bahahaha - enjoy your processed can food that lacks nutrition and is going to give your children diabetes.


    I wholeheartedly agree with your first statement.  Hopefully she will start her own large garden to keep her family from developing scurvy.  Or did she literally mean a "vine".  Because many items on a farm do not grow on vines, so I don't really get the point unless she means anything grown on a farm.  I wonder if she realizes that also means no wine?

    But I need to call full stop on your second statement.  You know I think you're awesome and typically super well informed, @kimmiinthemitten, but I have to correct.  As a Type I Diabetic myself, the MYTH and offhand comments that eating too much sugar or too much whatever causes diabetes...especially Type I Diabetes (which is pretty much the only kind children have)...is a huge pet peeve of mine.

    Type I Diabetes is caused by a malfunction in the immune system where a person's own body attacks the beta cells in the pancreas.  Beta cells produce insulin, so no insulin can be produced once they are destroyed.  It is a disease that just happens.  It has nothing to do with what a person eats.  There is nothing that can be done to prevent it.

    Being overweight can be a factor in Type II Diabetes, which is a different disease, despite the similar name (and that annoys the s**t out of me also).  But usually only in people who already have a natural predilection for this condition.  Many people who eat horribly and/or are overweight, because that is not always the same thing, will never develop Type II Diabetes.  And there are also people who are a perfectly healthy weight and/or eat very healthy that will still develop Type II Diabetes. 

    Actually they are finding occurrences of type II diabetes in people as young as 9 as well as other metabolic disorders which they are attributing to the North American diet. I have several friends who have worked on these studies for prominent universities. 

    As for boycotting things grown on a "vine" que?
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