Grad school advisor retiring, student wanting pictures/messages

Alaska_RockGirl

As I was composing this post in my head I mostly made my decision, but what the hell, I'll run it by you all just to make sure I'm not being terribly rude.

I completed a graduate degree in 2004. One of my co-advisors for that degree is retiring this year. His current student contacted all of his past students via email, including me, asking for pictures or messages to be included in a printed and bound book for his retirement.

I did not keep in touch with this advisor after I gradated. It wasn't a close mentor/mentored relationship. It wasn't awful, it just wasn't anything. He was chair of the department while I was his student and I feel like I fell through the cracks. Of course a bad case of procrastination on my part didn't help much either.

I haven't responded to any of the student's messages yet and I'm leaning towards not responding. I might have pictures on an old hard drive somewhere but I can't remember and I haven't taken the time to dig it out.

Or I think I could send a message of "Best wishes on your next adventure!"

I'm feeling slightly guilty as the student sent a follow up message, which to me suggests people haven't responded.

What would you do?

lnixon8

Don't overthink it. Email the student back with "We weren't really close!" just so they stop bothering you. It's been 13 years, it was paid position, no reason to fake celebrate him if you don't even get a slice of cake out of it.

sparklepants41

I would doubt that the student is truly expecting to get photos/messages from everyone he/she reached out to - especially given that you graduated 13 years ago and haven't kept in touch with your adviser. I would just email back and say something along the lines of:

Thanks for reaching out! I'm not sure I can find any photos from my time spent with Professor Farnsworth Bentley, but I wish you the best of luck in your pursuit - it sounds like a great retirement gift! In the meantime, please feel free to include this message from me in the book: "Best wishes on your next adventure, Professor Bentley! From Alaska Rockgirl, [School/abbreviation] Class of 2004."

ILoveBeachMusic

I agree with @sparklepants41 and her wording of the message is appropriate. I think if you just ignore the request, you are being rude since this student has no idea of your relationship with the professor.

charlotte989875

@sparklepants41 has it right. Keep it simple or just politely decline. This is pretty common in academia to reach out to former students, so if you don't really have anything to say, just decline. 

Alaska_RockGirl

Thanks all! The messages were sitting in my work email inbox, as the student must have googled me to find me, and I needed to deal with it today.

Thanks to @sparklepants41 for the script, I only modified it slightly: "Thanks for reaching out! I'm not sure I can find any digital photos from my time at COLLEGE, but I wish you the best of luck in your pursuit - it sounds like a great retirement gift! In the meantime, please feel free to include this message from me: "Best wishes on your next adventure!""

And now the emails are deleted and I don't feel guilty anymore. Is it Friday yet?

Edited to fix formatting