Bridesmaids matched own dresses to swatch

Knottie1463830101

Good morning ladies!

So when I went dress shopping a year ago, I chose a swatch and let my ladies find a dresss they are comfortable in, and set down a few ground rules.
1.  The color must match
2. Same length.

Everyone did a really good job, 3 bridesmaids bought there's right from the bridal store where we bought the swatch, and 3 did not, but were able to match as close as possible. Ive seen the other 3 dresses and they match almost dead on, should i be worried about different fabrics? Most of them are the same except my one bridesmaid doesn't have tulle on her dress. Since they were all very close in color, almost all perfect matches, is this going to stand out in pictures or look odd?

Thank you! 

southernbelle0915

It sounds like it'll be just fine. 

Don't let yourself worry about stuff like this! Super minor details.

Knottie1463830101

Thank you! That makes me feel so much better. I have read articles online that say its the worst thing I could have done! 

levioosa

Knottie1463830101 said:

Thank you! That makes me feel so much better. I have read articles online that say its the worst thing I could have done! 

I'm willing to bet that those articles were also paid by huge bridal salons that also tell you you have to order everything at the same time for the "dye lots." This is one of those things that the wedding industry says to make you spend more money. 

LondonLisa

'It's a shame I couldn't focus on the bride and groom as The extremely minor variations another adult's dress didn't match down to one micron that it ruined the whole day' -no one, ever. 

PrettyGirlLost

I had 10 BMs wearing 10 different dresses of different fabrics in one of 6 different coordinating colors.  They all looked fabulous and the pictures look fine.

Different fabrics are a non issue.  I personally don't like mismatched hems and think that looks very messy.

Knottie1463830101

I was more worried about the end result of the pictures, as that's something we will have forever, and I was worried about it just not looking right with the fabrics and the colors being slightly different, specially in the sunlight.

Knottie1463830101

Thank you, The hems are all the same length, just the color is almost perfect, but with my one Matron of Honor (I have two) you can tell the color is slightly different. 

Knottie1463830101

LondonLisa said:

'It's a shame I couldn't focus on the bride and groom as The extremely minor variations another adult's dress didn't match down to one micron that it ruined the whole day' -no one, ever. 

I was more worried about the end result of the pictures, as that's something we will have forever, and I was worried about it just not looking right with the fabrics and the colors being slightly different, specially in the sunlight.

redoryx

Knottie1463830101 said:

LondonLisa said:

'It's a shame I couldn't focus on the bride and groom as The extremely minor variations another adult's dress didn't match down to one micron that it ruined the whole day' -no one, ever. 

I was more worried about the end result of the pictures, as that's something we will have forever, and I was worried about it just not looking right with the fabrics and the colors being slightly different, specially in the sunlight.

Do you really think you are going to be celebrating your 50th wedding anniversary, flipping through you photo album and think "It still bums me out that Alison and Jane's dresses are the wrong shade." 

LondonLisa

redoryx said:

Knottie1463830101 said:

LondonLisa said:

'It's a shame I couldn't focus on the bride and groom as The extremely minor variations another adult's dress didn't match down to one micron that it ruined the whole day' -no one, ever. 

I was more worried about the end result of the pictures, as that's something we will have forever, and I was worried about it just not looking right with the fabrics and the colors being slightly different, specially in the sunlight.

Do you really think you are going to be celebrating your 50th wedding anniversary, flipping through you photo album and think "It still bums me out that Alison and Jane's dresses are the wrong shade." 

But those photos are !!

op, wedding planning is stressful, we all get it. But this is one of those times to just not worry about it. It's a non-issue and everyone already has their dresses. Surely you aren't suggesting that they go out and buy another dress. 

Don't waste another second worrying about this. Get a margarita and relax. 

There are several factors that can influence tone and shade, including variations in natural and artificial light (just think of the White/ gold or blue/black THAT dress debate). You can't control this so stop stressing. 

artbyallie

By letting them choose their own dresses (which is a great way to go--I did this also!) you forgo having any further input into what they look like. So relax and don't worry about it. They will all look great because they got to pick what they would feel gorgeous in. Genuine smiles instead of fake make much more difference to pictures than tiny details of dresses.

Knottie1463830101

Thank you! I didn't really think too much into it until my alterations person, who is also making my Matron of honors dress, said that the fabric she is using will look different compared to everyone else. Then it made me think if thats going to look bad for pictures, and then google didn't help. So thank you all! 

levioosa

Why are you having bridesmaids for a vow renewal? 

Knottie1463830101

levioosa said:

Why are you having bridesmaids for a vow renewal? 

Because we had a small intimate wedding with less then 10 people, and have been planning this vow renewal for a year and a half for our families. Again, I'm  not exactly sure why it matters. 

LondonLisa

Knottie1463830101 said:

Thank you! I didn't really think too much into it until my alterations person, who is also making my Matron of honors dress, said that the fabric she is using will look different compared to everyone else. Then it made me think if thats going to look bad for pictures, and then google didn't help. So thank you all! 

Are you kidding me?! You are already married. 

You cant have bridesmaids as you aren't a bride. There is no such thing as a wifesmaid. 

I cant believe you would be so selfish as to demand your friends pay for dresses for your fake wedding. 

Kardashian levels of self-absorption here!

Knottie1463830101

LondonLisa said:

Knottie1463830101 said:

Thank you! I didn't really think too much into it until my alterations person, who is also making my Matron of honors dress, said that the fabric she is using will look different compared to everyone else. Then it made me think if thats going to look bad for pictures, and then google didn't help. So thank you all! 

Are you kidding me?! You are already married. 

You cant have bridesmaids as you aren't a bride. There is no such thing as a wifesmaid. 

I cant believe you would be so selfish as to demand your friends pay for dresses for your fake wedding. 

Kardashian levels of self-absorption here!

Do you just like to troll around on this website because you have nothing better to do? You're the reason no one likes to ask questions in forums. OVER OPINIONATED people who are RUDE. 

levioosa

Knottie1463830101 said:

LondonLisa said:

Knottie1463830101 said:

Thank you! I didn't really think too much into it until my alterations person, who is also making my Matron of honors dress, said that the fabric she is using will look different compared to everyone else. Then it made me think if thats going to look bad for pictures, and then google didn't help. So thank you all! 

Are you kidding me?! You are already married. 

You cant have bridesmaids as you aren't a bride. There is no such thing as a wifesmaid. 

I cant believe you would be so selfish as to demand your friends pay for dresses for your fake wedding. 

Kardashian levels of self-absorption here!

Do you just like to troll around on this website because you have nothing better to do? You're the reason no one likes to ask questions in forums. OVER OPINIONATED people who are RUDE. 

You obviously don't know the meaning of trolling. There's someone rude here, but it isn't LondonLisa. 

Knottie1463830101

levioosa said:

Knottie1463830101 said:

LondonLisa said:

Knottie1463830101 said:

Thank you! I didn't really think too much into it until my alterations person, who is also making my Matron of honors dress, said that the fabric she is using will look different compared to everyone else. Then it made me think if thats going to look bad for pictures, and then google didn't help. So thank you all! 

Are you kidding me?! You are already married. 

You cant have bridesmaids as you aren't a bride. There is no such thing as a wifesmaid. 

I cant believe you would be so selfish as to demand your friends pay for dresses for your fake wedding. 

Kardashian levels of self-absorption here!

Do you just like to troll around on this website because you have nothing better to do? You're the reason no one likes to ask questions in forums. OVER OPINIONATED people who are RUDE. 

You obviously don't know the meaning of trolling. There's someone rude here, but it isn't LondonLisa. 

She is going on to every board I asked a question about, and is saying the same exact thing, and not even answering any of my questions. So yes trolling. 

I'm not here to listen to your opinions about what you think is right and isn't right if you DON'T know the back story as to WHY we did things the way we did them. So if you aren't going to answer my question, go troll some where else. I don't have time for immature women. 

LondonLisa

Knottie1463830101 said:

levioosa said:

Knottie1463830101 said:

LondonLisa said:

Knottie1463830101 said:

Thank you! I didn't really think too much into it until my alterations person, who is also making my Matron of honors dress, said that the fabric she is using will look different compared to everyone else. Then it made me think if thats going to look bad for pictures, and then google didn't help. So thank you all! 

Are you kidding me?! You are already married. 

You cant have bridesmaids as you aren't a bride. There is no such thing as a wifesmaid. 

I cant believe you would be so selfish as to demand your friends pay for dresses for your fake wedding. 

Kardashian levels of self-absorption here!

Do you just like to troll around on this website because you have nothing better to do? You're the reason no one likes to ask questions in forums. OVER OPINIONATED people who are RUDE. 

You obviously don't know the meaning of trolling. There's someone rude here, but it isn't LondonLisa. 

She is going on to every board I asked a question about, and is saying the same exact thing, and not even answering any of my questions. So yes trolling. 

I'm not here to listen to your opinions about what you think is right and isn't right if you DON'T know the back story as to WHY we did things the way we did them. So if you aren't going to answer my question, go troll some where else. I don't have time for immature women. 

This a community. We all visit multiple boards. 

I answered your question then someone raised further information that changed my answer. That isn't trolling. 

As for immature women, there is only one woman on here not just playing dress up for photos, but making her friends do the same! 

The simple answer is, you're already married. It doesn't matter the reasons or choices, that's adulthood. A married woman cannot by definition have bridesmaids. 

Throw a party, no one is saying not to, but it's not a wedding. It's insane to make your friends buy matching dresses for a party! That is self-absorbed. 

Look, I have no steak in your party. But I can guarantee many, many of your guests are thinking the exact same thing we are that will never admit it to your face. 

DrillSergeantCat

Knottie1463830101 said:

She is going on to every board I asked a question about, and is saying the same exact thing, and not even answering any of my questions. So yes trolling. 

I'm not here to listen to your opinions about what you think is right and isn't right if you DON'T know the back story as to WHY we did things the way we did them. So if you aren't going to answer my question, go troll some where else. I don't have time for immature women. 

Here's the thing, though, we've heard all the reasons excuses for having a PPD and it still doesn't matter. You chose to get married the way you chose to get married, own it regardless of the reasoning behind it. You're not a bride, you're a wife and worst of all, you're apparently lying to everyone about your marital status. I'd be beyond pissed, like never speak to you again pissed, if I were in your fake wedding, spent all that money and time on it, only to find out it was all a lie.

levioosa

Knottie1463830101 said:

levioosa said:

Knottie1463830101 said:

LondonLisa said:

Knottie1463830101 said:

Thank you! I didn't really think too much into it until my alterations person, who is also making my Matron of honors dress, said that the fabric she is using will look different compared to everyone else. Then it made me think if thats going to look bad for pictures, and then google didn't help. So thank you all! 

Are you kidding me?! You are already married. 

You cant have bridesmaids as you aren't a bride. There is no such thing as a wifesmaid. 

I cant believe you would be so selfish as to demand your friends pay for dresses for your fake wedding. 

Kardashian levels of self-absorption here!

Do you just like to troll around on this website because you have nothing better to do? You're the reason no one likes to ask questions in forums. OVER OPINIONATED people who are RUDE. 

You obviously don't know the meaning of trolling. There's someone rude here, but it isn't LondonLisa. 

She is going on to every board I asked a question about, and is saying the same exact thing, and not even answering any of my questions. So yes trolling. 

I'm not here to listen to your opinions about what you think is right and isn't right if you DON'T know the back story as to WHY we did things the way we did them. So if you aren't going to answer my question, go troll some where else. I don't have time for immature women. 

So you did it for insurance? For the pretty pictures? It doesn't really matter. The fact is you made a CHOICE to get married in a DW wedding, and now you want to have the big party too. What you are doing is rude.  It is immature to think you deserve a big party and gifts.  

Oh, and we all visit multiple boards. You're not that special.  

DrillSergeantCat

You should totes fire your MOH! She's probably not doing all her other duties like planning your bachelorette party, bridal shower, bridal tea, personal shower, couples shower, wedding shower, blowing smoke up your ass, slaving in an appropriate manner, morning-after brunch, and send off lunch either! She's totes going to ruin your wedding with her different colored fabric. I mean, how dare she do exactly what you told her she could do. How inconsiderate!

MissKittyDanger

Knottie1463830101 said:

She is going on to every board I asked a question about, and is saying the same exact thing, and not even answering any of my questions. So yes trolling. 

I'm not here to listen to your opinions about what you think is right and isn't right if you DON'T know the back story as to WHY we did things the way we did them. So if you aren't going to answer my question, go troll some where else. I don't have time for immature women. 

You should have watched the boards before posting. You would have known this is what would happen.

We don't have time for liars on these boards.

Also don't post the same damn thing on multiple boards! You're wasting time. Everyone one TK hates pretty princess days PPD - when you're married but have a wedding.


You chose to get married. Your wedding party isn't choosing to be lied to.

PrettyGirlLost

Knottie1463830101 said:

LondonLisa said:

Knottie1463830101 said:

Thank you! I didn't really think too much into it until my alterations person, who is also making my Matron of honors dress, said that the fabric she is using will look different compared to everyone else. Then it made me think if thats going to look bad for pictures, and then google didn't help. So thank you all! 

Are you kidding me?! You are already married. 

You cant have bridesmaids as you aren't a bride. There is no such thing as a wifesmaid. 

I cant believe you would be so selfish as to demand your friends pay for dresses for your fake wedding. 

Kardashian levels of self-absorption here!

Do you just like to troll around on this website because you have nothing better to do? You're the reason no one likes to ask questions in forums. OVER OPINIONATED people who are RUDE. 

Yep, you bet your sweet ass I like to troll people online who are acting like superficial entitled brats.

No, I don't have anything better to do while I'm commuting.

Do your friends know they are wasting money on dresses?  The colors and fabrics are grossly irrelevant at this point.

What I don't get is why you need to LIE to anyone?  If everyone loves you as much as you claim and will just want to support you, and if your reasons for getting married without them really are as valid as you claim they are, then why not just tell everyone you are already married?  Why LIE and pretend you're not?

I've been to 2 PPDs and I knew they were PPDs.  No biggie.  If I ever find out any of the weddings I have been to over the years were actually PPDs I will be livid- especially over the OOT ones where I had to spend considerable money and personal time to attend.

artbyallie

Please pay back these women for the dresses they bought. It is extremely inappropriate for you to ask them to buy them for a play you're putting on. You need to provide the wardrobe since you're the producer.

MyNameIsNot

You are honestly ok with lying to your friends about being married so that they will dress up and pretend to be bridesmaids? 

This is flat out disgusting. And no, it's not a matter of opinion. It is a fact that you are married. It is a fact that you are lying to your family and friends about being married. It is a fact that lying about this is flat out wrong. 

I'm quite sure that you're made up, because you are so perfectly devoid of any morals or responsibility. But sadly, it is true that there are people who are selfish enough to behave this way. 

CMGragain

The Knot is a site that is designed to help brides plan their weddings.  You are not a bride.
If you want to post about your vow renewal, then you are welcome to use that board.  Otherwise, you don't belong here.  We are tired of your games.

redoryx

I'm relatively PPD-lite in that as long as people know in advance and can make their own informed decision to attend or not, I give it a side eye but whatever. 

But making your friends buy dresses and go through all the annoying rituals of being a bridesmaid when you're already married?? I don't give a fuck if they all know, that's tacky AF, I'd decline your request to be a BM, and I'd be dropping you as a friend.

And if I didn't know in advance and then found out later that you made me buy a dress and go through all the annoying rituals when you were already married, I'd not only drop you as a friend, I'd demand you pay me back for my dress.

Also, OP, just to be clear: this is not me being rude. This is me being blunt and honest. Just so there's no confusion. 

sparklepants41

And OP, what do you do when your MOH and/or one of your bridesmaids wants to sign your marriage license after the "ceremony" as a witness? Do you tell her then that you were lying to her, or do you keep up the charade?