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Hiding Bridesmaids Tattoos

I am not against tattoos, I have a few myself. BUT, my sister has a full sleeve that I do not want my guests to see- poop emoji, zombie cupcake, skulls... Plus, my family does not approve of her tattoos. She has said she is fine not being in my wedding because of them, but that isn't an option for me.

My wedding is in the summer (2018), so I would like for my bridesmaids to wear short dresses. In order for my sister's tattoos to be covered, she will need long sleeves (or at least a long sleeve for the left arm). I've looked online at different websites but haven't found anything. Do any of you bride-to-bes have suggestions?? I thought about finding dresses and having sleeves added, but I don't know if that is possible with some dresses.

EDIT: My sister has absolutely no problem covering up her tattoos. She covers them at every family gathering, even when it's  hot, because she knows my grandparents and mom don't like tattoos. Her comment about not being in the wedding was to appease my family members who do not like tattoos. Either way, she is wearing long sleeves at my wedding as she has already made that decision to avoid negative comments from my grandparents and family.
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Re: Hiding Bridesmaids Tattoos

  • I have 4 and my sister is my MOH, so I was thinking of a different dress for her anyway. 


  • I am not against tattoos, I have a few myself. BUT, my sister has a full sleeve that I do not want my guests to see- poop emoji, zombie cupcake, skulls... Plus, my family does not approve of her tattoos. She has said she is fine not being in my wedding because of them, but that isn't an option for me.

    My wedding is in the summer (2018), so I would like for my bridesmaids to wear short dresses. In order for my sister's tattoos to be covered, she will need long sleeves (or at least a long sleeve for the left arm). I've looked online at different websites but haven't found anything. Do any of you bride-to-bes have suggestions?? I thought about finding dresses and having sleeves added, but I don't know if that is possible with some dresses.


    How does your sister feel about long sleeves/covering? You really should be checking with her regarding what she's wearing. There are many bolero/shrugs/pashmina options depending on the style dress you choose.

     If you don't want your guests to see her art (which sounds super judgy by the way) then take her up on her offer not to stand up.  But really her tattoos are a part of her and you're asking her to be in your wedding, tattoos and all, don't try and make her change who she is because someone might not like her tattoos. 
    DrillSergeantCatlevioosasparklepants41
  • You said her not being in your bridal party is not an option for you but maybe hiding who she is isn't an option for her. Have you talked to her about her feelings on the situation? It would really hurt my feelings if my sister said she wanted me there but I had to cover up because my body was too tattooed/ fat/ skinny/ dark/ pale/ veiny whatever. If I had to hide who I was because it didn't fit someone else vision I would feel extremely hurt.
    Heffalumpsparklepants41InLoveInQueens
  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Will she be forced to wear her cover up during the reception as well? 

    If she declines your offer to cover up as a BM, what happens if she chooses to wear a sleeveless dress as your guest?   Will you take her off the guest list?

    Either way, the sensibilities of your family will be tested.  Keep her as a BM, dressed exactly as you would any other BM, and maintain your own common sense. 
    InLoveInQueens
  • Your sister said she doesn't want to be in your wedding..."that's not an option" for you is the wrong attitude. Why not ask her to do a reading or something? Where she won't have to wear a BM dress.

    But if you do force her to stand up in your wedding (extreme eye roll), you should pick a dress for ALL BMs that covers their sleeves if that's what you want. It's super insulting to be like "you HAVE to stand up in my wedding but I hate how you look, so cover up". 

    Stop judging and focus your energy somewhere else. Seriously.
    *********************************************************************************

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    charlotte989875levioosaredoryxInLoveInQueens
  • debbeaudebbeau member
    Knottie Warrior 500 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    How does your sister feel about covering her tats up? Is she "no problem. ok don't want to upset grandma" or "this is who I am and I am proud of it"?

    2 of my bridesmaids had several tattoos. The thought of asking them to cover them up never even entered my mind.
    charlotte989875InLoveInQueens
  • DrillSergeantCatDrillSergeantCat Oklahoma City, OK member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer

    Heffalump said:


    I'm going to be honest: I just don't think your attitude is appropriate, OP. 

    1. Seeing a poop emoji or skull tattoo is not going to traumatize your guests.  (Zombie cupcake legit made me snort-laugh.)  It's not your job to go around curating real life so that your guests don't--heaven forfend!--see a tattoo on someone else. 

    2.  It makes no nevermind whether your family approves or not.  It's your sister's body, and it's not up for communal input or control.

    3.  It's hard to tell from your wording whether she wants to be a bridesmaid but is willing to skip it in order to avoid drama, or whether she's indifferent to it at best.  It was your decision whether to ask her or not, and now that you did, it's her decision whether she wants to participate. 

    4.  Don't make your sister wear a different dress just because you don't like her tattoos.  Singling her out is not the solution.  Loving her as-is and not trying to control her appearance is.

    I would be careful here, before you hurt your relationship with your sister.


    But the PICTURES!!!
    InLoveInQueens
  • DrillSergeantCatDrillSergeantCat Oklahoma City, OK member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    Instead of trying to hide your sister's tattoos, why don't you get tattoo sleeves for all your BMs! 
    ahoyweddinglnixon8InLoveInQueens
  • climbingwifeclimbingwife NYC 'burbs member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Obviously your sister is not OK with covering up her tattoos. She's told you she'd rather not be in your wedding. What are you going to do - force her into a dress with sleeves, in the summer, no less! How incredibly rude of you. 

    You have two options - let your sister wear what SHE wants. Don't force her to cover up her tattoos. They are a part of her body. It doesn't matter if your parents don't like them, or other members of your family. Who gives a shit? 

    Don't have her stand up in your wedding. Let her just be a guest. 

    levioosaDrillSergeantCatcharlotte989875InLoveInQueens
  • Have you asked your sister what she wants to do? If you think she may not tell you she doesn't want to be in the wedding (in an effort to spare your feelings, etc), is there another family member she may be honest with? Maybe your mom or another sibling. In order to maintain your relationship with your sister, letting her choose what she's comfortable with may be best. You can always take special pictures with her if you want, or she could do a reading or play another role in the ceremony (not handing out programs or something that could be done by an inanimate object). 

    Also, has anyone in the family made comments to your sister about her tattoos? Part of me also feels like if someone has a sleeve they're kind of past the point of caring what others think so it may not bother her as much as it bothers you.

    Or, like @DrillSergeantCat suggested, get all the BMs fake sleeve tattoos! (Only half serious, but would be hilarious!)
  • Hi ahoywedding. My mom and I both talked to my sister and she has absolutely no problem covering up her tattoos. She covers then up at every family gathering, even when it's 100 degrees. She does it put of respect for those that don't like tattoos and to avoid family drama. My grandparents think any tattoo is ugly, regardless.
  • climbingwifeclimbingwife NYC 'burbs member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers


    Hi ahoywedding. My mom and I both talked to my sister and she has absolutely no problem covering up her tattoos. She covers then up at every family gathering, even when it's 100 degrees. She does it put of respect for those that don't like tattoos and to avoid family drama. My grandparents think any tattoo is ugly, regardless.


    So you'll be covering up your own tattoos? 

    InLoveInQueens
  • Yes climbingwife. All of mine will be covered
  • LondonLisaLondonLisa London, UK member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers


    Hi ahoywedding. My mom and I both talked to my sister and she has absolutely no problem covering up her tattoos. She covers then up at every family gathering, even when it's 100 degrees. She does it put of respect for those that don't like tattoos and to avoid family drama. My grandparents think any tattoo is ugly, regardless.


    Then why not let her decide what she wants to wear.  This is where you need to let go of your matchy-matchy vision and let all the BMs choose what makes them comfortable.  Just pick a colour and let all BMs know that they can also wear a wrap/cardigan if they prefer. 
    InLoveInQueens
  • I can understand where you're coming from, Knottie#s. In her 40s, my mom covered up an ankle tattoo from her dad for years in order to avoid drama. Even now, more than a decade after he first found out about it, he still has something to say every time he sees it. 

    Would a sheer sleeve work? That might cover up enough while still leaving your ladies cool enough for a summer wedding. Something like this:

    http://m.shop.nordstrom.com/s/4583884?pathAlias=1-state-chiffon-fit-flare-dress
    Knottiece16ab8fd6bdfe76
  • LondonLisa, I actually prefer to let my bridemaids pick their own dresses, but wanted opinions on sleeves for my sister. Absolutely none of the places I have looked have sleeves with shorter dresses. My sister is my MOH and was going to have a different dress regardless 
  • JediElizabeth, sheer would definitely work! They don't have to be completely covered up, just not the center of attention so that my family members point it out and ask questions. She is ultimately going to pick out what she is wearing, I just want to see different options and have ideas. Thank you!
    JediElizabeth


  • I can understand where you're coming from, Knottie#s. In her 40s, my mom covered up an ankle tattoo from her dad for years in order to avoid drama. Even now, more than a decade after he first found out about it, he still has something to say every time he sees it. 

    Would a sheer sleeve work? That might cover up enough while still leaving your ladies cool enough for a summer wedding. Something like this:

    http://m.shop.nordstrom.com/s/4583884?pathAlias=1-state-chiffon-fit-flare-dress


    That's gorgeous! Something with lace would also work, if you're just trying to make them less visible. There are a lot of cute summer dresses with lace sleeves. Do her tattoos taper off towards her wrist? She may be able to get away with a 3/4 length sleeve and some chunky jewelry. (A lot of my coworkers have wrist tattoos and have a healthy supply of jewelry to cover them up at work).

    She also could use some kind of wrap during the ceremony, and then discard during the reception, if that wouldn't give grandma a heart attack ;) 
    SP29
  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers


    JediElizabeth, sheer would definitely work! They don't have to be completely covered up, just not the center of attention so that my family members point it out and ask questions. She is ultimately going to pick out what she is wearing, I just want to see different options and have ideas. Thank you!


    Perhaps by not covering her tattoos, she would get questions.  Asking questions is not a bad thing.  It is often the reason someone transitions from ignorance to acceptance, or at least tolerance.
    ahoywedding
  • Ahoywedding I was thinking sheer or lace as well! her sleeve goes from shoulder to wrist, so I don't know about 3/4 sleeve. She usually wears full length sleeves at family functions.

    I saw some custom dresses that have detachable sleeves that were made afterwards... I was thinking that or a wrap would be good too so she isn't stuck with less options. Sh can find a short sleeve/strapless dress she likes and maybe go from there?
  • What about a lace bolero?  My cousin wore one with her strapless dress because she's self conscious about her arms.  Then your sister could take it off if/when she wanted.
    SP29Knottiece16ab8fd6bdfe76ahoywedding
  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    edited May 2017
    I can sympathize with OP.  I strongly dislike tattoos, personally.  I would never say anything to someone who had one because that would be rude.
    I judge people who have offensive tattoos.  We have tattoo parlors here that openly refuse to do them.  There is nothing cute about a pile of poop.  Swastikas are also taboo.  Many shops will not do the Confederate Battle Flag, either, or anything that suggests racism or bigotry.  As a person who is fighting death, any designs that glorify it, such as skulls or zombies, are offensive to me, though you can easily get them from any tattoo parlor.
    If you choose to decorate your body with tattoos, that is your own business, but demanding that everyone approves of your choice is going too far.  Don't come and show me your latest body art and expect me to coo over it, because I won't.
    As for the bridesmaid, it sounds like she is a nice and reasonable person who has made some errors in judgement.  I hope she finds something nice to wear at the wedding.

    I have a friend who is in the business of tattoo removal.  She always has more work than she can easily schedule.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
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