Wedding Recap and Withdrawal

Post Wedding Blues

After all my wedding planning, my wedding didn't go exactly as planned and I feel as though I let my guests down. Although, two of my close friends said the ceremony was beautiful and the reception entertaining; I almost feel as though the guests were cheated. My ceremony started late due to two of my bridesmaids showing up late for hair and makeup. Then the officiant kinda rushed through the ceremony because he had to officiate another elsewhere (wish I knew this prior to). I have no idea what time the reception began (I left my phone in the room) but it felt really long and some guests left before it ended. I know people don't come to a wedding expecting to be "pleased" but I am just saddened by the thought they may not have enjoyed themselves. 

Re: Post Wedding Blues



  • After all my wedding planning, my wedding didn't go exactly as planned and I feel as though I let my guests down. Although, two of my close friends said the ceremony was beautiful and the reception entertaining; I almost feel as though the guests were cheated. My ceremony started late due to two of my bridesmaids showing up late for hair and makeup. Then the officiant kinda rushed through the ceremony because he had to officiate another elsewhere (wish I knew this prior to). I have no idea what time the reception began (I left my phone in the room) but it felt really long and some guests left before it ended. I know people don't come to a wedding expecting to be "pleased" but I am just saddened by the thought they may not have enjoyed themselves. 


    Did you and your spouse have a good time? You say it felt "long", but maybe we're you just tired? Weddings are really long days. As long as you hosted everyone well (food, drinks, places to sit) you're fine. And there are always people who leave early in my opinion. 

    How late did the ceremony start?
  • I would not read too much into people leaving before the reception was over. In my experience, there are always a decent number of guests who do not stay until the very end, and there can be any number of reasons why - they're tired, they have a long drive home, they need to be someplace early the next morning, etc. You shouldn't automatically take it as a sign that they were having a bad time.  As long as you hosted everyone properly, you did your job and need to stop beating yourself up. 

    I won't pretend like it isn't disheartening when an event you spent so much time planning doesn't go quite like you expected, and I'm truly sorry you're going through that right now. It's okay to feel a bit bummed about it for a while, but don't let it ruin or take focus away from the really great thing going on right now - a new marriage and an exciting new chapter in your life. 
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  • We did. He more so than I. Yes everyone was well fed and seated. I say it felt long because people left before it was time to dance. The ceremony started about 45 minutes - hour late.
  • You are so right. I am trying to put it to bed in my head but I do have a habit of dwelling on things. Maybe going back to work tomorrow and doing my thank you cards will get my mind off it.  


  • We did. He more so than I. Yes everyone was well fed and seated. I say it felt long because people left before it was time to dance. The ceremony started about 45 minutes - hour late.


    Did a lot of people leave early? Even with a start that late I'd be surprised (unless your wedding was a really late ceremony or on a weeknight) that many people left that early. Were there long toasts or anything?

    People are weird sometimes. Do you have any sneak peak shots from your photographer or from friends and family? Hopefully those will remind you of all the fun. 


  • You are so right. I am trying to put it to bed in my head but I do have a habit of dwelling on things. Maybe going back to work tomorrow and doing my thank you cards will get my mind off it.  


    Yes, try to move your mind to other things, like ... now you're married! Yay! What other fun stuff do are you both thinking of planning for your future together? 

    For the benefit of lurkers, I will point this out- if your bridesmaids were so late that your ceremony ended up starting about 45 minutes late... not cool. Those ladies should have done their own makeup and simple hairstyles to get the group out on time. I was a BM once when the two hired stylists/MUA were taking so long on other ladies that three of us just did our own makeup to move things along. 
    You can't go back and fix that OP and it's not at all worth dwelling on. People always leave weddings early no matter how well they're hosted, and people know ceremonies start late for any variety of reasons. It sounds like you hosted well so try to focus on being married! 
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  • Our minister and her husband left right after dinner.  I would imagine she had work to do to prepare for church on Sunday.  Don't take it personally that people didn't stay with you all night--they were there for the most important part, the wedding!  Sit down with your husband and talk about all the things that you both enjoyed about the night, like your vows, the food, dancing, any special songs, people you hadn't seen in years, etc.  If the only thing that went wrong was your ceremony starting late and being rushed, you avoided more disaster than many brides out there!  Remember: There is no such thing as the perfect wedding.
  • If I end up pregnant by early next year, I'm thinking of having a "reception" style event and revealing my pregnancy for our one year anniversary. A girl can get creative or crazy (whichever way you look at it). I am really happy that I'm married to this amazing guy and I can't stop smiling every time I look at my ring. It's the little things that matter, I just lost focus for a bit. 
  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited June 2017




    If I end up pregnant by early next year, I'm thinking of having a "reception" style event and revealing my pregnancy for our one year anniversary. A girl can get creative or crazy (whichever way you look at it). I am really happy that I'm married to this amazing guy and I can't stop smiling every time I look at my ring. It's the little things that matter, I just lost focus for a bit. 




    A reception style event?  What do you have in mind?  There is nothing wrong with an anniversary party, but if you are trying to redo your reception that didn't go as well as you had hoped, I would think twice.
    Personally, I'm not into public announcements of a pregnancy.  A lot can happen in nine months, and you might regret making a big deal about this if things don't go as you are hoping.
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