• Images
  • Text
  • Find a Couple + Registry
GO
Destination Weddings

PSA: Thinking of getting married before your DW?

13»

Re: PSA: Thinking of getting married before your DW?

  • @coop4321 - Ok no....you do not need to establish residency (if you're both from the U.S.), your ceremony does not need to be in Spanish, and you do not need to return 30 days later to get your paperwork - you can get it the same day or a couple days later. I don't know who/where your information is coming from, but it's incorrect. It's not that hard to get married there. 

    You have vision blinders on. You want a swanky beach wedding in Mexico, but you don't want to put in the work, so you're willing to literally lie to the most important people in your life to make it happen. WAKE UP. Have some integrity. Either get married in Mexico or don't, but don't lie to your family and friends. Oh and also, not telling people is lying by omission. 
    Oh, I'm guessing that information is coming from the same travel agent telling them not to tell anyone they are getting married in the States.
    image
    SP29
  • I really don't understand why people think it is so difficult to make a marriage legal in Mexico. So, there are two things- being there ~3 days before the ceremony and the blood test. Many resorts will act as a middle man for the paperwork to reduce the time frame you need to be in country and even do onsite blood tests.

    However, one thing specifically gets me - the 3 day in-country requirement. Most couples I know took around that same amount of time off before their local weddings for preparations/last minute issues. I'm pretty sure blood tests and paperwork would fall into that preparation category. Also, if guests are traveling overseas for the wedding, they are most likely taking 2-3 days off prior to the ceremony to be there to witness it (a day of traveling, a day of buffer in case of a delayed flight). So, if your guests have to do it, you can too!

    I personally did not get married the day I stepped foot in Australia. We did not have a residency requirement because of the paperwork done up front (amazing what can be coordinated from afar), but I wanted that time to beat jet lag, relax, and have time to sort out any last minute details (meeting my photographer for the first time, meeting the wedding coordinator for the first time, etc). I really liked having that time to just enjoy my H before he really became my H!!
    My sister's resort even told them to be there 3 days ahead of time for the PPD ceremony! There would have been pleeeeeeeeenty of time in those 3 days for blood tests, paperwork, etc. And yeah, any couple traveling for their wedding would probably get to the area at least a couple days ahead of time anyway. Hell, I took off 2 days before our wedding and it was 20 minutes away.
    SP29
  • When I was a bride, blood tests were required in most states in the USA.  Why the problem?  Mexican marriage law varies by the location.  Resorts are expert at getting you through the paperwork.  There is no excuse to have a fake wedding.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
    DrillSergeantCatInLoveInQueensOurWildKingdomSP29
  • This would definitely hurt, but I think I'd still be there during the wedding to support. Still...
  • My Fiance and I are getting married in Mexico in 2020 and have looked into making it legal at the ceremony.  However, is costs a lot more you have to go down 4 days before.  You have to have blood work done, a chest scan, and your birth certificate translated to Spanish.  We ended up deciding we will go to the court house with just our immediate family a day before heading to Mexico.  But we are NOT telling anyone else invited to the wedding, because we don't want any hurt feelings.  Your sister should have told you so you could be there and definitely not posted about it, because a lot of people will think, why am I paying and flying someplace to see you get married, when you're already married?!
  • Well what's the right way to do it then? There will be conflict either way.
  • levioosa said:
    My Fiance and I are getting married in Mexico in 2020 and have looked into making it legal at the ceremony.  However, is costs a lot more you have to go down 4 days before.  You have to have blood work done, a chest scan, and your birth certificate translated to Spanish.  We ended up deciding we will go to the court house with just our immediate family a day before heading to Mexico.  But we are NOT telling anyone else invited to the wedding, because we don't want any hurt feelings.  Your sister should have told you so you could be there and definitely not posted about it, because a lot of people will think, why am I paying and flying someplace to see you get married, when you're already married?!
    Except you’re doing the same exact thing. 
    Well what's the right way to do it then? There will be conflict either way.
  • flantasticflantastic The Midwest member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    levioosa said:
    My Fiance and I are getting married in Mexico in 2020 and have looked into making it legal at the ceremony.  However, is costs a lot more you have to go down 4 days before.  You have to have blood work done, a chest scan, and your birth certificate translated to Spanish.  We ended up deciding we will go to the court house with just our immediate family a day before heading to Mexico.  But we are NOT telling anyone else invited to the wedding, because we don't want any hurt feelings.  Your sister should have told you so you could be there and definitely not posted about it, because a lot of people will think, why am I paying and flying someplace to see you get married, when you're already married?!
    Except you’re doing the same exact thing. 
    Well what's the right way to do it then? There will be conflict either way.
    Don't get married in Mexico. That is the right way to do it.

    (That is, unless you're prepared to do the 4 days, blood work, chest scan, etc. and you are inviting people to a legal marriage in Mexico. Because the actual, legal marriage is what they care about, as you yourself recognized with the bolded.)

    Anniversary

    levioosaahoyweddingInLoveInQueensernursej
  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs member
    Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    levioosa said:
    My Fiance and I are getting married in Mexico in 2020 and have looked into making it legal at the ceremony.  However, is costs a lot more you have to go down 4 days before.  You have to have blood work done, a chest scan, and your birth certificate translated to Spanish.  We ended up deciding we will go to the court house with just our immediate family a day before heading to Mexico.  But we are NOT telling anyone else invited to the wedding, because we don't want any hurt feelings.  Your sister should have told you so you could be there and definitely not posted about it, because a lot of people will think, why am I paying and flying someplace to see you get married, when you're already married?!
    Except you’re doing the same exact thing. 
    Well what's the right way to do it then? There will be conflict either way.
    Is this a trick question?

    The right, and ONLY way to marry is in ONE legally binding ceremony in which all guests are aware that it is THE ONLY legal ceremony.  The right way to marry is legally and honestly.  There is ZERO conflict and 100% common sense and decency.

    Why, for the love of all things holy, would ANYONE want to deliberately LIE to their nearest and dearest? 

    If you want to MARRY in another country, then fulfill the requirements.  If you want to play or vacation in another country, then honeymoon there. You cannot and should not try to have it both ways.  It is impossible.
    ahoyweddingshort+sassyInLoveInQueensernursej
  • climbingwifeclimbingwife NYC 'burbs member
    10000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited October 16
    My Fiance and I are getting married in Mexico in 2020 and have looked into making it legal at the ceremony.  However, is costs a lot more you have to go down 4 days before.  You have to have blood work done, a chest scan, and your birth certificate translated to Spanish.  We ended up deciding we will go to the court house with just our immediate family a day before heading to Mexico.  But we are NOT telling anyone else invited to the wedding, because we don't want any hurt feelings.  Your sister should have told you so you could be there and definitely not posted about it, because a lot of people will think, why am I paying and flying someplace to see you get married, when you're already married?!
    Do not lie to your guests! This is a terrible idea! 

    short+sassyInLoveInQueensernursej
  • ahoyweddingahoywedding member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    edited October 16
    My Fiance and I are getting married in Mexico in 2020 and have looked into making it legal at the ceremony.  However, is costs a lot more you have to go down 4 days before.  You have to have blood work done, a chest scan, and your birth certificate translated to Spanish.  We ended up deciding we will go to the court house with just our immediate family a day before heading to Mexico.  But we are NOT telling anyone else invited to the wedding, because we don't want any hurt feelings.  Your sister should have told you so you could be there and definitely not posted about it, because a lot of people will think, why am I paying and flying someplace to see you get married, when you're already married?!
    They're going to find out. Maybe not before your wedding, maybe not while you're all in Mexico, but the truth will eventually come out. Do you trust your immediate family to not let anything slip? They may not say anything on purpose, but it could be let out on accident. My sister wasn't planning on her friend running into our parents, but that happened. Won't your family thing it's weird when you tell them they can't mention anything about you legal ceremony ever?

    Your immediate family may not say anything to you, but I almost guarantee that at least one person is wishing they didn't have to pay a bunch of money out of pocket to go to Mexico for your wedding reenactment. 

    Also, this post is super old. If you want to continue the conversation, it's best to start a new thread.
    short+sassyInLoveInQueens
  • ShesSoColdShesSoCold bend over and I'll show ya mod
    Moderator 5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its
    My Fiance and I are getting married in Mexico in 2020 and have looked into making it legal at the ceremony.  However, is costs a lot more you have to go down 4 days before.  You have to have blood work done, a chest scan, and your birth certificate translated to Spanish.  We ended up deciding we will go to the court house with just our immediate family a day before heading to Mexico.  But we are NOT telling anyone else invited to the wedding, because we don't want any hurt feelings.  Your sister should have told you so you could be there and definitely not posted about it, because a lot of people will think, why am I paying and flying someplace to see you get married, when you're already married?!
    Yeah I;m with Levioosa here - how is what you're planning any different than this?
    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
  • WinstonsGirlWinstonsGirl The Cold North member
    Tenth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    My Fiance and I are getting married in Mexico in 2020 and have looked into making it legal at the ceremony.  However, is costs a lot more you have to go down 4 days before.  You have to have blood work done, a chest scan, and your birth certificate translated to Spanish.  We ended up deciding we will go to the court house with just our immediate family a day before heading to Mexico.  But we are NOT telling anyone else invited to the wedding, because we don't want any hurt feelings.  Your sister should have told you so you could be there and definitely not posted about it, because a lot of people will think, why am I paying and flying someplace to see you get married, when you're already married?!
    No one ever answers me, but I don't get this.  Are you only going to Mexico for 2 days?  A long weekend?  We got married in Hawaii.  Flew in Thursday, got married Monday, flew home later that week.  Mexico is a 1 week trip for us.  Why not fly down, get married day 4 (or 5 for the paperwork and stuff) and enjoy the last few days to finish a week.  Do people seriously fly somewhere like Mexico for a long weekend??  
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    InLoveInQueens
  • LondonLisaLondonLisa London, UK member
    2500 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Firstly, you mentioned like 4 things that really don't sound impossible. Just a bit of a faff over a couple days. But no one forced you to get married in Mexico. You CHOSE this. This faff is on you. 

    But no matter what you do, you are not getting married in Mexico. You are getting married in the courthouse and then lying to your friends and making them pay thousands to come to your honeymoon. And then doing a play-pretend reenactment. 

    The truth will always come out. Maybe not before the wedding, but at some point your mum is going to slip and mention your real wedding. And people will be hurt, angry, and reevaluate their friendships with you. It has happened over and over again on here. Lying to your family to make them spend money is a shitty thing to do. And it will follow you for life. 

    You are lying to your nearest and dearest to get them to spend thousands of dollars, for a party that you want (not something you need). You don't NEED to get married in Mexico. You CHOSE this.  Say that out loud and own it because nothing is being forced on you. Because it is not important that these people are there to see you get married, otherwise they would be at the courthouse with you. And you are lying to them.

    So what is the right way to do it? Stop lying and actually get married in Mexico, or cancel and have a courthouse wedding, then honeymoon in Mexico. And start profusely apologising for lying to everyone. 


    InLoveInQueens
  • My Fiance and I are getting married in Mexico in 2020 and have looked into making it legal at the ceremony.  However, is costs a lot more you have to go down 4 days before.  You have to have blood work done, a chest scan, and your birth certificate translated to Spanish.  We ended up deciding we will go to the court house with just our immediate family a day before heading to Mexico.  But we are NOT telling anyone else invited to the wedding, because we don't want any hurt feelings.  Your sister should have told you so you could be there and definitely not posted about it, because a lot of people will think, why am I paying and flying someplace to see you get married, when you're already married?!
    No one ever answers me, but I don't get this.  Are you only going to Mexico for 2 days?  A long weekend?  We got married in Hawaii.  Flew in Thursday, got married Monday, flew home later that week.  Mexico is a 1 week trip for us.  Why not fly down, get married day 4 (or 5 for the paperwork and stuff) and enjoy the last few days to finish a week.  Do people seriously fly somewhere like Mexico for a long weekend??  

    We do … but for a regular vacation. Headed down for 3 days at New Year's this year. Doesn't excuse this poster's rudeness.
    MesmrEwe
  • WinstonsGirlWinstonsGirl The Cold North member
    Tenth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    ernursej said:
    My Fiance and I are getting married in Mexico in 2020 and have looked into making it legal at the ceremony.  However, is costs a lot more you have to go down 4 days before.  You have to have blood work done, a chest scan, and your birth certificate translated to Spanish.  We ended up deciding we will go to the court house with just our immediate family a day before heading to Mexico.  But we are NOT telling anyone else invited to the wedding, because we don't want any hurt feelings.  Your sister should have told you so you could be there and definitely not posted about it, because a lot of people will think, why am I paying and flying someplace to see you get married, when you're already married?!
    No one ever answers me, but I don't get this.  Are you only going to Mexico for 2 days?  A long weekend?  We got married in Hawaii.  Flew in Thursday, got married Monday, flew home later that week.  Mexico is a 1 week trip for us.  Why not fly down, get married day 4 (or 5 for the paperwork and stuff) and enjoy the last few days to finish a week.  Do people seriously fly somewhere like Mexico for a long weekend??  

    We do … but for a regular vacation. Headed down for 3 days at New Year's this year. Doesn't excuse this poster's rudeness.
    And you’re just as far as us.  I can’t imaging flying that far for 3 days. Vancouver yes, not Mexico
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    ernursej
13»
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards