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Etiquette. . . we don't need no stinking etiquette

kaos16kaos16 member
Knottie Warrior 500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Answer
in Wedding Etiquette Forum

It looks like today is shaping up to be a long Friday in the office so I'll leave this here for fun:

I just saw on social media that the wife of DH's good childhood friend threw herself a big ole baby shower. . . . for her fourth child in 6 years.  I was not invited

BECAUSE

I'm still on her sh*tlist because we didn't have children at our wedding 5 years ago when their oldest daughter was about one and a half.  She was especially annoyed because DH is that daughter's godfather (we had no children at the wedding at all).  We owned that decision, and accepted that she wouldn't come to the wedding without her daughter.  Our decisions was confirmed a month before the wedding

BECAUSE

we were all together at another wedding where that child was invited.  The MOG did a spotlight interpretive dance for the couple that the child ran out into the middle of.  One big arm swing knocked her over and the child's mom was so pissed.  Later the child needed to be changed into her PJs which the mom did. . . at the table. . . placing the dirty diaper on her salad plate for the waitstaff to remove!

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Re: Etiquette. . . we don't need no stinking etiquette

  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer

    southernbelle0915 said:



    thisismynickname said:





    kaos16 said:



    It looks like today is shaping up to be a long Friday in the office so I'll leave this here for fun:

    I just saw on social media that the wife of DH's good childhood friend threw herself a big ole baby shower. . . . for her fourth child in 6 years.  I was not invited

    BECAUSE

    I'm still on her sh*tlist because we didn't have children at our wedding 5 years ago when their oldest daughter was about one and a half.  She was especially annoyed because DH is that daughter's godfather (we had no children at the wedding at all).  We owned that decision, and accepted that she wouldn't come to the wedding without her daughter.  Our decisions was confirmed a month before the wedding

    BECAUSE

    we were all together at another wedding where that child was invited.  The MOG did a spotlight interpretive dance for the couple that the child ran out into the middle of.  One big arm swing knocked her over and the child's mom was so pissed.  Later the child needed to be changed into her PJs which the mom did. . . at the table. . . placing the dirty diaper on her salad plate for the waitstaff to remove!







    I draw the line at this. I would have flat out told her that is GROSS and to throw it away herself. 




    Or change the baby in the bathroom. Where there's soap and water for your hands afterwards. Or if there's no changing table, go to your car and use hand sanitizer. I just can't..


    OMG yes, if I'd noticed she was going to change the baby at the table before things got too far along. 

    ________________________________


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  • MCmeowMCmeow member
    500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper
    SO many things. She is the definition of why people want child-free weddings. I shudder thinking about dirty diapers next to where I'm eating  :s
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  • lyndausvilyndausvi mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
     :o 






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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  • SP29SP29 member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    kaos16 said:



    STARMOON44 said:


    Wait wait. The MOG did a spotlight interpretive dance??





    Oh yes.  Groom's mom enjoys dance.  She is a gym teacher by profession and likes Zumba.  As a surprise to her son and new daughter in law she changed out of her fancy dress into a lovely leotard and did the whole shebang.  I want to say that the song was "I hope you dance" but I can't remember exactly.

    This was the same wedding where I was seated next to the fitness model wife of another of DH's friends. She grabbed a waiter before dinner to explain that she was allergic to butter, oil, everything and that she could only have a piece of grilled chicken and some steamed green veggies with nothing on either.  They ran around to accommodate her, she proceeded to get drunk on vodka (the poor hungry girl) and devoured about half the dessert table herself, double fisting pastries.

    It was amazing!!



    OMG! Sounds like the best worst wedding ever!
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    edited June 2017
    Drama drama drama. More than in a Best Picture Oscar-winning movie.
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  • MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited June 2017
    You sure have an interesting bunch of associates. I doubt that anyone could top those examples of horrid etiquette.





                       
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  • short+sassyshort+sassy member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    MairePoppy said:

    @PrettyGirlLost - I should have know someone would rise to the occasion.

    The worst wedding etiquette example I have involves  a bride who was two hours late for her own wedding. I swear, this is not an exaggeration. It was in August, full Catholic mass for whenever the bride showed up. No air conditioning. My cousin was the nervous, pacing groom. My daughter was a flower girl and with the bride so we couldn't leave. My Memere, God bless her, got so hot she rolled her stockings down to her ankles, right there in the church. The priest changed his homily to talk about consideration and tardiness. He was a good friend of the MOB and fully expected the bride to be late, not that late, though.

    After the ceremony, the wedding party, parents and grandparents went for a long photo session. The bride was pissed when the photos came back with Memere and her rolled down stockings. Bride had the balls to tell my grandmother she ruined her wedding album. Photographer must not have know how to photo shop or clip. Or maybe he was pissed at the bride.


    Image result for Mamas family


    WOW!!!  That is just unreal.  I guess because it was "her day", it was okay to leave all the guests...and her GROOM...waiting for two hours.  Geez, your poor cousin.

    Inquiring minds want to know!  While everyone was sitting in the church waiting for her, were there rumors being whispered that she wasn't going to show?  I'm picturing the gossip flying.

    Did a whole bunch of guests bail out and leave?  I understand why you couldn't leave.  But, if I were a guest, I would have left long before the bride showed up.  And then I would have been at home stalking Facebook, to see if she had been a "runaway" bride.

    More curiosity, why wouldn't a church have a/c?  I'd think normal Sunday masses in August were none too pleasant either.

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  • short+sassyshort+sassy member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    PrettyGirlLost said:



    short+sassy said:





    MairePoppy said:



    @PrettyGirlLost - I should have know someone would rise to the occasion.

    The worst wedding etiquette example I have involves  a bride who was two hours late for her own wedding. I swear, this is not an exaggeration. It was in August, full Catholic mass for whenever the bride showed up. No air conditioning. My cousin was the nervous, pacing groom. My daughter was a flower girl and with the bride so we couldn't leave. My Memere, God bless her, got so hot she rolled her stockings down to her ankles, right there in the church. The priest changed his homily to talk about consideration and tardiness. He was a good friend of the MOB and fully expected the bride to be late, not that late, though.

    After the ceremony, the wedding party, parents and grandparents went for a long photo session. The bride was pissed when the photos came back with Memere and her rolled down stockings. Bride had the balls to tell my grandmother she ruined her wedding album. Photographer must not have know how to photo shop or clip. Or maybe he was pissed at the bride.


    Image result for Mamas family






    WOW!!!  That is just unreal.  I guess because it was "her day", it was okay to leave all the guests...and her GROOM...waiting for two hours.  Geez, your poor cousin.

    Inquiring minds want to know!  While everyone was sitting in the church waiting for her, were there rumors being whispered that she wasn't going to show?  I'm picturing the gossip flying.

    Did a whole bunch of guests bail out and leave?  I understand why you couldn't leave.  But, if I were a guest, I would have left long before the bride showed up.  And then I would have been at home stalking Facebook, to see if she had been a "runaway" bride.

    More curiosity, why wouldn't a church have a/c?  I'd think normal Sunday masses in August were none too pleasant either.





    Beautiful, old ass, pre 1900s and early 1900s stone buildings don't typically have AC.

    My church did not, my 120+ year old house does not ;-)


    Thanks!  That hasn't been the experience where I live, even for old buildings (though not usually made out of stone) but then, I also have limited experience with old churches.

    I'm with you!  My own house is 100+years old and it doesn't have central a/c.  But I do have window units in almost all the rooms.  I looked into adding it when I first bought the house, but it was insanely expensive because there was none of that ductwork.  And the a/c guy wasn't even sure how/where they'd be able to configure everything.

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  • sparklepants41sparklepants41 member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    PrettyGirlLost said:



    short+sassy said:





    MairePoppy said:



    @PrettyGirlLost - I should have know someone would rise to the occasion.

    The worst wedding etiquette example I have involves  a bride who was two hours late for her own wedding. I swear, this is not an exaggeration. It was in August, full Catholic mass for whenever the bride showed up. No air conditioning. My cousin was the nervous, pacing groom. My daughter was a flower girl and with the bride so we couldn't leave. My Memere, God bless her, got so hot she rolled her stockings down to her ankles, right there in the church. The priest changed his homily to talk about consideration and tardiness. He was a good friend of the MOB and fully expected the bride to be late, not that late, though.

    After the ceremony, the wedding party, parents and grandparents went for a long photo session. The bride was pissed when the photos came back with Memere and her rolled down stockings. Bride had the balls to tell my grandmother she ruined her wedding album. Photographer must not have know how to photo shop or clip. Or maybe he was pissed at the bride.


    Image result for Mamas family






    WOW!!!  That is just unreal.  I guess because it was "her day", it was okay to leave all the guests...and her GROOM...waiting for two hours.  Geez, your poor cousin.

    Inquiring minds want to know!  While everyone was sitting in the church waiting for her, were there rumors being whispered that she wasn't going to show?  I'm picturing the gossip flying.

    Did a whole bunch of guests bail out and leave?  I understand why you couldn't leave.  But, if I were a guest, I would have left long before the bride showed up.  And then I would have been at home stalking Facebook, to see if she had been a "runaway" bride.

    More curiosity, why wouldn't a church have a/c?  I'd think normal Sunday masses in August were none too pleasant either.





    Beautiful, old ass, pre 1900s and early 1900s stone buildings don't typically have AC.

    My church did not, my 120+ year old house does not ;-)


    Yes. And there are a number of historic, quaint, wood-frame churches on Cape Cod that do not have AC. I have sat through quite a few summer weddings on the Cape that had full Catholic masses in these churches without AC. 
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  • JediElizabethJediElizabeth member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer

    sparklepants41 said:



    PrettyGirlLost said:





    short+sassy said:







    MairePoppy said:




    @PrettyGirlLost - I should have know someone would rise to the occasion.

    The worst wedding etiquette example I have involves  a bride who was two hours late for her own wedding. I swear, this is not an exaggeration. It was in August, full Catholic mass for whenever the bride showed up. No air conditioning. My cousin was the nervous, pacing groom. My daughter was a flower girl and with the bride so we couldn't leave. My Memere, God bless her, got so hot she rolled her stockings down to her ankles, right there in the church. The priest changed his homily to talk about consideration and tardiness. He was a good friend of the MOB and fully expected the bride to be late, not that late, though.

    After the ceremony, the wedding party, parents and grandparents went for a long photo session. The bride was pissed when the photos came back with Memere and her rolled down stockings. Bride had the balls to tell my grandmother she ruined her wedding album. Photographer must not have know how to photo shop or clip. Or maybe he was pissed at the bride.


    Image result for Mamas family








    WOW!!!  That is just unreal.  I guess because it was "her day", it was okay to leave all the guests...and her GROOM...waiting for two hours.  Geez, your poor cousin.

    Inquiring minds want to know!  While everyone was sitting in the church waiting for her, were there rumors being whispered that she wasn't going to show?  I'm picturing the gossip flying.

    Did a whole bunch of guests bail out and leave?  I understand why you couldn't leave.  But, if I were a guest, I would have left long before the bride showed up.  And then I would have been at home stalking Facebook, to see if she had been a "runaway" bride.

    More curiosity, why wouldn't a church have a/c?  I'd think normal Sunday masses in August were none too pleasant either.







    Beautiful, old ass, pre 1900s and early 1900s stone buildings don't typically have AC.

    My church did not, my 120+ year old house does not ;-)




    Yes. And there are a number of historic, quaint, wood-frame churches on Cape Cod that do not have AC. I have sat through quite a few summer weddings on the Cape that had full Catholic masses in these churches without AC. 


    It depends on the area, too. Paterson, NJ has plenty of absolutely beautiful churches in what are now very poor areas. I have friends whose very beautiful (Protestant) churches wouldn't be able to afford the electricity for AC, even if they had the units.

    Not sure about the structure of the Catholic Church and whether or not the larger diocese would foot that bill now that I think about it, though. 
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  • flantasticflantastic member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    JediElizabeth said:



    sparklepants41 said:





    PrettyGirlLost said:







    short+sassy said:









    MairePoppy said:





    @PrettyGirlLost - I should have know someone would rise to the occasion.

    The worst wedding etiquette example I have involves  a bride who was two hours late for her own wedding. I swear, this is not an exaggeration. It was in August, full Catholic mass for whenever the bride showed up. No air conditioning. My cousin was the nervous, pacing groom. My daughter was a flower girl and with the bride so we couldn't leave. My Memere, God bless her, got so hot she rolled her stockings down to her ankles, right there in the church. The priest changed his homily to talk about consideration and tardiness. He was a good friend of the MOB and fully expected the bride to be late, not that late, though.

    After the ceremony, the wedding party, parents and grandparents went for a long photo session. The bride was pissed when the photos came back with Memere and her rolled down stockings. Bride had the balls to tell my grandmother she ruined her wedding album. Photographer must not have know how to photo shop or clip. Or maybe he was pissed at the bride.


    Image result for Mamas family










    WOW!!!  That is just unreal.  I guess because it was "her day", it was okay to leave all the guests...and her GROOM...waiting for two hours.  Geez, your poor cousin.

    Inquiring minds want to know!  While everyone was sitting in the church waiting for her, were there rumors being whispered that she wasn't going to show?  I'm picturing the gossip flying.

    Did a whole bunch of guests bail out and leave?  I understand why you couldn't leave.  But, if I were a guest, I would have left long before the bride showed up.  And then I would have been at home stalking Facebook, to see if she had been a "runaway" bride.

    More curiosity, why wouldn't a church have a/c?  I'd think normal Sunday masses in August were none too pleasant either.









    Beautiful, old ass, pre 1900s and early 1900s stone buildings don't typically have AC.

    My church did not, my 120+ year old house does not ;-)






    Yes. And there are a number of historic, quaint, wood-frame churches on Cape Cod that do not have AC. I have sat through quite a few summer weddings on the Cape that had full Catholic masses in these churches without AC. 




    It depends on the area, too. Paterson, NJ has plenty of absolutely beautiful churches in what are now very poor areas. I have friends whose very beautiful (Protestant) churches wouldn't be able to afford the electricity for AC, even if they had the units.

    Not sure about the structure of the Catholic Church and whether or not the larger diocese would foot that bill now that I think about it, though. 


    Nope. The diocese has no money or money-making ability of its own, really. It takes a cut of what the parishes bring in to run itself.
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  • MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited June 2017




    short+sassy said:









    MairePoppy said:





    @PrettyGirlLost - I should have know someone would rise to the occasion.

    The worst wedding etiquette example I have involves  a bride who was two hours late for her own wedding. I swear, this is not an exaggeration. It was in August, full Catholic mass for whenever the bride showed up. No air conditioning. My cousin was the nervous, pacing groom. My daughter was a flower girl and with the bride so we couldn't leave. My Memere, God bless her, got so hot she rolled her stockings down to her ankles, right there in the church. The priest changed his homily to talk about consideration and tardiness. He was a good friend of the MOB and fully expected the bride to be late, not that late, though.

    After the ceremony, the wedding party, parents and grandparents went for a long photo session. The bride was pissed when the photos came back with Memere and her rolled down stockings. Bride had the balls to tell my grandmother she ruined her wedding album. Photographer must not have know how to photo shop or clip. Or maybe he was pissed at the bride.


    Image result for Mamas family










    WOW!!!  That is just unreal.  I guess because it was "her day", it was okay to leave all the guests...and her GROOM...waiting for two hours.  Geez, your poor cousin.

    Inquiring minds want to know!  While everyone was sitting in the church waiting for her, were there rumors being whispered that she wasn't going to show?  I'm picturing the gossip flying.

    Did a whole bunch of guests bail out and leave?  I understand why you couldn't leave.  But, if I were a guest, I would have left long before the bride showed up.  And then I would have been at home stalking Facebook, to see if she had been a "runaway" bride.

    More curiosity, why wouldn't a church have a/c?  I'd think normal Sunday masses in August were none too pleasant either.









    Every day is her day. Many of her family members are chronically late, so none of them left, as far as I know. They expected it. My family members are compulsively punctual so we were all very annoyed. Some left to go ahead to the reception, but most stayed to support my cousin, JIC. MOG was hoping she wouldn't show :) They have been married @30 years now and the reason we remember that wedding is because she was so late. 

    @short+sassy The Catholic church that I once belonged to was built in 1908. It's gorgeous with very high cathedral ceilings. It also has very high stained glass windows that can be propped open for a breeze, if there is one. It was very, very hot in July and August. My MIL passed out in church more than once. She said sitting in hot church was nothing compared to the way we'd suffer if we didn't go. The church finally raised enough money about 10 years ago to install air conditioning of some sort. 

    ETA - The diocese doesn't support the parishes. It's the other way around. A huge chunk of the money that the churches raise go directly to the diocese. 
                       
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  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer

    MairePoppy said:

    @short+sassy The Catholic church that I once belonged to was built in 1908. It's gorgeous with very high cathedral ceilings. It also has very high stained glass windows that can be propped open for a breeze, if there is one. It was very, very hot in July and August. My MIL passed out in church more than once. She said sitting in hot church was nothing compared to the way we'd suffer if we didn't go. The church finally raised enough money about 10 years ago to install air conditioning of some sort. 



    The bolded absolutely cracks me up. For those who do indeed believe in Hell... this is perfectly logical! 

    I've only attended one wedding in a non-AC church in July. The programs were fans. I, for one, greatly appreciated that. 
    ________________________________


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