Thoughts on this sister proposal

kaos16

I was just reading this article about a man who proposed to his now fiancé, then "proposed" to her sister who happens to have Down Syndrome, essentially proposing to always be her friend.  What do my lovely Knottie ladies think about this type of proposal?  I know we talk often about proposing to kids, or making vows to kids, etc.  Do you find this to be similar? different?

http://www.fox5ny.com/news/264866181-story

charlotte989875

Maybe I'm too snarky and cynical but I'm not a fan. I feel like it's saying "she will never meet anyone who will propose to her so I'm proposing so she can sort of  feel like that" which just rubs me the wrong way. Many problem who have Downs have full lives with jobs, spouses, families. I don't know it just feels wrong to me. 

justsie

I don't like it. I mean, most other people are not going to propose to a nuro-typical sibling, so the only reason he did this was because she has Down syndrome. Major eye roll and side eye combo coming from me with this. 

STARMOON44

It's offensive attention seeking nonsense. 

DrillSergeantCat

Ditto what PPs have said, but also what happens if the marriage doesn't work out? These "vows" to the sister are just lip service. I can't see a divorce happening, but he still goes fishing with her. I mean, I know it can happen, but it's really rare.

ei34

I found the whole thing attention-seeking.  Just be a good BIL and friend without making a big thing about it.

downtondiva

Can't he just be kind to her without having to make a big fuss over it?

SP29

Agreed. Over the top and inappropriate.

LondonLisa

Grossly ableist. She is an adult woman who happens to have Downs Syndrome. There are plently of people with Downs Syndrome that go on to get married, have careers, etc. This is essentially treating her like a child. 

Why could he not privately express how much he was looking forward to being her brother in law and just be a good friend. 

knottie77380c59bc9c88ec

Wow what an attention-seeker, for me that's just utterly weird

knottiec0607c2fda3eba98

I know many people who have down syndrome should never be limited. This was just trying to be a sweet thing. You do not know their relationships or her sister relationship. They could have a really close relationship and he want to let her know they will never change that. I won't rip it all a part. I do see all your points. It does look like he is limiting her and it may be saying she may never be purposed. I do think its a little weird but its still a kind thing he did and made her day.