Invites and Paper

Wording for 2 married pastors?

Hi guys,
I'm working on my invitations and I realized I don't know how to word this couple's invitation.  2 married, Lutheran pastors (one of which will be retired by the time of my wedding).

How would you address their invitation??  Thanks for the advice!

Re: Wording for 2 married pastors?

  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 25 Answers
    edited July 16
    The Reverends Jane and John Smith
    The Reverend Jane Smith and The Reverend John Smith

    Either one works.  Once a Reverend, always a Reverend.  Retirement doesn't change the title.

    (Edited, after I checked.)
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
    southernbelle0915
  • ernursejernursej member
    Tenth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    You could always ask them how they would prefer to be addressed for the invite. I find that is better than assuming.
    CMGragainsouthernbelle0915
  • I also have heard mixed opinions on this. Some people say it should always be "The Reverend," but others say it depends on their college degree - if they have a doctorate degree then it's "The Reverend." So I think the general rule of thumb is to use The Reverend unless they use/prefer a different title. Maybe you can check the church website to see how they refer to themselves. I have also heard mixed opinions on "The Reverends" (plural)- some say it is improper and that each should be addressed individually "The Reverend Jane Smith and The Reverend John Smith." Additionally, some pastors hate the abbreviation Rev. and want it as The Reverend, while others don't care. I had a former pastor who really disliked "The Reverend" and preferred to be addressed as pastor, even in formal written situations. So much variation due to what they personally prefer. Maybe you can speak to their church secretary to find out? 
  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 25 Answers
    edited July 16
    Really, you aren't supposed to use any abbreviations except Mr., Mrs., and Ms., so "Rev." is out.  I had a married couple who were Methodist pastors, and the way I suggested is how they were usually addressed.  The big no-no would be to do The Reverend and Mrs. John Smith!

    http://www.formsofaddress.info/Pastor.html

    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • ernursejernursej member
    Tenth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    CMGragain said:
    Really, you aren't supposed to use any abbreviations except Mr., Mrs., and Ms., so "Rev." is out.  I had a married couple who were Methodist pastors, and the way I suggested is how they were usually addressed.  The big no-no would be to do The Reverend and Mrs. John Smith!

    http://www.formsofaddress.info/Pastor.html


    Unless they specifically say "address me as Rev."

    This is why I advocate for people to reach out to those they are inviting to find out how they prefer to be addressed. My Grandfather hates Mr. He finds it too formal. You never know until you ask. I really dislike Mrs. and especially Mrs. HisFirstName Last Name. That boils me over.

    ahoyweddingMairePoppy
  • The Reverends Mary and John Smith OR The Reverends Smith.  Just like if they both had doctorates, the address line would be The Doctors Miller.    http://emilypost.com/advice/addressing-a-husband-and-wife-who-are-ministers/

    CMGragain
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