Attire & Accessories Forum

Bra help?

Hello all! I have wedding dress shopping coming up next week and I'm nervous about bras. Each store told me to bring a strapless bra to try dress on with but I HATE strapless bras. I'm busty and the last time I wore one it was to my senior prom - I constantly had to pull it up and I actually went to the bathroom once to find it down to my belly button! It was useless. Because of that I've decided I'm not going to bother with any strapless dresses. So should I still bring a strapless bra or just bring my normal one I always wear and let them know when I get there?

I'm assuming it will be fine since I don't want a strapless dress, but I'm very anxious about dress shopping in general so I'm a little flustered about it!

Thanks in advance!

Re: Bra help?

  • I would bring a bra that you feel comfortable in but I wouldn't rule out strapless dresses. Depending on the style of the dress, your girls can be strapped in so that you feel comfortable and happy. I would wear the bra you feel comfortable in and then perhaps bring a strapless just to see the look in a strapless dress. You can always find a bra that works with the dress that you buy.
  • What style dress are you going for? If you're busty that's a really important consideration. 

    If you've eliminated strapless (sounds like a good idea), then whether you have a strapless bra is kind of irrelevant. If I were you, I'd consider one of those bras where you can swap out the straps for clear. that way, if you look at something with an illusion neckline (or whatever), you can at least get a better feel for what it would look like. But keep in mind that if you need the support of an actual bra with straps, you should pick a dress that allows it.
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  • Unfortunately, that same prom my $400 strapless dress broke within an hour of me wearing it. The shop told my mom and I that it would be great even though I'm busty but the boning in the bodice broke. :neutral: So I've been forever scarred from wearing a strapless dress again haha.

    I really love dresses with cap sleeves and a few other styles that are similar. I didn't think about clear straps though, that would probably look much better! 
  • I really understand where you are coming from.  In 2010 when my daughter was wedding dress shopping, 95% of the dresses were strapless ballgowns.  She refused to wear one.  Thank goodness styles are changing.
    Just wear a nice bra that you like.  Be firm with the salespeople that you do not want a strapless dress.  You will be fine.
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  • So I'm having a bra sewn into my dress. I dropped it off when I had my first fitting. My dress has straps - so they are putting small loops that the straps of the bra will slip through. The front is being sewn on either side of the neck line (that's quite deep) and they're putting loops on the back also that the bra slides through so it will be held down and you won't see it. 

    I would think about the kind of dress you think you want. I really didn't know so it wasn't helpful but if you know you don't want strapless then don't do it. I do think what southernbelle0915 said is true. If you want illusion, embroidered or a lace top you will see straps so those invisible ones would work. You can't really see them and if you can no one cares I think it's more important to be comfortable.

    I ended up buying a new bra (because it was going to be sewn in)  but if I was you I'd go with my best lowest back and front bra you own that you feel comfortable in and work from that. Make it clear to the sales person that this is what you're going to wear so they can show you things that will work.

    Also, try to chill about the dress. I did not and I really didn't like the process - I think if you chill about it a bit you'll end up having a better time

    Oh, side note doesn't do what I did and not think about your underwear and end up trying white dresses with blue panties!! not cute!
  • ei34ei34 member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 5 Answers 500 Love Its
    Maybe bring along your go-to bra when wearing dresses to other people's weddings/special events.  A lot of us have that one bra that makes us feel better than the others...see how you look and more importantly, how you feel, while wearing your best bra with possible wedding dresses.  

    Its for the opposite of your reason, but I'd had some chest-related anxiety when trying on dresses too.  I thought nothing would look/fit right, and several dresses didn't, but I did wear a dress I loved on my wedding day.  Try not to get discouraged if you try on a few in a row you don't like.  And make sure your consultant is really listening to your worries as well as your hopes.  Good luck :) 
  • Also, keep in mind that many strapless dresses can have straps added. I did that and loved the results. 
  • Also keep in mind that many dresses with straps may still need a strapless bra. Spaghetti strap dresses, for example, or those with illusion necklines. I hate strapless dresses and refused to buy one, but my wedding dress still needed a strapless bra (the neckline was similar to the dress below). I actually wore stick on cups, which I liked, but I wouldn't recommend them for bustier people. 

    However, if you know 100% for certain that, no matter what, you are not going to buy a strapless dress or a dress with sheer straps or something else going on where bra straps could be visible, no, I don't think you need to bring a strapless bra. 


  • I have ZERO luck with simple strapless bras (WTF - shy of duck tape nothing is keeping regular ones up!)..  I have been o.k. with long-line bras, which David's is where I purchased mine from.  But for what it's worth, you want a dress you can wear your regular "dressy" bra in, go with the bra you want to wear!
  • I completely understand where you are coming from on this.  When I went wedding dress shopping, I did as others here have recommended and took my go-to bra.  I am also very busty - 32G, which may or may not be close to you.  Because of this, I just flat out was not going to try on any dress I could not wear a normal bra with.  I tried on many dresses that had straps, but almost all were too low in the back to wear a normal bra with.  It was a frustrating process, because I agree that strapless bras at this size just do not stay in place.

    Then I dropped into the shop where I ultimately bought my dress and told the owner about some other things I was looking for in a dress - no lace, which is hard to find these days!  She pointed to a strapless ballgown, the exact opposite of anything I had considered or was remotely interested in wearing.  I tried it on and was so blown away by the construction of the gown's bodice that I went for it.  Not only was the boning beyond solid, the gown had two "seatbelts" on the inside that keep the gown hugged in around you.  Many gowns have these belts on the inside.  What I found was that by the time I found a great strapless bra - go see a legit professional bra fitter at an independent shop if you don't already - the bodice of the gown plus the belts helped hold up the bra.  I would have never believed any of it had I not tried it on.  If I had the experience you had, I might also be paranoid about the boning, but in this instance, the dress held up really well.

    Here's the dress:  https://www.justinalexander.com/en/justin-alexander/collection/wedding-dresses/8779/#crl8-gallery
    Here's the bra: https://www.herroom.com/fit-fully-yours-b1011-felicia-strapless-bra.shtml

    One thing to consider regarding having a bra sewn into a gown is that when you are so busty, the bra will then move with the gown and not with you.  By the time I had this gown altered, I was able to wear the strapless bra and not have to sew it in.  Also, if you have straps added, they may not be "tough" enough to provide support if you're very busty.  They might be nice for aesthetics, but maybe not enough for support.  You should do what you feel most comfortable with, but I was right in your shoes, and I shocked myself by choosing a strapless.
  • I wore a regular nude-colored bra to go dress-shopping. I was absolutely against strapless dresses and also didn't want to "add straps", and I basically had to fight with the sales people about it. They kept saying the dress would hold me up, and look good, etc., and I had to keep saying "I think strapless dresses are unattractive. Period. I don't care how good I'd look in it, if I think the dress is ugly I'm not buying it". 

    Anyway, with a regular bra, you'll just have to tuck the straps out of the way if you find a dress you think you really like and want to get an image of what it would really look like.

    I ended up with a dress that had great straps, but it was in a sheer beaded material so I didn't wear a regular bra. I had a long-line strapless bra that was sewn into my dress and worked out great. But It was no problem at all trying the dress on with a regular bra on!
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