hello
There are 6 kids in my family that I would love to have a part of my wedding.
2 (brother and sister) are going to be my ring bear and flower girl cuz I’m a bit closer to them than the others and the other four are close with each other that it would be unfair to choose one of them without all of them. (If that makes sense)
Anyway I was thinking that I’d love to have the oldest (6 & 7) hand out programs. I’m trying to think of something else that the other kids (4 & 5) could help with during the ceremony.
Ideas appreciated
TIA
Re: Need “jobs” for kids
And I wouldn't try to shoehorn small kids into "roles" other than ring bearer or flower girl. If you don't want them to fill those roles, then just invite them as guests, take some nice photos with them, and perhaps do a special dance with them. But let it go at that. Especially if your sole reason for asking any of them to be in your wedding party is out of "fairness" to those whom you wouldn't otherwise ask.
Here's the thing - if the kids have "jobs" their parents need to supervise those jobs (they're only 4-7 y/o). It really limits how social their parents can be. As a parent, I'd be 162X more grateful to have an activity packet that would keep my kid entertained than having to buy a special outfit and having to stand there supervising my kid dole out programs.
FTR, if the kids were older and didn't need supervision, I think this would be a different story.
Worrying about every kid having a role would be like worrying about making every friend a bridesmaid. You’re just closer to some people over others, that’s okay.
But to echo PP- the children don't need 'jobs'. In fact, I think it will be much more stressful for everyone. Give them an activity book and let them enjoy the day.
Cosigning activity packets!
Just let them be kids. When I was 10 or so, my sister was the flower girl for a wedding. The bride had the same idea as you, so I was the guest book attendant. I was like, "really?" Even at 10 I knew I was getting shafted.
Are all of these kids cousins? Or are they all siblings?
My FG and RB are siblings with each other and not as close to the other kids.
The other four are 2 sets of siblings but are almost being raised as siblings since they live so close and are at their grandma's house during the days.
So "splitting them up" would be odd. Which is another reason I decided on the other 2 cousins as RB and FG.
I'm have a kids table at the reception with small toys for them to play with until they can run around on the dance floor.
When you say "kids table" - do you mean that you have a table just for those kids without adults? I'd be careful about that because the parents may want them to be at their table .... it's might work, it might not. Just be prepared to go with the flow.
If it is important to both the children/parents, AND you/your FI, then I don’t think it’s wrong to include them at all, though I do agree that auxiliary roles like program passer-outer or guest book attendee aren’t really honored roles. What about having one set of kids carry a family Bible or other special text for readings up to the alter, and another set (preferably older) light a candle or two honoring loved ones who have passed? It’s also not uncommon to have multiple flower girls or ring bearers, if that’s something you’d like to consider.
If you can’t imagine your day without them included, go for one of these options that truly highlights them in the ceremony. If you’re just including them to include them or because you feel obligated to, maybe instead get a special cousins photo at the alter after the ceremony.
Just remember, who you include in your wedding should be a reflection of who means the most to you and your FI. No need to assign roles just to assign roles, this isn’t Oprah
Best of luck planning!