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Wedding Woes

I think y'all need more work to do.

Dear Prudence,
Our office shares a double restroom with another company that occupies the floor of our building. This has never been an issue because 10 women work in our office and no women worked at the other company. Then they hired a new female employee. A few weeks ago, I noticed that every single time I used the restroom, she was already occupying the other stall and stayed after I left. I understand that some trips take a bit longer, but even when I would leave the restroom to give her privacy, coming back after as long as 30 minutes, she would still be in the other stall. This has become such a frequent occurrence that every single other woman I work with has mentioned it, initially as a joke. But it’s turning into a very weird and protracted issue. Oftentimes we can hear her music (she wears giant over-ear headphones during these trips) and see the screen from her iPhone as she spends up to 40 minutes in a stall. We’re left to awkwardly schedule the use of the other stall around the rare occasions she leaves the restroom. Recognizing that this could be health-related, is there any hope of solving this problem? The issue comes up multiple times a day, but none of us can see a solution to this beyond leaving a ridiculously awkward note in the bathroom. Are we all stuck playing hide-and-go-seek with a stranger?
—Restroom Relaxation

Re: I think y'all need more work to do.

  • ShesSoColdShesSoCold bend over and I'll show ya mod
    Moderator 5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its
    How is this a problem? There's another stall. Use it. 
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    STARMOON44OliveOilsMomcharlotte989875PrettyGirlLost
  • levioosalevioosa Southern California member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    If they put this sleuthing effort into their actual work they probably wouldn’t even notice. There’s another stall. Use it. 


    image
    PrettyGirlLost
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    We have 6 stalls in our bathroom, so it's never a problem, but there ARE people who spend their breaks on their phone here in my building too.  I usually go into the stairwell for shit like that. 

  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom South Jersey member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    LW even acknowledges this could be a health issue, so what else is there to say?  If its not, the employer will discover their employee is disappearing throughout the day for extended periods.  It is on the employer to do anything further about it!  Perhaps she has already provided a doctor's note for Chron's or an equally bad disease that causes long trips to the bathroom.  LW needs to worry about something else.  And really?  They are scheduling their bathroom trips around this woman?  Just wait for the a stall to open up like normal people!
  • Who cares??? As long as you can use the other stall when you want why is this an issue?
  • How is it even a health issue if there’s another stall??
    But if it bothered me this much, the awkward, passive-aggressive bathroom note would come before asking Prudie
  • This isn’t a health issue, this is a “someonenisndoing something differently than I do so it must be wrong and they should stop” issue. 
    PrettyGirlLostSTARMOON44MesmrEwe
  • I fully admit that I find this woman's length bathroom trips very strange. However, there is another stall available, so LW and her colleagues need to get over their discomfort and quit wasting their time on this. If this woman is really in there as much as they are claiming, it's much more her employer's problem than theirs.
    image
    charlotte989875Jen4948short+sassy
  • LondonLisaLondonLisa London, UK member
    2500 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Leaning in doesn’t mean beneith the stall door...

    JFC what a bunch of mean girls. 
    charlotte989875Jen4948PrettyGirlLostOliveOilsMom
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Use the other stall and mind your own business.

    As long as this woman gets her work done on schedule and to specs given by the boss, who cares what she does in the bathroom?
    PrettyGirlLost
  • ShesSoColdShesSoCold bend over and I'll show ya mod
    Moderator 5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its
    I mean, so when I have to "go to dad's" at work (my code phrase), I prefer to do that alone in the bathroom. Would this be a slight annoyance to me? Sure. But not enough to even say something to a coworker, let alone write freaking Prudie.
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  • PrettyGirlLostPrettyGirlLost A Land Filled with Unicorns and Cat Hair member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    eileenrob said:
    How is it even a health issue if there’s another stall??
    But if it bothered me this much, the awkward, passive-aggressive bathroom note would come before asking Prudie
    And if the woman in question has a medical condition these gossips don't know about, like Crohn's, ulcerative colitis, etc. that woman could take that note to HR to complain.

    They need to get over themselves and use the damn bathroom, regardless of whether she's in there.  Or go use the bathroom on another floor if they can't use the loo with another person present.  And just mind their own damn business regarding how long she's in there and what she's doing.

    I'm sure her boss will be on it if her bathroom time is an actual issue.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


    charlotte989875
  • At first I thought "that's terrible, I do hate pooping when someone else is in the other stall and will do anything I possibly can to avoid having to do it with someone else in the [small office] bathroom", but then LW said this other woman is wearing headphones, so honestly, just take your loud poop and get through it.
    charlotte989875OliveOilsMomeileenrob
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    eileenrob said:
    How is it even a health issue if there’s another stall??
    But if it bothered me this much, the awkward, passive-aggressive bathroom note would come before asking Prudie
    And if the woman in question has a medical condition these gossips don't know about, like Crohn's, ulcerative colitis, etc. that woman could take that note to HR to complain.

    They need to get over themselves and use the damn bathroom, regardless of whether she's in there.  Or go use the bathroom on another floor if they can't use the loo with another person present.  And just mind their own damn business regarding how long she's in there and what she's doing.

    I'm sure her boss will be on it if her bathroom time is an actual issue.
    LW said that the woman works for a different company, on the same floor of their office building. So woman's HR has no authority over LW and the bitches.

    Likewise, even if woman is completely neglecting her duties and causing problems with her team, it is none of LW's concern.  
  • This is odd and it would be annoying me as well.  Not b/c of her being in there, who cares, but if she's taking so long, multiple times a day and effectively having 1 woman using 1 stall after they've been used to 2...IDK, my bladder/tummy aren't the best these days and I'd be telling her to move the hell along someplace else to stream Netflix.
    MesmrEwe
  • GBCKGBCK member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    if it's 2 stalls, WTF can't they just ask to make both bathrooms unisex?
    Because then there are 4 stalls.
    fucking gendered restrooms always halving the # of stalls for women.
    VarunaTT
  • This is an issue to take up with the landlord the next contract renewal "We need another stall..."  
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