Long Post - Love Obsessed Work Associate
Edited because I shouldn't call her crazy - that’s not fair.
So – I think I mentioned my co-worker who is really needy on this forum before. This might be complicated and long, but try to follow:
She was in a relationship with someone for 4 years and it was volatile. They argued a ton and they just were not a good fit. She meets another person and moves out of her and her ex’s apartment on without telling him and immediately moved in with the new guy.
She was with the new guy for 6 months then found out they aren’t compatible (not shocking after she moved in with the guy after only knowing him for 1 month), and kicked him out of HIS APARTMENT and is living there until the lease is up and he’s paying ½ the rent (she is not on the lease). I keep asking her what she’s going to do because she needs to find a place to live by January and she’s nonchalant and does not seem stressed at all about potentially being homeless.
While living in the 2nd ex’s apartment, she meets another guy on a dating app about 6 weeks ago. He just moved to the city and they meet up and hit it off. He’s a teacher, so they started hanging out right when school started so he was really busy.
He would text her every three days, usually after a flurry of texts from her checking in and trying to set up plans to meet up. She said he told her several times there was no one else and she was set on thinking that this was moving to something serious, but she could not handle the fact that he would not text her back. I told her that they were only hanging out and that she did not have the right to dictate how he communicates as they were just hanging out and not serious.
At this point she was texting me and instant messaging me and pulling me to the side to cry about this guy who she had only been hanging out with for six weeks. I was trying my best to be supportive, but I finally told her that she should just move on, because they were obviously on different pages when it came to what they wanted out of this relationship.
Well – he finally text her and told her that they would be better friends than lovers and that he really liked her as a person, but he’s just not looking for something serious. He said he feels like there is more of a connection on a friendship level vs. a boyfriend/girlfriend level. She’s very upset because they were intimate several times and she thinks he’s lying. I told her to drop it and move on – but she won’t.
I can’t take this anymore. She’s driving by his apartment, making fake tinder profiles to see if he’s active on there, checking all his social media accounts. I feel like I’m trying to be a good friend, but I’m to the point of telling her I can’t give her anymore advice because she’s losing her shit over a guy she’s only known for six weeks.
I don’t know what to do to get through to her.