I have wondered for years if I am bisexual. When I was younger, I even discussed the possibility with my mother. Part of my hesitation may have come from my religion: I was raised in a strict Lutheran synod. I’m 30 years old at this point, and I still wonder. While I’m still Christian, I’m not sure I belong with that synod. I even think my mother still wonders because she’s mentioned a few times recently that if I wasn’t straight that she and my father would support me. (I don’t know if my siblings would, but that’s not a can of worms I’m willing to open right now.) I’ve never investigated things further since that conversation 14 years ago, but it weighs on my mind. I’m single and haven’t been in a relationship with a man in over two years. My longest relationship with a man was in high school. I’ve never had sex. However, I do enjoy looking at women.
While I know that alone probably doesn’t make me bisexual, I can’t help wondering still at this point in my life if maybe I am. I don’t know what to do to figure it out. I’m lost and don’t feel comfortable discussing this with the people around me—mainly because the only LGBTQ+ people in my life right now are co-workers, and that wouldn’t be an appropriate discussion for the workplace. I don’t know what to do to proceed here, and while it might seem trite, I need to know. What should i do to figure this out for myself? I’m concerned that if I reach out to a LGBTQ+ community that I’ll be judged for not being sure, but also for thinking I may be bisexual.