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Wedding Woes

Canadian Wedding Socials

CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
Can someone explain these to me? Your bridal part donates (purchases) all the booze and food and prizes etc?  Or am I interpreting this wrong?  Do Canadians have showers & bachelorette parties too?

Re: Canadian Wedding Socials

  • This is a thing for guys in buffalo too (maybe because we’re so close to Canada?). The bridal party buys all the food & booze and prizes. There’s always ton of food and booze and prizes (H has won a TV and a grill). There’s a cost for tickets for the raffles (sometimes there’s a general ticket cost and then the tickets you use for the raffles/prizes). The remaining   money (sometimes it’s used to cover food/gifts but usually not) goes all the the groom/bride. 

    For the record, H did not have one! Even he thinks they’re tacky af. 
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    They’re very popular in Winnipeg and my cousin just booked her day.  But on facebook I didnt know of her Fi was joking about her brother having to donate liquor or if its a real thing?

    so you have the social, shower & bachelorette party and some people even have an engagement party!  

    This is all to much for me.  🤯 

  • edited September 11
    I know these parties are bad etiquette but I can also see how they could be a lot of fun. Maybe just because I love a raffle, lol. I only picture this being for young couples though, I would expect the over 25 crowd to  host properly. 

    ETA:  I assumed that these parties were the bachelorette/bachelor party, not in addition to.
  • I know these parties are bad etiquette but I can also see how they could be a lot of fun. Maybe just because I love a raffle, lol. I only picture this being for young couples though, I would expect the over 25 crowd to  host properly. 

    ETA:  I assumed that these parties were the bachelorette/bachelor party, not in addition to.
    The ones I’ve been to have been really fun. Friends, good, prizes, it is a good time even though it’s totally bad etiquette. 

    The bolded has been our experience too. These are the bachelor/bachelorette parties. 
  • climbingwifeclimbingwife NYC 'burbs member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    What's the point of this party? Is it just to raise money for the bride and groom? 

  • What's the point of this party? Is it just to raise money for the bride and groom? 
    Celebrate with them like you would at a bachelor/bachelorette party. There’s just also this raffle part that yeah is a little weird (and definitely against etiquette) but it’s often more fun than just going to a bar. 
  • Idk why but I always figured it started as a way to party if you or your friends were under the drinking age but also raise money, like a rent party.
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    The purpose is to raise money for the bride/groom and the wedding.  I didn’t know it was in replacement of a bachelor/bachelorette party so that’s good!

  • Are you thinking stag & doe, bachelorette party or bridal shower?
  • Okay just a break down of stuff, but it all varies.

    Engagement party - usually hosted by bride or groom's family {often groom's}
    Often not done anymore, but usually just a bbq and something to show engagement photos

    Stag & Doe - Wedding party (both sides) does a good chunk of stuff, but there are raffles, prizes, etc. Money typically goes towards the wedding.
    We did this, but we gave those who bought stuff a percentage of money back for helping out. {none expected this to be done and it's typically not paid back}

    Bachelor/Bachelorette - so this varies on the bride and groom. I did brunch and then nails. M did a football game and bar/strip club. This is where the dirty/naughty gifts are given. Usually just bridal/groomsmen invited but it really depends on the person.
    Our M.C went with the guys and I had my mum and MIL at mine.

    Bridal Shower - usually hosted by bride's mother. This is the family one. Sometimes the groom is there, sometimes he does his own thing. M was there for a bit at the beginning and end. This is the party where (typically) the females in the family come and give gifts for the couple.
    Olden times this was where the female elders would talk to the bride about sex because she was a virgin.
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    edited September 11
    Ok i think Manitoba still calls stag/doe “socials”. I see SO much talk of ticket selling on facebook. But sounds like the same thing you described.
    edit words

    charlotte989875
  • @CharmedPam ; Yep. Sounds like the stag & doe. Never heard of it called that but I've heard it's called different things across the country.
    If they're looking for stuff to donate for the raffle, check out dollarama. I've made some xmas baskets from there for family and it wasn't expensive :) 
  • Sounds tacky to me.  Just have the fun without the fundraiser part 
    ILoveBeachMusicclimbingwifeMyNameIsNotMobKaz
  • I love attending, but didn't have one myself.  They are usually a lot of fun for attendees, but they are a lot of work and don't usually make a lot of money.  
    Though I agree with @ei34 - you could take out the fundraiser part and have a tonne of fun with them.
    imageimage
    charlotte989875
  • @kerbohl ; we found a restaurant/bar that during the party, we would get a percentage of what they earned with people buying drinks/food. We got lucky
    kerbohl
  • @MissKittyDanger I didn't know that was a thing!  That's really interesting! 
    imageimage
  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    These parties, and the opinions around them, were HUGE on these boards several years ago.  Some of the posts had wedding parties complaining regarding the incredible amount of time, energy, and money they were expected to spend to plan these parties.  Search Stag/Doe parties and let the reading fun begin.
    If I recall, it was predominantly a Canadian "tradition" but I think it trickled down to some of the more northern states in the US.  I personally find it beyond tacky to fundraise for a wedding, tradition or not.  Logic says if you plan on going out on a Saturday night, this is as good as anything in terms of having some fun, but the premise sours it for me.

  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    MobKaz said:
    These parties, and the opinions around them, were HUGE on these boards several years ago.  Some of the posts had wedding parties complaining regarding the incredible amount of time, energy, and money they were expected to spend to plan these parties.  Search Stag/Doe parties and let the reading fun begin.
    If I recall, it was predominantly a Canadian "tradition" but I think it trickled down to some of the more northern states in the US.  I personally find it beyond tacky to fundraise for a wedding, tradition or not.  Logic says if you plan on going out on a Saturday night, this is as good as anything in terms of having some fun, but the premise sours it for me.

    I was telling my co-worker about it and she said her family in Minnesota did one

  • MobKaz said:
    These parties, and the opinions around them, were HUGE on these boards several years ago.  Some of the posts had wedding parties complaining regarding the incredible amount of time, energy, and money they were expected to spend to plan these parties.  Search Stag/Doe parties and let the reading fun begin.
    If I recall, it was predominantly a Canadian "tradition" but I think it trickled down to some of the more northern states in the US.  I personally find it beyond tacky to fundraise for a wedding, tradition or not.  Logic says if you plan on going out on a Saturday night, this is as good as anything in terms of having some fun, but the premise sours it for me.

    In theory, I get how it's tacky but honestly I guess it's just typical now that people get excited for them. People love donating, chancing on winning stuff, etc.
  • WinstonsGirlWinstonsGirl The Cold North member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I had never heard of these until TK.  As far as I can tell, they're more common in southern Ontario and maybe Manitoba.  If they exist out west, I've never heard of one.  We have showers, and stagettes/bachelorettes, and an occasional engagement party.  
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • I had never heard of these until TK.  As far as I can tell, they're more common in southern Ontario and maybe Manitoba.  If they exist out west, I've never heard of one.  We have showers, and stagettes/bachelorettes, and an occasional engagement party.  
    I'm from southern ON so maybe? But I've heard in Quebec, maritimes and western provinces also, so idk ...
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