My fiancé and I are planning our wedding. He has two girls (7 and 9) from a previous relationship. We alternate weeks with their mother; the wedding date falls on the end of custody week so we can take our honeymoon before our next time with the kids. I have a good relationship with the girls but not much of one with their mother, beyond small talk. My fiancé deals with his ex, and she has requested to come to the wedding to “support” the girls. The girls have not expressed any stress over the wedding to their father or the rest of the family. In fact they are very excited to give their dad away during the ceremony. I don’t want this woman at my wedding. She isn’t a horrible human being, but she was not happy when I started dating her ex-husband. She has subsequently made a few attempts at “reconciliation.” Our guest list is small, and I honestly don’t want to have anyone there who isn’t going to support us as a couple. We are starting our lives and our family together. Is it all right to put my foot down? My husband just doesn’t want to cause a rift right before everything gets thrown into wedding mode. We are juggling a lot of balls in the air. If the girls were small, I would understand, but not this.
—Ex at the Wedding