Non-Wedding Party "Jobs" For Kids in Weddings

mwwber

So we are having a bit of a conundrum of how to include a few family members in our wedding. We decided from the very beginning we would do no siblings in our wedding parties, primarily because my fiance and I have 3 sisters each, and only one brother between the two of us, so it would be six on my side, one on his, without any friends added to the mix yet. Along with that, I am 12 and 16 years older than two of my sisters. Don't get me wrong, I love them very much and still am close with them. However, it's not a typically sister bond, as we didn't really grow up together. Especially with the younger one, I almost have more parental relationship. That being said, we agreed on no siblings and our families are more than fine with it. If we have none, nobody is included while someone else is left out. And that's just for the wedding party - if anyone wants to be included or have a "job" in another way, we plan on figuring that out.

However, my fiance has 4 nephews and a niece and he wants all of them included somehow, which I totally get. We are close with all the kids, and I am especially close with his 8-year-old niece, as I was her babysitter for several years. Here's the problem - his niece is the same age as my youngest sister. So while instinct may say make the kids the ring bearers and flower girl, I can't really include his niece in the wedding party without including my sister who is the same age. And if I include one sister, we've got to include them all - which we already decided against.

So my question is, what are some good jobs for kids at weddings? We were thinking about making programs and having our niece and my two youngest sisters hand them out or something like that. But I'd love more suggestions! Thanks in advance!

ILoveBeachMusic

You really don't need to make up jobs for people. Just being invited to the wedding is recognition enough. You could make sure they are invited to wedding festivities such as showers and rehearsal dinner if those are being hosted. You could also give each young family member a corsage/buttoniere. Other than a reading during the service there really isn't a job to be done. If you are having a religious ceremony though, kids could be acolytes or bring up the elements for communion (if applicable).

MobKaz

knottie2db8281d9a820d88 said:

So we are having a bit of a conundrum of how to include a few family members in our wedding. We decided from the very beginning we would do no siblings in our wedding parties, primarily because my fiance and I have 3 sisters each, and only one brother between the two of us, so it would be six on my side, one on his, without any friends added to the mix yet. Along with that, I am 12 and 16 years older than two of my sisters. Don't get me wrong, I love them very much and still am close with them. However, it's not a typically sister bond, as we didn't really grow up together. Especially with the younger one, I almost have more parental relationship. That being said, we agreed on no siblings and our families are more than fine with it. If we have none, nobody is included while someone else is left out. And that's just for the wedding party - if anyone wants to be included or have a "job" in another way, we plan on figuring that out.

However, my fiance has 4 nephews and a niece and he wants all of them included somehow, which I totally get. We are close with all the kids, and I am especially close with his 8-year-old niece, as I was her babysitter for several years. Here's the problem - his niece is the same age as my youngest sister. So while instinct may say make the kids the ring bearers and flower girl, I can't really include his niece in the wedding party without including my sister who is the same age. And if I include one sister, we've got to include them all - which we already decided against.

So my question is, what are some good jobs for kids at weddings? We were thinking about making programs and having our niece and my two youngest sisters hand them out or something like that. But I'd love more suggestions! Thanks in advance!

You can each have your respective sisters stand with you and your FI.  You then have the one brother, the 4 nephews, and the niece. Sides do NOT have to be even.  Include the brother to the "appropriate" side.  You can then have the niece and nephews be the ring bearers and flower girl.

Don't create jobs just to make them feel more inclusive.  As @ILov@ILoveBeachMusic said, once they become part of the wedding party, they need to be included in the rehearsal dinner.  They also need to arrive early enough the day of the wedding.  They will also potentially require special attire if you want them to "match" in any way.  These issues may pose a burden of their parents, either of time or finances. 

Jen4948

knottie2db8281d9a820d88 said:

So we are having a bit of a conundrum of how to include a few family members in our wedding. We decided from the very beginning we would do no siblings in our wedding parties, primarily because my fiance and I have 3 sisters each, and only one brother between the two of us, so it would be six on my side, one on his, without any friends added to the mix yet. Along with that, I am 12 and 16 years older than two of my sisters. Don't get me wrong, I love them very much and still am close with them. However, it's not a typically sister bond, as we didn't really grow up together. Especially with the younger one, I almost have more parental relationship. That being said, we agreed on no siblings and our families are more than fine with it. If we have none, nobody is included while someone else is left out. And that's just for the wedding party - if anyone wants to be included or have a "job" in another way, we plan on figuring that out.

However, my fiance has 4 nephews and a niece and he wants all of them included somehow, which I totally get. We are close with all the kids, and I am especially close with his 8-year-old niece, as I was her babysitter for several years. Here's the problem - his niece is the same age as my youngest sister. So while instinct may say make the kids the ring bearers and flower girl, I can't really include his niece in the wedding party without including my sister who is the same age. And if I include one sister, we've got to include them all - which we already decided against.

So my question is, what are some good jobs for kids at weddings? We were thinking about making programs and having our niece and my two youngest sisters hand them out or something like that. But I'd love more suggestions! Thanks in advance!

It isn't necessary to find "jobs" for your underage relatives in order to "include" them in your wedding. The kids will be "included" by being guests. Asking them to hand things out or to take on other "jobs" won't give them more of a sense of "inclusion."