I am having a very small wedding this Fall. I have 4 bridesmaids, and none of us live in the same state anymore. Because it's hard for everyone to travel and because of coronavirus, I am having very few pre-wedding events. They were all invited to only 3 events, none of which they had to plan. The first was wedding dress shopping which I flew to my hometown for since that was an easier location for everyone to travel to (besides me) since they all lived within an hour drive. All but one girl was able to make it to at least one boutique with me. Originally, my sister was planning my bachelorette in Atlanta where we're from and where most people live at least relatively close. Then because of all the coronavirus stuff happening, that event had to be cancelled. Even though it's unorthodox, I decided I would just plan my own bachelorette party in my current and wedding location and I asked the girls to come in one day early to celebrate with me if they could. It was just going to be a chill night out in the city. Again, all of my bridesmaids except the same one from before can make it. Finally, there's a sleepover in the hotel's luxury suite that I booked for everyone the night before the wedding. They are all in town for sure, so everyone should be able to attend, right? No, again the same girl says she can't make it because her husband doesn't want to be left alone in their hotel room for a night. The reason she can't get here a day early is because her husband works and can only take the one day off, and he also doesn't want to fly up here by himself on Friday. She says she can't choose her friend over her husband, which I would understand, except his request to not be left alone seems unreasonable to me. My question is am I the bad guy? Is this reasonable, or should I even let her be a bridesmaid? At this point all she will do is stand next to me on the day of, without participating at all. I haven't asked any of my bridesmaids for any effort at all except attendance, and it really hurts my feelings that she's doing this.
Edit: Thanks for everyones advice. I will get over myself.