Wedding Woes

Plan for November 2021 or wait until summer 2022?

Hi all,

I just got engaged during the holidays and started gearing up to plan a wedding for end of November 2021 (been together forever, I am 32, didn't want to wait long)... I have never been the girl who had a dream wedidng in mind or really thought about my wedding at all. But, oddly enough, one thing I always thought would be nice was a Thanksgiving weekend wedding (in my culture, we don't have Thanksgiving traditions, so overwhelming majority of my guests would not be impacted by the holiday weekend but instead would have extra time to travel for the weekend).

However, I am having huge second thoughts because it is an indoor venue, I don't know what limitations will look like, and I don't want to force people to wear a mask if they don't want to. I don't want to sound like I am not taking COVID seriously, because I am, but... the thought of wearing a mask at a wedding sounds awful... mainly because we are paying for open bar and big cocktail hour. If there is a gov't mask mandate, then guests would have to wear a mask unless they are sitting at their table (so probably people will just sit at their table the whole time). I was planning under the impression that with the vaccine out, limitations would be easing up and things would be somewhat back to normal by end of November. My fiance made a good point that we shouldn't plan a wedding (and be locked into such a huge spend) based off "hopes and dreams" that things are back to "normal."

I don't know if I should just move forward with Nov 2021 and deal with the consequences or wait to see how things shake out over the next few months and try to plan an outdoor wedding in Summer 2022?? 

Wanted to see what people think?

Re: Plan for November 2021 or wait until summer 2022?

  • Unless you live in a state where you already don't have a mask mandate I envision that they may still exist in November.  That said, if we see more vaccinations it's possible that won't be necessary however I'm 40 and in the last group of adults to receive it.  Who knows when my kids will or if everyone will be compliant. 

    I envision that next fall will be much better but probably would tread lightly. 
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited January 12
    I agree with your fiance.  Maybe 2022 would be better?  Just enjoy him and your engagement  and plan/save away.  Also, 32 is YOUNG, waiting another 1/2 a year is nothing 

    OliveOilsMomknottie1bb24b33d33c130f
  • Hi all,

    I just got engaged during the holidays and started gearing up to plan a wedding for end of November 2021 (been together forever, I am 32, didn't want to wait long)... I have never been the girl who had a dream wedidng in mind or really thought about my wedding at all. But, oddly enough, one thing I always thought would be nice was a Thanksgiving weekend wedding (in my culture, we don't have Thanksgiving traditions, so overwhelming majority of my guests would not be impacted by the holiday weekend but instead would have extra time to travel for the weekend).

    However, I am having huge second thoughts because it is an indoor venue, I don't know what limitations will look like, and I don't want to force people to wear a mask if they don't want to. I don't want to sound like I am not taking COVID seriously, because I am, but... the thought of wearing a mask at a wedding sounds awful... mainly because we are paying for open bar and big cocktail hour. If there is a gov't mask mandate, then guests would have to wear a mask unless they are sitting at their table (so probably people will just sit at their table the whole time). I was planning under the impression that with the vaccine out, limitations would be easing up and things would be somewhat back to normal by end of November. My fiance made a good point that we shouldn't plan a wedding (and be locked into such a huge spend) based off "hopes and dreams" that things are back to "normal."

    I don't know if I should just move forward with Nov 2021 and deal with the consequences or wait to see how things shake out over the next few months and try to plan an outdoor wedding in Summer 2022?? 

    Wanted to see what people think?
    I agree with your fiance. If you want to get married sooner, forgo the crowd. If having a large wedding is important to you then be considerate of the health of your guests by taking as many precautions as possible. 
    ei34knottie1bb24b33d33c130f
  • climbingsingleclimbingsingle NYC 'burbs member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Hi all,

    I just got engaged during the holidays and started gearing up to plan a wedding for end of November 2021 (been together forever, I am 32, didn't want to wait long)... I have never been the girl who had a dream wedidng in mind or really thought about my wedding at all. But, oddly enough, one thing I always thought would be nice was a Thanksgiving weekend wedding (in my culture, we don't have Thanksgiving traditions, so overwhelming majority of my guests would not be impacted by the holiday weekend but instead would have extra time to travel for the weekend).

    However, I am having huge second thoughts because it is an indoor venue, I don't know what limitations will look like, and I don't want to force people to wear a mask if they don't want to. I don't want to sound like I am not taking COVID seriously, because I am, but... the thought of wearing a mask at a wedding sounds awful... mainly because we are paying for open bar and big cocktail hour. If there is a gov't mask mandate, then guests would have to wear a mask unless they are sitting at their table (so probably people will just sit at their table the whole time). I was planning under the impression that with the vaccine out, limitations would be easing up and things would be somewhat back to normal by end of November. My fiance made a good point that we shouldn't plan a wedding (and be locked into such a huge spend) based off "hopes and dreams" that things are back to "normal."

    I don't know if I should just move forward with Nov 2021 and deal with the consequences or wait to see how things shake out over the next few months and try to plan an outdoor wedding in Summer 2022?? 

    Wanted to see what people think?
    I would not plan a wedding for this year. 

    Also, I'd like to point that just because your culture doesn't celebrate Thanksgiving doesn't mean they wouldn't be impacted by the holiday weekend. Are they in the US? Would they have to travel in any way? Then yes, they will be impacted by a holiday weekend. Traffic, air travel, hotel costs. These are all things to factor in. 

    ei34OliveOilsMomknottie1bb24b33d33c130f
  • Congrats on your engagement!

    I agree with the others.  It's possible (I personally think even probable) that things will be safe enough in Nov. to have large gatherings without masks.  But I also wouldn't make a large gamble on it.

    Plus I'm guessing it would be an extra stressor for you all.  That's months of questioning/worrying "Did we schedule it too soon?"
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    knottie1bb24b33d33c130f
  • My coworker got engaged in October recently. They're looking at fall 2022 as there is a lot happening and the anticipation is safer as time goes.

    I would suggest Summer 2022
    knottie1bb24b33d33c130f
  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom South Jersey member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Thanksgiving is one of the most expensive travel weekends, not to mention the busiest travel weekend too!  You may also experience higher costs with many vendors who have to forego some family traditions to work your wedding.  If you are not in the US, then it may not be as bad.

    I would also wait until 2022.  My cousin got engaged at the end of 2019.  They set the wedding for winter 2021 and when Covid started to get worse and worse here, in July they moved it to winter 2022.
    knottie1bb24b33d33c130f
  • I agree with your fiance.  Maybe 2022 would be better?  Just enjoy him and your engagement  and plan/save away.  Also, 32 is YOUNG, waiting another 1/2 a year is nothing 
    Haha that gif is about to be me if I have another year + til a wedding. Thanks for your response... with all the stress of covid planning, I am forgetting to just relax and enjoy being engaged!
  • Congrats on your engagement!

    I agree with the others.  It's possible (I personally think even probable) that things will be safe enough in Nov. to have large gatherings without masks.  But I also wouldn't make a large gamble on it.

    Plus I'm guessing it would be an extra stressor for you all.  That's months of questioning/worrying "Did we schedule it too soon?"
    Thank you!

    You basically briefly described all the things going through my mind... I also think it's probable that things will be save enough in November 2021 / maybe not all that different than what it will be in May 2022... but I just don't know. Especially with a new president and a new plan, I'm totally clueless. Maybe in a few months I will have a better idea and then I can make a firm decision on way or another (small wedding if need be, or big/"normal" wedding).

    I haven't slept in a week with the "what ifs" and I certainly can't imagine living like this until November haha!
  • Congratulations on your engagement. While I'm cautiously optimistic about November 2021, it's too soon to know for sure if we'll be okay for large gatherings by then.  Also, if you're in the US, Thanksgiving is pretty much the worst travel time of the entire year whether you celebrate it or not. 

    Between the uncertainty and the potential travel difficulties for your guests, I'd say give yourself some peace of mind and plan the wedding for summer 2022. You'll almost definitely be good to go by then, and you won't spend the next (almost) year losing sleep over whether your wedding can go forward.

    image
  •  I think you should wait till summer 2022!!
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited January 15
    I agree with your fiance.  Maybe 2022 would be better?  Just enjoy him and your engagement  and plan/save away.  Also, 32 is YOUNG, waiting another 1/2 a year is nothing 
    Haha that gif is about to be me if I have another year + til a wedding. Thanks for your response... with all the stress of covid planning, I am forgetting to just relax and enjoy being engaged!
    What was my signature gif again? Lol.  I’ve been using mobile for 2 years now!

    ei34
  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom South Jersey member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    @CharmedPam - Its Amy Schumer eating spaghetti!
    ei34
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    @CharmedPam - Its Amy Schumer eating spaghetti!
    Oh, good choice Pam of 2 years ago, good choice. 

    charlotte989875OliveOilsMomMissKittyDangermrsconn23
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