No Is A Good Answer, When Not Comfortable

short+sassy

To celebrate a milestone, my girlfriend dressed up as a 100-year-old lady; apparently this is fairly common. However, she didn’t stop there. She has now created an elderly alter-ego and expects to be treated as a grandmother while in this mode. She said it’s like crossdressing and even suggested that I dress up so that I can be her “granddaughter.” She has previously made me up, but it was only a costume; I never felt like a different person. She said that it would be fun to go out as grandmother and granddaughter, with me holding her arm or pushing her in a wheelchair. I feel like that might be disrespectful to actual old or disabled people. But I always want to make my girlfriend happy. Should I participate in this?

CharmedPam

“Nope, not my thing”

banana468

What?!? 

Is she in second grade counting up to the 100th day of school?? 

Casadena

I hate to disparage others habits or quirks, but there is no way in hell i'd be comfortable with this either.  Just say no.  

MissKittyDanger

This is like people with kinks - you cannot force someone into something they aren't interested in.

charlotte989875

You don’t have to be into something you’re not into. Your GF isn’t wrong for having this outlet but you also don’t have to participate if you’re not comfortable. 

short+sassy

Casadena said:

I hate to disparage others habits or quirks, but there is no way in hell i'd be comfortable with this either.  Just say no.  

I feel this way also.  But I do think it is inappropriate for the g/f to take on her elderly persona, in public.  Because, even though she doesn't mean any disrespect and is doing this as a persona of her kink, a stranger wouldn't know that and could be really offended if they thought she was making fun of elderly and/or disabled people.

It's also fine for the LW to decide how much or if at all they will engage in this roleplay.

For example, I like my H just the way he is.  If he decided he wanted to take on an "elderly man" or any other persona, I might be okay with that in a very limited way.  But I have no interest in pretending he is someone or something he is not, either frequently or for long periods of time.

downtondiva

I have never heard of anyone dressing up like an elderly person to celebrate a milestone, and I'm not really sure what the girlfriend is getting out of this persona/alter ego. But either way, LW should not feel obligated to join in if they don't feel comfortable with it.

ei34

banana468 said:

What?!? 

Is she in second grade counting up to the 100th day of school?? 

I immediately thought of 100th day of school too.  Didn’t realize adults did it for milestone birthdays.  

What they do in their home is their business.  Agree with PP that out in public, around people who don’t know what they’re doing, it could be viewed as mocking senior citizens.  

banana468

ei34 said:

banana468 said:

What?!? 

Is she in second grade counting up to the 100th day of school?? 

I immediately thought of 100th day of school too.  Didn’t realize adults did it for milestone birthdays.  

What they do in their home is their business.  Agree with PP that out in public, around people who don’t know what they’re doing, it could be viewed as mocking senior citizens.  

Right!  My kid doing it at 7 is weird but confined to a class.  

This is...beyond

ILoveBeachMusic

The dressing up as a 100 year old in elementary school started after mine were at that age. They just took 100 things (marbles, pieces of candy, paper clips etc.). I thought the dressing up for kids was weird when I first heard of it but have never heard of adults doing it to mark a milestone. To each his own in their own home but agree it could definitely look like mocking senior citizens.

MissKittyDanger

We never did the 100 days of school, so that part baffles me lol

banana468

ILoveBeachMusic said:

The dressing up as a 100 year old in elementary school started after mine were at that age. They just took 100 things (marbles, pieces of candy, paper clips etc.). I thought the dressing up for kids was weird when I first heard of it but have never heard of adults doing it to mark a milestone. To each his own in their own home but agree it could definitely look like mocking senior citizens.

Each grade does something if I can recall.   Last year I think it was "pick 100 things to bring in" and in second grade they dress up.  It's to get the kids to learn to count! 

short+sassy

I am a very "uncool" person and have no idea about the latest fads, lol.  So I'm glad it was not just me who had never heard of adults celebrating milestone events this way.

ILoveBeachMusic

banana468 said:

ILoveBeachMusic said:

The dressing up as a 100 year old in elementary school started after mine were at that age. They just took 100 things (marbles, pieces of candy, paper clips etc.). I thought the dressing up for kids was weird when I first heard of it but have never heard of adults doing it to mark a milestone. To each his own in their own home but agree it could definitely look like mocking senior citizens.

Each grade does something if I can recall.   Last year I think it was "pick 100 things to bring in" and in second grade they dress up.  It's to get the kids to learn to count! 

Oh I know it is to get the kids to learn to count. My kids are just old enough to not have done the dressing up part. Some of the costumes are pretty cute - I have FB friends who have young children.