Wedding Etiquette Forum

"I Do, Redo"

My husband and I were suppose to get married in April 2020 but due to COVID-19, we had to postpone and sent all of our guests "Change the Date" cards with our new date. We postponed to October 2020 - thinking there was no way this pandemic would last that long. We were obviously wrong. We decided it was best to postpone any larger celebration. We sent "change of plans" cards to all of our guests saying that we planned to get married in an intimate ceremony in October 2020 and have a larger celebration in October 2021. We got legally married on October 10, 2020 with just our immediate family in attendance. Now I'm starting to plan our larger celebration for October 2021 and completely lost. Should I sent save the dates? When should I send invitations? What wording should I use since we are already married? We do plan to have a vow renewal and reception. Almost like a "I Do, Redo" - but I'm lost on how to explain that to our guests. Any help would be appreciated! Thank you!

Re: "I Do, Redo"

  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic Indiana member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I've never been invited to a vow renewal (not even one for a milestone anniversary) so I don't know if save the dates are done for those. I'm thinking probably not. You have already sent cards to your guests explaining your plans when you changed them for your intimate ceremony. I would make sure you spread the date via word of mouth through family and friends. As for wording on your invitation, you would be inviting people to a vow renewal followed by a reception. No explanation other than that is required.
    downtondivashort+sassy
  • I agree that Save the Dates would be odd for a vow renewal.  Even for a wedding, they aren't necessary.  If it were me, I'd just skip them entirely.

    Send the invitations 6-8 weeks ahead of time.  The event is called a vow renewal.  Especially since all/most of these guests are aware of what happened to the original plans, they will understand that you all already got married, even if they don't already know that.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I don't think there's anything wrong with sending a save-the-date or informally letting people know that the celebration will be in October, but I'd be afraid of tying yourself to anything this far out. I know vaccines are rolling out and we're making progress, but I can't say I'll be terribly shocked if we're not all back to normal again in October. It still seems so unpredictable. 

    I would informally let people know that - pandemic pending - you're planning a big celebration in October, and then send invitations 8 weeks ahead.  
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