Hi! I am planning my wedding for July 2, 2022.
I have read other discussion forums, and the general consensus is that asking for a Pre-RSVP is tacky and not going to work. I don't need even a semi-official number of people attending, I just want to get an idea of who will "definitely not" be attending. The main reason is that we have to start making deposits on rentals, and I really don't have any idea out of our 200 people guest list, if about 75 of those people will even try to attend.
This is why I want to get a feel for guests that will attend-
*The wedding is on a holiday weekend, and we understand that this means some people we are expecting to attend, might not because they have annual 4th of July plans.
*Because of the ongoing pandemic, some people still might not feel comfortable attending weddings.
So, what are your thoughts? Super tacky, not helpful, or an important part of pandemic wedding planning?
EDIT: Thank you guys for your help! I'm going to send out save the dates next month to put it on everybody's radar, and then I'll just get in touch with people! Thanks for the help!
Re: Pre-RSVP
Please don't get it in writing - just put out feelers and know that you are going to need to talk to vendors about any minimums they require.
You're asking people to commit to attending a wedding that's 10 months away. Spreading by word of mouth is a good idea, and I'd send save the dates if you haven't already. But even then, I personally would have a hard time being committing to something so far away.
Talk to your vendors about approximate guest numbers and how they handle that. You can try to target vendors who have flexible options. For your example, there are vendors who would allow you to move your deposit on a 200 person tent to a 100 person tent, and then apply the difference to the balance or to extra upgrades.
Also, FWIW when it wasn't a pandemic I remember hearing family members who were going to go to a wedding ultimately back out. It was when they realized logistics, etc that it just wasn't going to work. So the STD gives them the time to plan or at least keep a mental note.