Wedding Woes

1 marriage, 1 gift.

Dear Prudence,

Do we have to give a second wedding present? The couple in question was married last year, remotely via Zoom. Back then, we sent a handwritten card with a gift, and cheerfully attended the wedding remotely. Now, invitations are going out for the in-person reception, which I know is truly intended to be the actual “wedding” that they were deprived of before—the photographer, the cake, the whole shebang. Is a second gift appropriate?

— Not to Sound Cheap, But …

Re: 1 marriage, 1 gift.

  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    I wouldn’t think so.  I hope the couple isn’t expecting it…
  • I would doubt it.
    If it were me, I might do another card but even then likely not.
  • Nope, you sent them a gift for their wedding, you don’t need to send one for the reception too. 
  • I wouldn't send anything either. 
  • I don't think so.  
  • I know I'm really preaching to the choir, but I absolutely cannot stand it when people call their party, their "real" wedding.  To the extent where it even makes me question if they're mature enough to get married.  I just don't get how blithely people can wave their hand at...getting married.  The most important part.

    So, no, LW.  You do not need to give these people another wedding present.  You already gave them a wedding present for what really was their "actual wedding".
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    Knottie#’s, we’re not discussing WHAT was given… we’re discussing the amount of gifts expected.

    Also, just a wild guess, do you work at juice wrld?
  • You gave a gift when they got legally married, so I really don't think another one is necessary this time.
  • I'm sure the couple isn't expecting it as you've already given them a gift for the ceremony. They should just be happy to finally celebrate their wedding with you.
  • No second gift necessary!  If you feel obligated to not go empty handed, this is why bottles of wine/mead exist provided the couple partake...
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