Wedding Woes

LOL, wut?

Dear Prudence,

I used to volunteer 4-to-5 hours a week at a local food bank. Mostly stock shelving and bookkeeping related stuff. It felt good to help out, there is a definite need, and I was working with like-minded good people, or so I thought. Towards last May, somehow politics came up, and I mentioned how I never vote in presidential elections because I believe the electoral college system is fundamentally unfair, since the individual voter’s fraction of an electoral college vote differs from state to state. I also added that I did vote for a republican in the congressional representative role and for two of the local political candidates, for fiscal policy reasons.

Two days later I got an email saying to never come back, that they did not wish to associate with conspiracy theorists, and they were glad that I was never front-facing. I worked with these people for years and somehow my “conspiracy theories” never came up, probably because they do not exist.

Since then, I’ve had extra time on my hands. And I know that I ought to find somewhere else in a similar role to volunteer, get back on the community outreach and help wagon again. I still think it’s important, and there is still a definite need. Every time I think about it, I lose all energy to continue and get angry about how idiotically tribalistic they were at the place I used to help at. And it’s been close to six months and I still haven’t gotten around to it, even though I keep telling myself “yeah, I should start again soon.” How do I regain my motivation?

— Trying to Regain the Spark

Re: LOL, wut?

  • Casadena said:
    Not voting bc the electoral college system sucks is stupid.  Also, "fiscal policy" reasons often end up hurting the same people LW seems so desperate to help (not that desperate obviously).  Idk, i can't muster up much sympathy although I think the Org she was working for didn't need to be so obnoxious with their email.  
    I'm going to disagree slightly on the local side.  My H grew up in a small wealthy town and it wasn't very fiscally responsible.  The fiscal policy in that town itself caused the taxes to double in less than 10 years all because every time an educational proposal came across it was voted in.    We're talking a town with zero poverty, zero low income and at the time only a tiny 1-2 bedroom home at under 1500 square feet could be found for under half a million bucks.  Many people including my ILs got out because it stopped being sustainable to live there.   

    That said, I am questioning a lot of what LW has stated here.  My guess is that LW ranted more than they thought and may benefit from some conversations outside their echo chamber. 
  • Nothing they specifically mentioned in their letter is related to a conspiracy theory.  That is exactly how the electoral college (EC) works.  It is huge piles of bs that a person's vote in one state counts as 1.57 and a person's vote in another state counts as .68.  I made those numbers up, but it is something like that for the most/least.

    For all the big ado people make about presidential elections, unless you are in a swing state, your vote DOESN'T count for the president.  I would never go as far as to say people shouldn't vote and I do vote myself in presidential elections.  But I definitely understand why the LW feels that way.  There is no doubt it is the local and state elections where individual votes are substantially more powerful. 

    It absolutely shocks and sickens me that more people aren't mad about the EC, considering two elections in my lifetime have been turned by it.  What happened to "the majority rules"?  But I'll get off my and the apparently the LW's soapbox now, lol.

    I think there is a lot more to this story we aren't getting.  I also think the LW wasn't as mild mannered, middle-of-the-road as they describe themselves.  I can't say if the charity was right or wrong to let them go.  But they were definitely AHs about it.  The LW regularly worked there for years, voluntarily, and I assume there wasn't an issue or much of one.  After that kind of devotion, they deserved to be thanked for their work and more nicely told that the organization no longer wanted their services.

    I don't think the LW should beat themselves up about not going back into charity work yet.  They aren't emotionally ready yet and I can understand why.  It's bad enough to be treated sh***y by an employer, but to be treated like that by an organization where you so generously volunteered your time is even more upsetting.  I'm sure they will be ready someday and, when the time is right, they will feel it.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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