Wedding Woes

Ask to be moved next time.

Dear Prudence,

What is the etiquette for excessive perfume in a restaurant? Last night my wife and I were dining outdoors, and a couple was seated about 7-to-8 feet away from us.
Even at that COVID-safe distance outdoors, the perfume was so extreme and excessive our eyes watered and we had difficulty tasting our food. It was like walking through the perfume counter at a department store and being assaulted by every salesperson spraying a sample in your face. My sinuses burned all night from it.

Is the proper form here to just grin and bear it, or would it have been acceptable to ask for a different table. Or since there were no outdoor tables left, and we could only move indoors, would it have been within the bounds of decency to ask the chemical warriors to be moved?

— Fragrance Stinks

Re: Ask to be moved next time.

  • mrsconn23 said:

    Dear Prudence,

    What is the etiquette for excessive perfume in a restaurant? Last night my wife and I were dining outdoors, and a couple was seated about 7-to-8 feet away from us.
    Even at that COVID-safe distance outdoors, the perfume was so extreme and excessive our eyes watered and we had difficulty tasting our food. It was like walking through the perfume counter at a department store and being assaulted by every salesperson spraying a sample in your face. My sinuses burned all night from it.

    Is the proper form here to just grin and bear it, or would it have been acceptable to ask for a different table. Or since there were no outdoor tables left, and we could only move indoors, would it have been within the bounds of decency to ask the chemical warriors to be moved?

    — Fragrance Stinks

    Ask to be moved.  Is it annoying when people don't "get" that they've overdone their personal scent?  Yes.  If they were there first then I think you need to request an alternate eating location.  As annoying as it is I don't think you can ask for the wait staff to bring a hot wash cloth and soap to the offenders. 
  • You can always ask to move tables. You cannot ask that the other couple be moved. 
    short+sassycharlotte989875ei34climbingsingle
  • I've asked to move due to perfume scent.
    Unless there's a reason, most places can move you and are fairly understanding.
  • Etiquette:

    --Asking to move to a different table-->Perfectly fine and pretty normal.  I'm not sure why the OP didn't request this to begin with.

    --Asking the perfume heavy person be moved to a different table-->Rude AF and most/all restaurants would never do this.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    STARMOON44MissKittyDangercharlotte989875ei34
  • mrsconn23 said:
    LW stop acting like you martyred yourself.  Also, a restaurant will never move a patron at another one's request.  

    Furthermore if you're that sensitive to scent, then maybe you should get to-go next time at eat in your scent-free home.   

    Have people really forgotten everything about being in public in the last 20 months? /s 
    Good point.  Are you talking people who are walking around in a huge fog or just "oh I don't like scent"? 
    mrsconn23VarunaTT
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    My aunt lost her scene of smell, and sometimes (not all the time) has a tendency to over use.  I always keep that in mind when someone is overpowering.

    Nothing at all wrong in asking to move. Unless, in this situation there were no more seats?

    ei34
  • I oftentimes wonder how people survive day to day when they have to write in to Prudie for situations like this.

    Just ask to be moved or get the food to go.  I'm very sensitive to smell, so much so that one of the places I worked had to change the floral arrangements they brought in, b/c my reactions to some flowers get pretty horrific.  I deal with it.  I don't want to seem heartless, but FFS, just quietly explain the situation to the server and asked to be moved.  If that's not possible, get the food to go.
    mrsconn23short+sassyclimbingsingle
  • levioosalevioosa Southern California member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Jfc, just move to a different table. 

    —says someone who is extremely sensitive to smells. 


    image
    VarunaTTMissKittyDanger
  • ei34ei34 member
    Ninth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    VarunaTT said:
    I oftentimes wonder how people survive day to day when they have to write in to Prudie for situations like this.

    Just ask to be moved or get the food to go.  I'm very sensitive to smell, so much so that one of the places I worked had to change the floral arrangements they brought in, b/c my reactions to some flowers get pretty horrific.  I deal with it.  I don't want to seem heartless, but FFS, just quietly explain the situation to the server and asked to be moved.  If that's not possible, get the food to go.
    Someone (actually, two whole people, the LW and wife) who doesn't have it together enough to simply ask the server to be moved actually completely strikes me as the person who needs to write to Prudie over such a silly instance.
    mrsconn23short+sassyVarunaTT
  • People here wear sooooo much perfume. One guy explained that people want you to be intrigued when they walk by. Like, "oooooh who's that? They smell so good". But this in not the place to be for those sensitive to fragrance.
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